Most men give me the ick!

[Ceriane]

Can anyone else relate or is it just me?

"Gosh, am I the only one who thinks [insert popular opinion here?]"

Surely this is entirely normal?!

God I had the opposite! Perimenopause sent me into sexual overdrive, just walked around finding all sorts of men utterly shaggable! Have settled on extremely hot (imo) FWB till hormones settle down 😬

I'm 60 and have always found men unattractive, sadly I am not a lesbian.
Now I'm older I haven't seen one single man I'd like to kiss never mind anything else.
I just think they are dinosaurs and relics waiting to become extinct as the world moves on.

Yes, I'm 43 and have been OLD recently. It's rare to find an attractive man older than mid 40s. They seem to let themselves go more than women of the same age do.

I agree.
I'm married to a really good one but if I found myself single again I just don't think I'd bother with a relationship.
I'm a mum to a boy and we're making sure we're raising him to be one of the good ones.

I have a lot of great male friends but can still see why they give women the ick. They give me the ick but I'm gay, so of course they will.
I agree on patriarchy being a huge factor. Even the nice ones feel theyre entitled to have it all.

Have you ever considered, that perhaps you give most men the Ick?

That would be great. Maybe that would result in fewer instances of sexual harassment 🤷🏼‍♀️

There are very few men I fancy & the rare occasion I do, I'm usually put off by their personality/general attitude to women. 😄
Fortunately, I'm happy in my own company.

I think it’s mainly men from OLD that gives me the ick and seems to put me off men. I swipe almost relieved to have an excuse not to swipe right! However in real life I rarely to never fancy anyone. I’m late 30’s and I’m asking because I feel under an enormous amount of pressure from people and from society to have one, and I think if it wasn’t for that, I wouldn’t bother looking. I just can’t relate to women who obsess about them all the time, if it wasn’t for social expectation I would barely think about men. I’ve worried over the years about my lack of attraction, I would love to find genuine love with someone I’m really attracted to but I never am. I’m not a man hater (although OLD is making me feel very negatively about them) and also experiencing really pushy men in the past has really put me off. It seems to be only on mumsnet that it’s okay to not really want one, yet in real life I get pitied, grilled about my love life and seen as having failed in life because I’m on my own, seen as a problem to be solved! I just don’t get it.

Would be great wouldn't it

honkeytonkwoman38

Psuedo sickness.

@Ceriane

I was mid to late 30s when I entered the "online market" so to speak. It was absolutely shocking to begin with, but then I "aclimitized" to the situation and somehow managed to have two albeit (brief) relationships but neither worked out because we were at different life stages.

I wanted a child/family desperately and I think I was "fancying" the idea of some of these men more than the actual reality. To cut a long story short I had IVF and used a sperm donor to achieve my own family and as I mentioned in a previous post, after childbirth I seem to have lost my libido completely (post partum hormones slump??), or was I in the perimenopausal with raging hormones that made me see men in a different light??

Do you want children, and is the ick factor a serious barrier to meeting men with whom to have a family?

I don't know about the ick so much as feeling very irritable having to suffer mansplaining from most men I talk to and the attitude that they know best. About everything. It's insufferable.

Oh me too! I split up with my ex, 17 years ago and have stayed single ever since. I have dipped my toe into old a couple of times but deleted my profiles very quickly as the responses from the men really creeped me out. A couple of my friends have met really nice men but I just don't see that for me.

They might think that about women.

Tbh awful thread. . There’s shit people everywhere… gender isn’t always relevant.

@girlfriend44

That would explain why they beat, rape and murder us I guess

Plus the fucking boring mansplaining

Yep, I was chatting with a bloke online and he called me tonight. Gone right off him. U know how u need to be attracted to their voice too? Nothing like I was expecting. What he was saying was giving me the ick too. Basically most men follow the same patterns too.

They can think what they like, I don't give a shit.

I'm generally very disappointed in men - have had a few great men in my life but most are underwhelming, very entitled and have an attitude that women exist for their pleasure.

I've found many to be quite simple, often dull and bad conversationalists. They have a false sense of importance and although I've worked with very competent men, many more are winging it but very assured in their value.

I can only assume all of this is how we socialise men and how we reward them. It's sad.

I mostly ignore them at this point in my life. lAlso most men at my age really look shagged out and I've noticed have really neglected their teeth and skin. Not good.

I think women are far more choosy than men. It's a natural selection thing. Men can sow their seed far, women only have a limited number of children they can raise alone (if need be) so need to be choosy about whose genes they are taking on. You are the prize! They must compete. I think this is why many men start going on about their achievements to women they think they might be in with. Most women can see it a mile off and it's definitely off putting.
We want capable men but we don't want them to brag openly about their capabilities.
Similarly men are evolved to be attracted towards women who would be good at bearing and raising children, big hips and breasts help towards this as well as a maternal, caring attitude. However, we hate men going on about our tits and arses and don't want them to expect us to cook/clean/look after the kids alone etc.
Its a no-win situation!!
It's a minefield for certain men!
I guess that's why it's always just been easier to make sure we are dependent on them - then all the ick in the world means we can't go anywhere.
Shame that's not working anymore! 😆

For a long time I had only slept with one man. We met, got engaged, married the lot... then things changed. I met other men and u have this feeling u might have missed out on something but nope. I've since slept with 6 other men. Not one of those has made me cum, they were all selfish and clueless. One was very attractive to look at, and visually everything I fancy in a man but absolute bore, fuck up at life, was always trying to bum money off me and to top it off ghosted me and left me with clymidia. Now I just find men a bit meh tbh. I remember him going on a drive with me and saying oh nice house to some big place and I looked at him and thought u can't even afford your £100 a week rent u coke head fuck off! Pathetic. I'm trying to raise my 3 sons better.

I have 3 sons but still feel men are generally arseholes. I just hope mine are better

When everybody else is suddenly the problem, chances are it's your problem not theirs.