Did anything awful ever happen to your ex? I feel guilty for being happy about it

[Retopa]

Something awful has happened to mine and my initial reaction was happiness. I hate myself for this and since I’ve reflected i do also feel sad it has happened. His is DC’s dad and that alone makes me feel terrible. He’s never met dc and gave me hell but honestly I was glad he is suffering. I’m a bitch for that, I know. Can’t tell anyone IRL!

I felt happy about a few bad things that have happened to xh. He was/is awful.
Like others say - karma. Why would I feel sorry for someone horrible?

Overall I'd say I'm a pretty decent person but as with most people there's room for improvement.

Both of my exes were awful and abusive. Bad things have happened to both of them.
I smile and get on with my day whenever a memory pops into my head.

How does something bad happening to your ex rectify the past or even make the present or future any better? I couldn't bring myself to rejoice at something bad happening to my worst enemy! That would never take away the pain they've caused me!

My ex wasn't abusive, but he really thought he was something special and was going to be famous. He was always stringing me along waiting for something better. His dad once bragged to me that girls would be all over him when he was a pro football player.
He is middle aged, single, has lost his looks and no- not famous.

You dont know what these women have been thorough.

My exH and Dds dad cheated while I was pregnant - the affair lasted a year before he disappeared. I don't wish him any harm and wouldn't be happy if anything happened to him as I wouldn't want my Dd to experience the loss of her dad at a young age, or for him to have a serious accident.

However, if it is an ex who had spent years abusing their partner physically and mentally and he had nothing to do with his DC, I can totally understand this feeling

I admit I used to be pleased when the football team he supported, lost.

@cherry2727 it doesn’t take away the pain but makes me feel he got a slice of what he caused me. It feels fleetingly good because i can reason he’s accountable in some way.

My Dgran used to read the Obituary section of the Hull Daily Mail religiously every night hoping to see that my Grandfather had died. He was onto his 4th wife by then.

I've heard recently from some mutual friends my ex had some sort of cancer, heart problems, had multiple surgeries, is not happy with his wife, drinking a lot and their child has health problems. I wasn't happy hearing about his problems but was happy I wasn't his wife and a mother of his child. I was going to marry him (childhood sweethearts). He was abusive and controlling.

My ex used to make fun of me when I was sick. Cheated on me with several women, lied like his life depended on it and then went out of his way to rub my nose in it when he set up home with the last one.

I'm not sorry he got covid and then long covid, just like he isnt sorry for what he did to me. I wouldnt wish it on him/anyone but I dont feel sorry for him either.

I must be the only one, but I was very upset to hear my ex died recently. He was my 1st love, we dated for 4 yrs and just grew apart. We kept in touch, and years later he came out and eventually married his partner. I was happy that he found love and had a good life.

Other ex's, I couldn't have cared less about.

Some of the people on this thread are no better than the ex’s they claim did them harm.

Seriously being glad someone hung themselves makes you a pretty vile person. §

It’s one thing being a bit smug that an ex has ended up single, but gloating at someone’s suicide is on another level.

Vile thread.**

@MayThe4th If that’s for me then I don’t give two shits. You know fuck all about other peoples lives

Unfortunately not. He made another woman's life hell, too. He just picked up where he left off with me. She got rid but fr all we know he could have found another victim - neither of us is in touch with him.

I don't think it's vile at all. I think it shows a certain lack of empathy if you can't understand why someone might be glad or relieved that their abuser is suffering.

Yep I was trapped in a situation for years and the only thing I could hope for was that these people die. They did not too long after and I could finally escape. There was no other way. Their enabling children were sad and all I could think was karma for what they all happily did to me. I never really understood how people could be happy about someone’s death, like when people rejoiced when saddam was killed etc but once you’re on the receiving end of horrible abuse you start to get it. Good to see lots of holier than thou people on here. Lucky you!

Mine also died. I’m not glad he’s dead. But I am immensely relieved that he is completely and permanently removed from our lives. He used me relentlessly as an audience and service human, then when I left, tried to break me, repeatedly. Neither DD or I need his malevolence. DD especially is better off knowing only his memory, which I can allow to be kinder to him that he deserves. I do feel incredibly sorry for his mother and although it’s been hard for DD to grow up without a father, it’s not as hard as it would be to grow up with him alive, but never visiting and flaking out or borrowing money. I’d be furious if he used her the way he used me, and I have no doubt he would have done exactly that.

He's currently spending his fourth night in hospital unable to shit - true! I always said he was full of crap

Slightly different here. Ex was very abusive(stabbed my dog, strangled me until I passed out etc etc) and for the longest time I wished him dead.
Then I realised that he believed that he was destined for greatness, considered himself the smartest, superior, most clever person in the room, but somehow life was not returning his greatness with rewards he craved. 3 ex wives, stagnant career, dc cut him off, good looks gone. Now I wish him a long, long life. I want everyday to have regret, old stories of his glory days, misery and unhappiness. They say, what goes around, comes around. I hope so.

No judgement from me, but I do find the concept of condemming people who cannot/ do not want to forgive stange

Forgiveness is truly a personal choice, there are many injustices in this world and life is cheap in many parts of our globe, in this instance of bad ex's, for some to not understand the level of abuse some women have experienced is patronising, many have died through the hands of very abusive men.

Evil does exist within some people and I believe they really do deserve some kind of retribution.

My ex applied to join the police force he wasn't allowed due to a caution for domestic violence against me, of course he blamed me

How would you feel about someone who punched your child in the stomach and called them a worthless, low life piece of shit?

I'll be throwing a party on the cunt's grave.

I make no bones of it. I’m an utter cunt of a woman at the best of times. No fake smiles from me just a bit of a resting bitch face and a volatile attitude problem. Can’t stand all this “be kind” shite. Be yourself. Say your piece and stand up for yourself.

But if your ex was an abusive prick who put you and/or your kids through hell, I think you'd be a saint if you heard he'd experienced misfortune and you didn't think he deserved it.

On the other hand, I don't believe in 'karma' in the way people usually use the word. Wasn't Stalin one of the biggest bastards of all time, and didn't he die peacefully in his own bed? So where was his bloody 'karma'?