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Original poster

How often do you...

42 replies

gorillalala · 27/01/2023 17:31

...and your partner have sex?
I'm more interested in replies from those with children.

Prompted by reading a thread on asexuality earlier today.. (just to explain the validity of the question before anyone thinks I'm a troll)

I've been curious about this lately, having had second baby 10 months ago and finally (a few months ago) finding more time to put more effort and thought into sex with DH.

I know that people have different sex drives and there may be no 'normal' amount, but since this is not something that I personally want to quiz friends about, I don't really know what the 'range' is.

For what it's worth - I would say I have a low sex drive, and DH would like more but understands that we're not the same.

Also for what it's worth, I don't have any issue in my relationship or sex life... just curious about what the rest of the population are doing :)

Thanks for any replies!

OP posts:
lottie198 · 27/01/2023 17:39

Currently about once a month...
Mainly because we co sleep and baby is just over 1. We literally don't get the time or space 😩. I'm also still breast feeding so my drive is pretty low.
Before baby it was about 3/4 times a week.

Ihaveoflate · 27/01/2023 19:08

About once or twice a week, maybe more during ovulation when I'm horniest.

It hasn't always been like this, though. We've just come out of quite a slump where we'd go a month or two (or even three) without sex. It was like that for about 3 years after our daughter was born.

Original poster
gorillalala · 29/01/2023 09:10

Thanks for the replies :)

Anyone else want to share...?

OP posts:
HAF1119 · 29/01/2023 09:12

On a normal working week once or twice at the weekend (3.5yo) if we have a bit of time off then more like daily :)

Biscuits1011 · 29/01/2023 09:12

7 kids here. 3 under 5. We do it about 2-3 a week. More sometimes, but also less sometimes. Depends, but we make time by just going to bed earlier. Can’t do it in the day too many kids about 👀

Palmfrond · 29/01/2023 09:22

Once or twice a week. Kids are primary school age.
But really, I’m not sure what the benefit of comparing your own situation to others’ is, everyone is different, different kids, different sex drives, different ages etc, and of course you’ll get the mumsnetters who claim to be having amazing sex ten times a week even though they’ve got four children under the age of ten.

MyWillyBrokeTheDogBowl · 29/01/2023 09:24

Two kids under 7, I’d say 3-4 times a week on average.

Lcb123 · 29/01/2023 09:27

Prob 1 a week and no kids! We’re both happy with that. If you and your partner are happy then I wouldn’t compare to other

Mellymoon · 29/01/2023 09:54

my kids are older now (teens) but everyday or sometimes 5 times a week. When they were little it was about every other night though I’m not with their dad anymore. I suppose I’ve been lucky in having partners who were quite well matched in sex drive.

boymum2323 · 02/02/2023 17:28

hi, we have 3 boys together, 7,9,14 weve been married 12 years and still have a really good sex life, id say 5/6 times a week sometimes more

Lolacat1234 · 02/02/2023 17:31

2 kids here, probably once or twice a week. DH would do it daily if I wanted it more. I'm definitely the lower drive of the two of us.

SouperNoodle · 02/02/2023 17:33

2 young children (youngest usually gets into our bed at 4am) and married about 8 years.
We vary from 1-2 a week to 1 and month.
It all depends on how busy/tired we are.

Anothernick · 02/02/2023 18:52

Our DC are in their 20s now but when they were young we agreed that we should try not to go longer than a week without. And we largely stuck to that and still do now even though we are well into our 60s. Sex is the glue in an LTR, it will keep you together when everything else is falling apart - we've been together more than 30 years and I'm not sure we would have lasted this long had it not been for an enduring sexual desire for each other.

Original poster
gorillalala · 03/02/2023 21:42

Thanks everyone for sharing, it's been interesting reading.

Yeah @Anothernick I've heard people say similar about how important sex life is in a LTR.

OP posts:
Flumo · 03/02/2023 21:49

3 kids here, 11, 8 and 2 we try doing it at least 2 times a week would like more but my daughters ( 11 year old ) is normally still awake when we go to bed 😖

Nina9870 · 03/02/2023 22:32

We have two kids, oldest is 2, youngest is 7 months and has just started sleeping through so we’ve been able to pick things up again. We have sex about 4 times a week.
previously, with a baby who didn’t sleep through- maybe once a week if we were lucky.

lurchermummy · 03/02/2023 22:33

Not for years.

Namechange192727171 · 03/02/2023 22:34

Usually 1-3 times per month. I'd happily do every night, DH not so much which doesn't exactly make me feel great..

Namechange192727171 · 03/02/2023 22:35

Forgot to add mine are 14 years and 18 months(sleeping through)

Kkk17 · 05/07/2023 20:25

Have an 8 year old but still manage to have sex every day. We are both very horny 😂and have high sex drives

CoffeeCakeAndALattePlease · 05/07/2023 20:33

2 kids, age 4 and 7…. On average once a week. Sometimes more and sometimes less.

SallyWD · 05/07/2023 21:14

Two children aged 12 and 10. Probably have sex 2 or 3 times a month. We're so tired! Not necessarily because of the kids anymore but just work, life etc.

PollyODarton · 05/07/2023 21:20

Three kids 8, 5 and 11 months... madness about every second night

Otherlover · 05/07/2023 21:31

We have older DC and do it once a month or less.

At this stage in my life (35), I'd rather have more money than orgasms. I glow when my savings are fat and healthy. I feel secure and loved when I know I have money to fall back on. I feel respect and admiration for my DH when he brings in a fat cheque after fat cheque. I had a very skilled, amazing in bed man before him and he was such a useless, lecherous, gross, lazy man. The orgasms meant nothing as he gave me such an ick with his attitudes. He was very stupid but very good in bed and always horny. You just can't have it all and I'd rather have money.

Sex is also rather gross if you really think about it. I'm not asexual nor do I have low libido.

SunnyLion · 05/07/2023 21:38

Every other day. I have 2 teenagers.
I'd have sex with my hudband every day if I could.