CF Acquaintance turned up today despite refusing invite

[Grumpusaurus]

We live in a popular tourist destination and after numerous people took advantage of us, we nip it in the bud now. Most seem to follow the same script by contacting us out of the blue and mentioning that it would be so lovely to see us. I now answer in a very friendly manner that it has been years since we last heard from them and it would indeed be lovely to catch up over coffee in a nearby spot when they are in the area. This does tend to put an end to most of those potential CFs, however, one acquaintance pushed back and asked to stay with us at the beginning of September. I told her that this would not be possible, especially as we have a very tight deadline and will be working flat out to finish a commission. DH and I are self-employed craftspeople and sometimes we do work all day and most of the night to finish pieces and the DC stay at their grandparents during that last push. Not heard back from the acquaintance since July even though she clearly read my WhatsApp message.

The doorbell went this evening, I ignored it as DH and I were in the middle of working on our commission but someone kept pushing the bell. Our property is an L-shape so you can see from our workshop who is at the front door. CF acquaintance was standing there with a suitcase! DH is more of a people pleaser and while really cheesed off was about to answer the door till I told him no bloody way! He redeemed himself by immediately agreeing. The bell went a few more times and then got a flurry of WhatsApp messages, which I ignored. She eventually left after half an hour. I am almost bemused by the cheek of it but there is no way I am going to let anyone railroad me into being their free accommodation and greatly inconveniencing us, especially while we literally get up to work all hours and fall into bed. DH is fretting about her coming back but I told that we will just continue to ignore the doorbell. We have a back gate to a dirt track we can stealth like leave the property if she is holding a siege at the front door 😎 There are plenty of hotels and B&Bs in the area, albeit quite dear. Who does that! A rhetorical question but am just shocked by the cheek of just turning up after saying emphatically No!

Shit. I hope the OP is feeling suitably awful. That poor, poor woman. All she’s been through. You know, it makes you think, doesn’t it?

I know, right? OP & DH are both clearly talented creative types, so the very least they could offer to do is to paint CF like one of their French girls.

Oh, I feel such a fool now. I just naturally assumed we were referring to this Leo and this screen classic:

I'm crying 😂
imagine if they'd opened the door and she'd said that 😂😂😂

I don't know what I am enjoying more OP - the strength you had in not answering the door, not replying to whatsapps not EVEN telling mutual friend 'oh, did she not mention she pitched up here AFTER we said no we were busy, and tried to stay anyway...'...

Your self control is incredible, I bet you can eat just one jaffa cake too can't you #superwoman...

Or the dramatic and fantastically mythical situations some posters are determined to imagine for the CF at the heart of all this... I mean probably after she got up your drive way, both her legs fell off and a fox stole all her money... shes probably asleep in a ditch outside your gate, her car having been nicked by a marauding gang of lizards...

shes probably asleep in a ditch outside your gate, her car having been nicked by a marauding gang of lizards...

And you tell that to some of these soft, overindulged young MNers today.... and they just won't believe you.

Suddenly, a herd of doofuses enter the arena who come out with bizarre scenarios and weird justifications for blatant CFs

Love this image 😆

It's true that the lizards are menace if you leave your car unattended. What's more likely though is that she is the descendant of French royalty who had intended to claim her birthright and turn the French republic back into a monarchy. You can tell she's royal by the way she orders people around. She needed to be under cover at the OP's house (near Nice, or possibly St Tropez) for a few days while plans were set in motion. But because you didn't give her shelter she was captured and sent to the guillotine. France thanks you for your bravery OP, her cousins, who were hoping to ride her coattails to wealth and power, do not.

😂😂😂

Suddenly, a herd of doofuses enter the arena who come out with bizarre scenarios and weird justifications for blatant CFs

I think you posted this in entirely the wrong thread - there's a different one discussing Liz Truss and her new cabinet!

God, this thread is amusing and creative! 😂

All you Mumsnetters living in tourist hotspots need to get doorbells that will belt out the opening lines of McAlmont and Butler's classic, Yes. SO YOU WANNA KNOW ME NOW? 🎶🎵🎶

I do always wonder this too! If a CF reads something similar to what they've done and thinks "well that's perfectly normal and acceptable, what are they getting so upset about" ... then read the thread replies and think "whoops might have over stepped there!

I do always wonder this too! If a CF reads something similar to what they've done and thinks "well that's perfectly normal and acceptable, what are they getting so upset about" ... then read the thread replies and think "whoops might have over stepped there!

She was told NO in July. She ignored it and was relying on manipulating OP to let her stay.
Please read at least OP updates for correct info.

She’s been abducted by aliens & they are at this minute probing her most secret parts & ITS ALL YOUR FAULT

Maybe she accidentally married into a royal family and is trying to escape the men in grey suits.

She is probably having to take refuge in the Marbella Club.

It's astounding, the lengths people will go to in avoiding using ideal things exactly as they're intended. A financially-comfortable person deciding to go abroad on a holiday to a renowned very expensive place - clearly a well-planned luxury that everybody knows will not be cheap, all things considered; after all, you wouldn't think of planning to venture there in the first place if you couldn't fund it you'd go for a long weekend in Great Yarmouth instead.

It is Obvious Stuff 101 that you will need somewhere to stay for the duration whilst you're there, after you arrive at your exclusive destination. What amazing luck! There are several hotels to choose from, that exist solely to fulfil this specific purpose for you, which will be easily found and booked in advance online. But no, instead, you go to the effort of just turning up on spec, tracking down somebody you vaguely knew of years ago - who has expressly confirmed to you that they cannot accommodate you - hauling your suitcase to their front door, bashing their door down and then spamming them with ever more desperate demanding messages.

It just reminds me of the old joke about the rabbit who walks straight past the greengrocers and goes to the hardware store every single day to ask if they sell carrots!

Got any grapes?

Oh no @Gotmynewshoes We love that in this house but now it will be stuck in my head (again) all day. "Waddle waddle"!

Aren't the Sussexes in the country at the moment...?

@MeridianB I have damned myself to that same outcome. Bom bom bom bombadum...

Love how many great twists and turns this thread has taken!

It all went smoothly yesterday to my total relief. The haulier people were brilliant and super efficient. The clients chose them but I took their details for future projects as they were such a joy to deal with, especially after the last company we used, expected us to do all the heavy lifting and loading despite charging us a lot for that service. They were pleased with us too as we have large doors to the workshop that open entirely and we kept a clear path with clear and easy access and they could drive right up to it. Apparently, that isn’t the norm, as they did tell us some fascinating horror stories of other jobs.

We cleared up the entire workshop which is gleaming and ready for the next project and did a big overall clean-up. PIL brought the kids and dogs back and we had a lovely meal together. PIL were amused about the door stepper but not that surprised. MIL moved back to the area after her parents died and DH and I used to come over to help renovate the place. Once it was all done, they did have some CFs of their own who tried to visit. They fended them off by telling them they were more than welcome to stay but would need to spend quite a bit of the time digging their garden etc. Surprising enough no one was interested in that deal. We saw a sign for our property at one of our renovation trips to them.

Some of the posts made me think if DH and I have ever acted like such brazen Cfs and hand on heart we never did. We did a lot for friends that helped us with our renovation, in fact, it was a direct return of favours. Even back in the UK, we encountered a lot of CFs trying to rope us into renovating their properties for free and wised up to that quickly. A (former) good friend of DH never lent a hand but bought a fixer upper and expected us to do a lot of the renovating work for free. This was when we still worked on our own property, so the last thing we wanted to do was more hard physical graft. What really pissed us off is that the fiancee categorically refused to do any work on the house, as it wasn’t her thing. They also wanted to borrow our expensive tools. This happened quite a lot. DH and I invested in quality power tools whenever we did jobs and really looked after them. If you buy a renovation project, you need to budget for tools. We did lend a couple of things that came back in an appalling state, so we got very firm on that even with dear friends. There are plenty of tool hire places if you do not want to buy expensive equipment. We were not invited to the wedding of the former friend.

Anyway, the only thing that perhaps could be seen as CFuckery is PIL taking our kids and dogs for this past week and sometimes when we go to a short event. However, we did the bulk of their renovation and continue to lend a hand with things. But it isn’t such a purely reciprocal deal, as there is mutual adoration and respect. MIL wasn't a huge dog person but ever since spending time with mine is totally smitten with them. She kept saying how she is going to miss them laying next to her in their studio. FIL let slip that they have also snuck into their bed. They are thinking of adopting a galgo from Spain.

PS: No sign of CF. I think since we did not provide accommodation, she isn't going to waste any time getting in contact again. DH wonders if she might wait till after the deadline to try again, as would still save a big chunk for the remainder of her holiday. Now we aren't under any pressure and the stress is gone, I have zero problem to tell her to get off my property. Part of me is so tempted to call the police to say we have a prowler on our grounds... 😆

Shrunkenhead
None of your scenarios include an explanation of her asking three months ago if she could come and stay. How did she know she was going to be desperate?

An alternative explanation is, that she is not like you and does except people she doesn't know to provide accommodation for her.

Shrunkenhead came up with a few preposterous scenarios. It is hard to imagine anyone this utterly dense. Perhaps they like to derail a thread and are on a wind up. I fell for it further up but then noticed that they keep digging in with more ludicrous nonsense.