Is this a red flag?

[pollyloo]

Iv been seeing a man for 6 months we met on tinder 🙊
He is lovely an we get on really well , laugh constant. We have had a few arguments early on but always been resolved, we both said we love each other after about 4months it's been very intense quite quickly which is fine we are long distance so I think this has added to it, however today he has had his son who's 5, and he has been throwing tantrums BF has called him a little cunt multiple times a few times on message and then once on voice note. It's really not sat right with me my children drive me mad and I lose my rag but I wouldn't even called them cunts?! I really see a future with this man but this is screaming red flag to me, what's everyone else's opinions please?

You need to ask?

Desperately awful.

Yes it is !!! What a horrible father

Never, ever see or speak to this man again

Run and don’t look back there’s children’s emotional safety involved and yours as well.

That's the thing though he seems a really lovely dad his little boy is quite hardwork not defending him because obvs iv posted! I don't know if I want to continue the relationship now after this as I have 3 children and think If he speaks about this about his own then what's it going to be like someone else's? I don't know if I'm over reacting though?

The first 6 months is the honeymoon period. He is now showing you who he is.

He's awful, I think the long distance is preventing you seeing what he is truly like and you've caught a glimpse of his nasty side.

Poor kid, and this would be an absolute deal breaker for me.
Stay away and protect your own children.

I'd get rid OP. This is not a good sign.

You are not over reacting, anyone who speaks about a child like that is not a good person. End of. Block him!

I have friends who refer to their children with nasty names (nothing as severe as cunt, and not to their children’s faces), and it has made me rethink my opinions of them. I would never want to be with someone who says this about their child, and I would fear them doing it to mine further down the line too.

I have some harsh things to say about my kids. Usually to my friends when I’m having a bad day. Never to my kids and I’ve never called them such a horrible word. I don’t know any one who would call their kid that and I wouldn’t be friends with anyone who did

Fucking hell, op, you really should not be questioning this. Think of your children, FGS. You want this kind of man in their lives?

He sounds like a right catch. Congratulations 🙄

It is a screaming red flag. Please don’t ignore it. Dump him.

Yes it's a red flag.

What an awful, awful thing to say. Huge red flag. Crazy you even have to ask.

He’s a shit father, end of story.

I would judge any woman harshly for staying with a man like that, if she knew how he spoke to and about his tiny child.

Definite no from me too. Using this language to a child is never acceptable. Also, if the child is difficult it could be that the father has something to do with it.

Your OP could be read two ways. Has he called the child that in front of the child, or just to you in messages?
If the former, totally unacceptable.
If the latter, it depends. I call my DS a wee toerag/ratbag/monster/devil etc when speaking to my DH about him. He never hears me. It's jokey. I have a friend who uses 'cunt' in the way I use 'toerag'; she just doesn't see it as a particularly bad word. If she jokily called her children cunts in a message to me I wouldn't think anything of it. But she wouldn't ever say that to their faces though.

Give it a few months and he shall be calling you the same thing. Run...

He was with him walking home he can be heard crying in the back of the voicenote

It’s a red flag to me. I instantly lose respect for anyone who uses that word at all, let alone to or about a child.

Massive red banner.

Poor child.

Outrageous