Divorce financial settlement

[Omgitsme]

Hello

I am getting divorced and need to come to a financial agreement

After people's thoughts

We have two kids, 6 and 12 (boy girl)
I am the main breadwinner £39000
House worth £280000 ‐ mortgage left £85000
I am male
Pension £80000

My wife

Currently does not work, though might be getting a job (will be less a lot less than me)

Quit her job as she found it to stressful (agrued with staff there)
There is nothing stopping her from getting a better job, I can work childcare around it

Pension £0

She is instigating the divorce

Kids will live with me,
I will live in the marital home with them

She will visit most days for dinner and have kids eow

I was not planning on pursuing childmaintenance

What would be a fair financial settlement?

I don't think you can afford court unless you represent yourselves

Hi there looking for advice. In process of divorce 2 young children (at school).
Financially Im not in greatest position small income currently from self employment and uc but managed to buy ex out of family home (with large mgage) with family help. To me at the time this seemed best option as kids been through a lot of upheaval already and affecting oldest behaviour wise. There was also pressure of us losing the house completely due to exs debts (had a habit of going off on his own buying expensive things).
So, now I'm in family home (very modest) and ex got roughly 35% equity left in it less than he would have got had house sold at market value. My equity remains in the house.
He wants to use most of this to pay off debts and then buy his own home. He has a good job. Exact income undisclosed.
We are yet to go through financial settlement but because he was generous with home equity he does not want to contribute maintenance or pension and no shares either which he also has. He also has a few other valuable assets but apparently he owes money on them .
Childcare he sees one child once a week with stay over but sometimes no times a week and other child he sees one evening with stay but drop off at mine and every other weekend...
This would be easier if I knew exactly where i stood with his finances but he's never been open that way.
Together app 10 years but married about 4 excluding separation.
Thoughts welcome as to what would be fair

Oops sorry op meant to post that on a new thread!

Classic example, if the sexes in this case were the other way round, everyone would be saying don't give the lazy good for nothing a penny! There's obviously more to this than first appears, at least I'd bet a pound to a penny as such.

I went through this a couple of years back. The judge wanted a clean break, no I pay you more when children are this big. I had to remortgage and pay my ex out. He had to have enough for a house deposit + his salary to house the kids also. He did get less equity as he was a higher earner. He kept his pension and savings etc so was pretty 60/40 really. I am the resident parent with him eow. No way would I be putting ideas on the table about spending dinner times together, this will not pass in court.

She does though need to work, it’s not acceptable unless physically incapable to not do this to increase her capital and ability to have the children . It won’t go down well with a judge. I have a health condition which means I struggle but still was expected to do what I can (I work 20 hrs), he was not liable for my life after divorce.