Middle aged men and their fetishes

[whatswiththesefetishes]

So, I've been divorced for a number of years and have been on numerous dates. What I've noticed is that many men who have hit their 50's and are were in long marriages/relationships seem to be very open about their fetishes. I'm wondering if they have got to a certain age whereby, they feel they no longer want to suppress these feelings?

I'm met the following:
A man with a foot fetish
A man with a wee fetish
A man who likes cross dressing
A man how likes 'Daddydom' (I had to look that one up!)
A man who is obsessed by writing erotica
... and a lastly.... and man who wanted to be a wizard!!!

Is it wrong to just want someone who likes changing the oil on his car or who is happy to do the weekly shop?!!!!!

Pun intended

🤣🤣🤣

dadly, I think they're mostly the still happily married ones!!

This. They have allowed their sexual desires to be shaped by porn. Just avoid. Unless you want crap sex fixated on their 'needs.'

@Herejustforthisone at least hagrid would at least stop you feeling the need to wax everything 🤣🤣

I thought this until I met my 40 year old boyfriend, who is wonderful! Don't give up all hope, OP!

My friend met a man through OLD who wanted her to wear stilletos and step on his balls. I'm fascinated. How is that possible? More than once i mean? Wouldn't literally castrate him? How does this work? He was an otherwise normal and functional adult. Not the weirdo stereotype at all.

I keep very fit and am slim so why would I go with an out of shape man my age?

This. I find this. Lots of overweight, unfit flabby late 40s, 50 something men on OLD thinking they are a big catch for women. I keep myself fit and in shape - why on earth would I look at such a man for a shag buddy? And I am their age! And they think 30 year old women are going to competing to shag them! Deluded! One 60 year was saying he was 'open minded' about a 20 something woman approaching him, as long as she did not want a sugar daddy. Utterly deluded man.

Had an ex who used to like watching YouTube videos of women pooing their knickers on purpose.
A guy must have a really low self esteem to get turned on by being a cuckold or getting kicked in the balls.

I think wizard porn would be hilarious.

Very funny. Doesn't exist. I know, I looked. [Joke].

Paganism is actually subverted through both male and female so-called participants of paganism.

Serious hat on. A lot of women are being abused by this common link. There are more female pagans than males.

Then your ex is a sub. Scat in my own experience actually borders on a paraphilia. Others are consensual blood-letting. Golden showers etc.

I know! It's hilarious.
I'm settling into the well liked after mid/ late 40's men at the moment .
Unfortunately, I seem to get a lot of likes from under 35/6 MILF hunters.
Not my vibe right now.

The conversations that really make me smile are the men my age (59+) who comment on how they like my figure and have obviously never bothered with looking after theirs and can't seem to 'get' that when I say 'reasonably fit' in my list of desires, still message.

Deluded

I googled "Wizard porn". The second site suggested read "Cute wizard woman in sex with goblin man..."

I didn't click the link.

I don't think you're a man, but I don't think you've got any right to lecture people about kink. You're still in that "ooh, aren't I shocking" mindset.

The one fit guy my age that I did have 2 dates with was a cyclist and in good shape.
The downside was he was so boring !
Talked about his various cycling trips endlessly and I don't think asked me one single question!
And then wondered if it was a sport / hobby I'd like to join in on? Nope

There is that. The ones who ARE fit and in shape are often very anal about it. And very boring.

This makes me think of the meme "I put on my robe and wizard hat" 😄

(If you google, it's slightly NSFW.)

fetishes or kinks do not make someone more interesting.

It's the equivalent of having a collection of ornamental thimbles. Special to you, but few others.

I came onto this thread to also understand more the difference between a fetish and a kink.

And some things that I now know are regarded as kinks, I thought were just 'normal' sex stuff.
I was in a v long marriage and monogamous and single past couple years.
Only past few months I've ventured into the world of OLD.

I have up on the regular sites and am on Feeld as there's a lot more honesty on there ( and I don't want an LTR ).

The men on the regular sites want the same thing but dress it up in language that they think women like ( so they can get done sex asap).

I had a short chat on Feeld and was asked if I was into choking / asphyxiation.
I'm def not (!) and said so.
Politely we both ended the chat as we didn't match.

No judgement though. That was his thing, it just wasn't mine. We matched on a lot of other areas but pointless moving it forward .

A kink adds to the sexual experience for some people, for example wearing rubber. With a fetish the person absolutely must include rubber in the sexual experience otherwise they cannot be aroused.

Thank you for that simple explanation.

A lot of people regard kinks as fetishes it seems.

Good luck with that. There might be some community somewhere that is into this but you might have to use tor as they are hardly likely to be on the clearnet😂

I've been involved with the fetish scene (that's what it tends to be called) and have never heard this definition of a fetish and a kink before, most of us would just've meant kink by this definition. Same goes for Fetlife, by the definition here it should mostly be called Kinklife :) But it does make sense as a distinction, it's worth having as a way of differentiating those capable and incapable of also/alternatively having a normal sexual relationship.

What's a sub?