Friend doesn't see me as a dateable person

[somesadcrush]

I was really happy today because I had a message from a guy I like, you know how it is, it's so exciting when you realise someone might like you back etc. (emphasis very much on "might"). Well, about an hour ago I phoned my friend to discuss the message and I was expecting her to be happy for me. Instead she got really worked up and just acted as though the message from the guy was ridiculous but also scary and something to be worried about, i.e. she didn't see that he might be interested in me at all. She just said things like "well, that's very worrying" and "I'd be very careful" and her tone of voice was almost angry. I mean, sure be careful, but what a strange way to react to your friend telling you about something possibly happening with someone they've met.

Her reaction has absolutely floored me but it's made me realise she doesn't see me as someone that a man might be interested in at all, her bizarre reaction showed that. I don't have a history of getting involved with strange men or anything. All I can think is that as I've been single for a long time now, she just sees me as someone who no-one is interested in. Which, while I am single, isn't the case. I'm not good-looking but I get my fair share of men interested in me for my age etc.

Absolutely stumped with this one but it's really brought me down and made me think, "Wait, maybe I am this eternally single person". But it's almost made me think that I don't know if I should be friends with someone who sees me as someone who no-one would be interested in.

What a bizarre thing to happen 😕 Welcome any insight into this! I'm not sure what on earth just happened!

Go or don't go. Who knows?
Either way someone will have an opinion.
But whatever you do you have to accept responsibility as only you know all the details, including the emoji.

So what is the emoji OP? Something tells me it's a crucial part of the story!

I reckon it’s 😜

It sounds like she fancies you?

You say she very rarely likes men, maybe it’s you she likes?

I am going to guess the obvious 🍆

Plus the fact that (if it’s the one previously posted about) he goes quickly from woman to woman, I am inclined to agree it could come across as creepy

Don't understand why you haven't said the emoji either. The guy's whole potential character assassination & AIBU totally depends on what emoji he used!

Sorry everyone, he's messaged me again, we are messaging now 😅

Why did she call him creepy? She must have spelled it out to you. What are you leaving out?

Is this the man who jumps from woman to woman who you've posted about recently?

She might have the hots for you even OP. Some people don't like their friends in relationships. Personally I'd crack on and not really mention it to her until she does.

What was the fucking emoji? 😂 tell us please!

Was it 😎

What if she has genuine concerns. What if she knows he is a predator.
Find out why she is saying what she is.

Was it this 😏

This. I feel like it's the "middle square" of Catchphrase.

'The middle square' YES.

Give us some details and context OP, if not you might as well not bother posting 🙄

Yes, it’s weird that you haven’t given the emoji or the message, to gauge general opinion. I think you like the attention?

I’m going to pretend he said

Let’s go for a “coffee” 👉🏻👌🏻

Well, sometimes friends hold you back rather than push you forward. If I'd listened to my friends I'd never have got anything done. Sometimes it pays to be a bit selective about what you tell to whom. I've also had the opposite experience too - of being strongly encouraged by friends to form a relationship with a man who I did not find attractive because he had a crush on me, apparently. 'What's wrong with him?' they cried. Well, I don't fancy him and I find his personality irritating.

Irrespective of the emoji, surely having a coffee can't be too risky, especially in a cafe with other people around. It may not be the love of your life but it could pass an hour or two pleasantly.

I mean it's the only sensible way forward if she's not going to tell us...

She's single from choice and she views you as single but not from choice, which makes her feel slightly superior. Hence her not liking the idea of you finding a bloke, because you'll then be superior to her.
I think.

Was the emoji an aubergine?

Also, perhaps your friend knows this particular man and is well aware of his creepiness, hence her warning you off him. Either that, or she's jealous, and wants him for herself.

Enjoy your date.

She's jealous

🤣🤣🤣🤣

OP, you clearly think the emoji is dodgy too, or you’d say.

This is like getting one of your kids to own up.

What about the one you were in love with recently? Is this him?