Ladies, do you think guys watching any kind of porn is a red flag?

[Blondieturtle]

I'm starting to wonder if guys watching porn is a red flag completely. This idea is getting more and more popular among women, and for those of you who have been with men who don't watch it at all, is there a noticeable difference in how they treat you as compared to other men?
There are just so many videos out there that condone abuse and pedo like tendencies and I feel like it's highly unlikely that a guy who watches it hasn't gotten off on these kinds of videos. Words like young, teen, forced, rough, ect. in the tilte of videos are so common I feel. Plus I think it's extremely easy and common for guys to be obsessed with it. My ex 24 bf had a reddit account dedicated to porn and tons of vids and photos saved on his phone and laptop and it made me feel so icky! I had watched porn in the past but it was always a get in and get out thing, having anything saved just feels gross.
Ladies, Is it worth it to find a guy who never watches it or do you think it's possible for men to have a healthy relationship with it?

It's a no from me

No porn in our relationship

I like the odd bit of porn myself so no, not an issue for me.

So slapping and choking?

That is mainstream porn these days…

Underage isn't "extreme". It's child abuse.

Well duh, I'm obviously not talking about child porn. I'm talking young women over 18 who look like teens. "Underage" 🙄

How do you know how old they are?
Why is it ok to like porn that looks like child abuse?

I have said it's the opposite of ok, by putting it in the extreme category which would be a red flag. Nowhere have I supported it.

Yes.

My ex was porn addicted and porn sick. He used to watch it so often that he stopped being able to orgasm with me. He would try to coach me on my facial expressions, the way I walked and acted, all to emulate how women in porn acted.

He had collections of photographs which he tried to hide from me, which I always found. He made the kids sleep in the same bedroom (opposite sex) so he could turn the medium size room into a man cave where he would have his special man time. (To watch porn).

Yes it was an abusive relationship.

Yes I tried to leave him for years! (I did eventually).

Men who watch porn is a red flag yes.

My husband doesn't watch porn. He does however like reading stories. He loves stories written by women, from a woman's pov. He finds that more of a turn on. That is acceptable to me.

There is just so much violence, incest and pedo in porn. It isn't a fantasy. There are real life women being subjected to it. You may be watching revenge porn and not know it.

Men who get off on the type of porn out there these days is probably a closet misogynist and it is best to steer clear.

Its a red flag for me. I couldn't be with someone who watched porn.

Thats my (very strong) opinion and boundary. If a man does not agree, he is free to be with someone else. Its that simple.

I really have no respect for any man that I know watches porn. For all the reasons already stated by other posters.

It's basically orgasming over someone else
Why is that okay but not sexting isn't?

no. First who treated me well was my dp, he does watch porn sometimes.

I wouldn't have a man I knew did it. I'm Catholic so I think porn isn't good. If a bloke was into it he wouldn't be on the same page as me about a whole range of issues.

If orgasming "over someone else" is the same no matter the circumstances then by your logic, cheating in your partner is no different to fantasising about someone else when you masturbate. Surely you see the difference between these two scenarios....

And if you can see the difference between those, then you can surely understand that porn and sexting aren't identical in terms of being "unfaithful".

I quite like erotic literature, not fifty shades though, it's words on a screen or a piece of paper. There is a massive difference between reading the written word and someone being paid to act out a sexual act. It tends to be quite focused on female pleasure as well. So much of porn is hateful to women I'd assume the people who watch it quite like seeing a woman degrade herself.

Fantasising is a bit different- this is seeking out the use of someone else's body with the aim of orgasming over them
Not for me- if people accept it then that's their choice but not here

My husband doesn't watch porn. He does however like reading stories. He loves stories written by women, from a woman's pov. He finds that more of a turn on.

😂😂😂

I don’t understand @ghosthunter2022, what’s so funny about the person’s post?

Yes, it is, and it’s a dealbreaker. I don’t want the abuse of women to be considered acceptable wank material in this house.

I don't consider it cheating and have no issues with a partner watching it, as long as its ethically made and not tube site stuff.

Probably because it doesn't sound believable. The poster sounds quite naive and the use of the word stories instead of fiction makes it sound childish.

All men watch porn. Some are honest about it and some lie about it. Any woman who thinks otherwise is either ridiculously naive or in denial.

@IntentionalError · Today 19:03
''All men watch porn. Some are honest about it and some lie about it. Any woman who thinks otherwise is either ridiculously naive or in denial.''

So you think you are a spokesperson for an entire gender?

I've accidentally ruined porn for several people by asking them why watching people have sex on a screen is ok; but watching other people in real life in the same room would be voyeurism.

Assuming the people in the room know you’re there, what’s wrong with voyeurism?