Money Vanishing

[EllieBear20]

Hey everyone, feel like I need an outside perspective on this matter.

So my partner and I was in a good place. Then I notice an envelope of money has gone missing. There were thousands inside as it was my savings towards a future big purchase.

I have never blamed anyone in this apart from myself (thinking I have misplaced it but have now looked everywhere). So although I haven't accused my partner or anyone else of that matter, he is of course defending himself and now understandably there is a wedge between us. He says it's not like we can ignore it and go back to normal.

Now I feel I have the mystery of the money and a possible relationship breakdown.

What does this sound like to you? What can you do in this situation?

Tia x

You know some interesting people 😉

Oh behave! I’ve had cash in the house before, was saving spending money for a big holiday, didn’t live near a branch (because guess what, shit loads have been closed down) and I wanted access to it at short notice so I could get it exchanged on a day when the rate was good. Nothing dodgy about it.

Or people that just have more money than you 😉

When you live rurally and aren't up to speed with technology (or don't trust it...) it's very common to make larger withdrawals on pay/pension/benefit dat and keep cash in the house to pay as you go....

Actually it's really common to use this method for people who struggle to budget. All gets enveloped up into shopping/fuel/treats/dinner money etc..... Nothing dodgy or illegal about it at all 🙄

Sure. Keep dreaming.

I once read an article by a reformed (?) burglar, who said scumbags who break into houses want to be in and out as quick as possible.
They know to look in all the obvious places, and according to the burglar the best place was somewhere known to you in the loft, as they can't waste the time accessing the loft. Oh and put any cash/valuable paperwork in a tin to deter any critters noshing on your valuables!

See that's the beauty of it. Not all of us have to dream💰💰💰💰

Why is he feeling the need to ‘defend himself’ when you haven’t accused him?

Sure.

This.

I am sympathetic to losing such a large amount of money, but keeping cash like that is either just financially unwise (gets lost, stolen and doesn’t earn any interest- which on thousands of pounds will be substantial), and more likely because the only real reasons involve some kind of financial fraud (benefits fraud, tax evasion, avoiding child maintenance etc).

I’ll assume OP just genuinely doesn’t know that savings accounts earn interest and are just as easy to access now as cash.

However, if the reasons are more dodgy, then the odds are DP and DM have an equally dodgy attitude towards financial honestly, which would make it less surprising that it’d disappear.

If she is on benefits she'll have a bank account, so that fish won't fly.

Is there a reason you haven't kept this safe in the bank?
I'm not saying he should be able to steal whatever is lying around in the house, but it just seems very strange that you'd save up in cash in several envelopes that amount to thousands of pounds.

From Citizens Advice;

If you can't use a bank account
You can't get cheque payments for benefits paid by the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP) or by HM Revenue and Customs (HMRC).

If you are unwilling or unable to open an account for payment of your benefit, the DWP will pay you using the Payment Exception Service.

The Payment Exception Service uses a system called i-movo. You'll be able to collect your benefit from a PayPoint outlet in local shops and newsagents. You can search for your nearest store on the PayPoint website.

The DWP will send you vouchers by text message, email or post. You'll need your voucher, a memorable date and proof of ID in order to collect your cash. The DWP does not need your agreement in order to pay you in this way, so if you cannot or do not wish to be paid into an account, the Payment Exception Service will be the only other option. Find out more about the Payment Exception Service on the GOV.UK website.

HMRC can also send you vouchers by text message or post.

If you have difficulty opening an account you can also get help from your nearest Citizens Advice.

If you lose your entitlement to tax credits because you do not have an account, or if you have any difficulty getting paid other benefits because you do not have an account, you should get help from your nearest Citizens Advice.

Everyone keeps saying it seems very strange but nobody seems to be able to explain why. It clearly wasn't strange to OP. It isn't strange to lots of older people either. Look what happened when Northern Rock collapsed. Did we all think the people withdrawing all their life savings in cash were very strange or dodgy or evading tax or up to something illicit? I don't see why there needs to be a reason. Some people just keep large amounts of cash in the house. It nly tends to be the super wealthy who flaunt it that get burgled and have thousands of pounds in cash taken.

Multiple people have explained why.

Elderly people who are genuinely wary of banks are highly unlikely to be using mumsnet.

The most common reasons for saving thousands as cash, rather than in an account, are for fraud-related reasons. Some people normalise “low level” benefit fraud, tax evasion and child maintenance evasion, but ultimately it is financial fraud and illegal.

It's not only the wealthy that get burgled.

Who cares why it's not in a bank! That wasn't her question.

Because dodgy people usually mix with dodgy people. If she is doing something illegal, her partner knows it and knows she can't denounce him. That would explain why he took the money. Simples.

I care 😂

Oh do bore off......

If someone doesn't agree with your opinion, bore off. Very mature. Do you evade taxes?

If you are clear you have checked everywhere then your mum or your partner have taken it. Does your DP have any money issues? Have you transparent finances so you can see if anything large has been paid off like a credit card? Have you checked his credit rating? You can do that easily for a small fee and it can also tell you what debts he has and banks etc

Nope..... But maybe channel your tax evasion anger to the millionaires of this country who are ripping off the UK first before attacking/accusing the minions of the country just trying to earn a living to keep their families warm and fed.

You've completely derailed this thread.... Start your own one.

Having a large cash stash is not in itself dodgy. I do and taxes have been paid on every bit of it. We were raised to always have plenty on hand for emergencies.

It's in a locked box in the loft.

So the little tax evaders like you are ok?