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Original poster

Should I trust him ?

110 replies

AuntieJen · 18/12/2022 08:38

My husband went out on his work Christmas do which he tells me finished at 1am, but he didn’t return home until 4.40am. He tells me he was sharing a taxi with a co-worker as they were both going in the same direction, he was supposed to drop off first but says she was very drunk and didn’t want to leave her alone with the taxi driver after he got out so he took her home. He swears nothing happened said they went in had a cup of tea and chatted, and that her 21 year son was upstairs - my brain is telling me this doesn’t happen! He returned home being overly chatty and nice. His location had also been paused on his phone at 1.20am, said he didn’t know, well that can’t happen by itself can it? I am so upset it’s tearing me apart - I can’t live with someone that has been unfaithful to me. Any advice pls.

OP posts:
BelgiumArse · 20/12/2022 01:34

So he works with this woman.

For a start I agree with the pp's, I wouldn't believe him.
Maybe you keeping tabs on him at the moment was a gut instinct about him at the moment, is he mid life crisis age?

Any way if this woman has had your husband conversing through the dead of night for 3 hours I doubt they were chatting about the weather.

Going forwards are you going to be trusting of him at work, or is this woman going to be dripping poison into his ear about how you are controlling and how you track and won't allow him to enjoy an evening out without checking up on him.

This sounds like a saga that's likely to run well past Christmas now, partners in crime.

He's a fool and he's fucked up, are you going to forgive him ?
I also agree with the pp, go and get a sexual health check up, as they say you don't know where he's been now.

Bookworm20 · 20/12/2022 10:15

So his work thing ended at 1 and then at 1.26 his location paused. Except he didn't pause it and doesn't know how to do it. And then he went awol until 4am.

What a massive fucking coincidence stoke of bad luck his location glitched at that time! I really feel for these men who seem to have so many issues with technology these days! And always right at the moment they could otherwise prove their innocence.

The dropping someone off first because they are drunk. Absolutely fine, and would be the right thing to do. Going in to their house, waving the taxi away with the intention of 'drinking tea' for a couple of hours, sorry, but no. What an odd thing to do. Especially given he choose not to let his wife know that is what he was doing and the woman was apparently so drunk she was unable to get herself home.

Dropping off this incredibly drunk colleague might not even have happened, as he hid his location. He could have been anywhere and was using his little 'i'm a hero' story to cover his tracks. Which has massively backfired.

I'm so sorry OP. It just does not make any plausible sense.

The little detail about the 21 year old son. Most men who are cheating add in real life details to the story, just changed up a bit, to add plausibility. Its very possible colleagues 21 year old son picked her/ both of them up from the work do (hence him being added to the story) or was there picking up her just as your DH was leaving to go to god knows where.

rstare786 · 20/12/2022 10:24

AuntieJen · 18/12/2022 08:38

My husband went out on his work Christmas do which he tells me finished at 1am, but he didn’t return home until 4.40am. He tells me he was sharing a taxi with a co-worker as they were both going in the same direction, he was supposed to drop off first but says she was very drunk and didn’t want to leave her alone with the taxi driver after he got out so he took her home. He swears nothing happened said they went in had a cup of tea and chatted, and that her 21 year son was upstairs - my brain is telling me this doesn’t happen! He returned home being overly chatty and nice. His location had also been paused on his phone at 1.20am, said he didn’t know, well that can’t happen by itself can it? I am so upset it’s tearing me apart - I can’t live with someone that has been unfaithful to me. Any advice pls.

If she was that drunk, I doubt she'd be able to "chat" with him over a cup of tea?!

Aikko · 20/12/2022 10:53

The female colleague probably wasn't even that drunk - if she was, they wouldn't be 'chatting' for 3 hours, especially if her adult son was there anyway.
It would simply have been a quick drop off and make sure she's OK and her son is there to take over, then off you go back home.

The son being there was a red herring (he wasn't there), and they were shagging each other for 3 hours.
Him being overly chatty and nice in the morning is his guilty conscience.

Mari9999 · 20/12/2022 12:02

Put him out. It does not matter what the truth may be. Obviously, he must have a history of lying and cheating ,and everyone knows that tracking devices are infallible and never fail. I don't know what the truth is, but I know that once I was monitoring my husband with a tracking device things would be essentially done.

I was in an Uber last week and the driver mentioned how his tracking device had been malfunctioning every morning for the past week but was fine in the afternoons.

Freeme31 · 21/12/2022 14:34

How are you doing OP hopefully you have been able to clear this up

OldFan · 21/12/2022 14:51

^Put him out. It does not matter what the truth may be. Obviously, he must have a history of lying and cheating ,and everyone knows that tracking devices are infallible and never fail. I don't know what the truth is, but I know that once I was monitoring my husband with a tracking device things would be essentially done.
I was in an Uber last week and the driver mentioned how his tracking device had been malfunctioning every morning for the past week but was fine in the afternoons.^

I did know a bloke who used to deliberately turn it off or whatever so his wife didn't know where he was and it looked like he was at the location he was at when he turned it off. He was cheating. I'm sure it's not unknown for cheaters to do that.

Pottylotty85 · 22/12/2022 21:27

This sounds very similar to my ex husband back in 2018, sorry but he's now married to said woman.

Toohardtofindaproperusername · 22/12/2022 21:39

GreyCarpet · 18/12/2022 09:27

Faithful men don't find themselves in the homes of drunken women in the middle of the night chatting and drinking tea for 3 hours, whilst their location is paused and their wife is at home waiting for them.

That just doesn't happen.

that. 3 hours? chatting? with someone at that time of the morning after a xmas do? he's taking the pxxxx

BizzardLove · 22/12/2022 23:19

Don't allow him to gaslight you.

Spend the evening at a male friends house if possible and tell him you just 'talked'.

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