DH and I have been together for 15 years, since we were teenagers. We've been married 4 years. The first 4-5 years of our relationship were fairly typical for a teenage/early 20s relationship I'd say - quite a lot of drama, on-again off-again, lots of bickering, we'd split up for a week if we had a bad argument and get back together. Very immature. We grew up, matured and stayed together and for the past 10 or so years we've had a very stable, happy relationship (now marriage). We have two kids, a house, a dog and rarely argue, not about anything big anyway.
When I was 20 I cheated on DH with a school friend of both of ours, I'll call him Tim. DH doesn't know the full extent of this. What he does know is that during a summer where he and I were broken up for about 2 months, I hooked up a few times with Tim. He thinks this all happened when we were separated. What he doesn't know, is that about 6 months later, when we were back together, Tim and I kissed (plus some touching) while very drunk at a party. We had had sex several times while DH and I were apart, but on this occasion we didn't go any further, so there was no sex involved in the cheating. I didn't tell DH at the time and never have. So as far as he's aware, once we got back together, nothing further happened between me and John.
After I cheated, I intentionally cut Tim out of my life as much as possible. We have a lot of mutual friends and live in the same area so I've seen him in a group setting from time to time (DH often there too) but have tried to avoid being in a conversation with him, so we haven't had more interaction than occasional small talk since. I haven't seen him socially for years, but have bumped into him a couple of times over the past 5 or so years, been polite and left. For me it's very much a thing of the distant past and feels like something from my childhood - the hooking up when DH and I were separated was during the 2012 Olympics, which feels like a very long time ago!
But I do still feel guilty about it, and the fact that DH is oblivious to the cheating. What would the moral thing be to do here? Part of me wants to get it off my chest. I honestly don't think it'd be much more than a sad conversation at this point, I certainly don't think we'd break our marriage and family up over it. And clearing my conscience about it would feel like a weight off my mind. But would I just be hurting his feelings for no reason? What's the right thing to do at this point? Would you want to know if you were in his position?
Disclaimer - what I did was 100% wrong and I'm in no way trying to minimise it. I'm only trying to explain that how long ago it was and how young we were makes it feel like something that happened in another lifetime. DH and I and are relationship are completely different people to who we were back then, and I certainly didn't think I'd end up marrying my teenage boyfriend and bringing this baggage with me into adult life!