Airport gifts - would this annoy you?

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DH & I - married 25+ years etc, no longer in the ‘romantic gifts’ stage etc and mostly buy things we want for ourselves, or give specific suggestions for birthdays/Christmas etc. I’m very against wasting money on unnecessary tat etc.
DH has been away on a ‘boys trip’ with some male friends and texted me from return airport saying ‘do we need anything from duty free?’ I replied ‘no thanks/think we’re fine’. We had loads of alcohol left over from Christmas when DH went out and bought too much (despite me pointing out we didn’t need it).
He then sent me a photo of a perfume I used to wear about 10 years ago, but stopped as I went off it. He also knows this, as he has suggested it before and I explained. I replied ‘no thanks, don’t wear that anymore’
He’s now texted ‘well what about something else?’ and is sending me random pics of all sorts of crap in the airport.
I can’t explain, but this has really pissed me off! I think maybe the other blokes are buying (nice?) stuff for their wives and he feels pressured to do the same, but realised he doesn’t know what, and is trying to make it my problem?

I don’t want chocs/Toblerone due to health issue/trying to lose weight.

To be honest, if he’s going to spend £50 on crap I’d rather he save it for a meal out /takeaway etc when he’s home.
Strange that money is right for certain things, but then he has it to burn in an airport…

Tight, not right!

Bloody hell, he probably just wants to spoil you because he's had a great time and wants you to be happy too.

I bet he's dreading getting home.

My ex husband used to not buy me anything when he travelled, and he doesn't buy the kids anything still. I'd have been delighted with someone asking what I'd like

I think he thinks he owes you a treat! I think you need to have a chat or to at least look at the duty free offerings online to be prepared!!!

He's trying to fo something nice. if you would would prefer that he use the £50 towards a meal out instead, why not just say so?!

Seriously, I don’t get the ‘you’re hard work’ & ‘poor sod’ comments?

He asked if we needed/I wanted anything and I politely said no thanks. And now he’s pestering me to choose SOMETHING for him to waste money on just so he can appear to be a ‘good husband’ alongside his friends??
And because I don’t want to be part of his game I am the baddie?

I don’t want two minutes notice and a barrage of texts to decide what I want for my birthday, from a limited selection of over-priced airport tat!

But he won’t find the things I’d like in airport duty free…

I think you're missing a trick. Now would be the opportunity to acquire a nice expensive bottle of Tom Ford perfume that he has to buy otherwise he'd look stingy in front of his friends.

There you go.

That's what he's guilty about.

He knows you're pissed off he's spending money on himself when it's supposedly tight so is trying to buy you off

@LubaLuca

Yeah cause telling the op to be grateful her oh is panic buying her a gift with no thought that she doesn't want or like isnt a stupid comment

Just ask him for a big Toblerone!

No wonder men struggle . He was trying to do something nice . Be more grateful OP.

This sounds like something that would benefit from talking about in therapy, perhaps.

His reasons make you feel uncared for / unlistened to (for example) and assuming it’s to look good in front of his friends. He might (for example) say ‘I know she doesn’t like surprises or wasting money so I thought I should ask while I’m in duty free, her birthday’s coming up and I got it wrong before.) and then you get to explain why it makes you feel stressed / uncared for etc.

I totally get the annoyance but maybe if you think the best of each other’s intentions there will be a middle ground where you (for example) write down a list so he knows and can’t say he’s forgotten, and he doesn’t do things like this. Honestly though - like most long relationships, there’s probably multilayered stuff worth working through. You might surprise yourselves in good ways!

Perhaps, although we both have our own money and I have just been away too, so it’s not like little wifey has been left at home!

Ha, I’ve just realised what hot pockets means. I was working out if you but handwarmers or something 🤣

I've got to agree with this.

There's just no pleasing some people

Meh, he's probably got some cash left over he's trying to get rid of. The last time DH and I flew, he handed me €30 at the airport and told me to go spend it. He'd spied some nice scarves he thought I'd like, and he couldn't be bothered with bringing the cash back.
I didn't in the end as the scarves weren't quite what I was looking for, so that €30 is sat in our crap drawer where we will inevitably forget to pick it up next time we go away.

He's likely bored, with some leftover cash, and wondered if you wanted anything with it. Entertains him, and you may get something out of it.

Which airport? Butlers chocolates are nice, better than a Toblerone but not stupidly expensive and you can regift them if you don’t want to eat them yourself 😀

Airports are my favourite place to shop.

what’s not to love? Perfume, makeup, sunglasses, books, holiday clothes, bags, accessories, overpriced pots of tapenade. I’m a fool for it all.

it always feels like free money in the airport! DD5 has the bug as well.

if DH said that in an airport, ooooo happy days!!

"Thanks so much for thinking of getting me something, it's a kind thought. How bout we spend fifty quid on a dinner out/takeaway/cinema trip/whatever rather than perfume though?"

You're being a bit of a dick op

You must have a sad relationship if this is your first thought when a husband suggest taking his wife some perfume home from duty free.

Poor guy. I'd be grateful and chuffed he had thought of me and went to a bit of effort.

@Iceicebabytoocold

It was fairly tongue in cheek.

The op must have a sad relationship too. She's the 1 pissed off with him

The effort involves op having to pick her own present through a phone for something she doesn't want. He's not putting much mental thought into it. He's not remembering that she hasn't used that perfume for a decade etc. You can expect more from a man than having to be grateful every time he makes a half arsed gesture because his mates are.