Shared a bed with married colleague…

[Bueno89]

I started a new job a few months ago and found myself to gravitate towards a more senior married male colleague at monthly post-work drinks - we had a lot of banter.

Fast forward to last week where we’re attending an exhibition for the company and I get stuck with a colleague me and the more senior colleague have a mutual dislike for in the evening - the more senior colleague then invites me back to his hotel to have dinner with him to ‘rescue’ me. I get an Uber to the station to get my train home but I missed my train and the hotel my colleague was staying in had no rooms left available. He insisted he would sleep on the floor and I could have the bed so we did that and just spent ages chatting. However, he then got uncomfortable so joined me on the bed.

it got touchy so he brought up that it was crossing a line as both work and the fact he is married with kids and I’m in a long term relationship. We discussed we had both thought about it but he said he didn’t think it would ever happen as I was ‘young and hot’ and because of our relationships. We ended up kissing and a lot of touching but I stopped it going further and explained aside from morally, I also didn’t want to ruin our working relationship. I asked if he would feel guilty after and he didn’t know but said he just knew it would be really good.

I insisted we shouldn’t despite attempts and then in the morning I ended up doing engaging in foreplay. We then didn’t really talk about it until he left and said it wouldn’t be weird at work etc. he then hugged me and said to let him know I had got home.

We’ve messaged back and forth a little in Teams at work but haven’t discussed what happened. It’s still jokey but I feel awkward that things won’t be the same when we’re back in the office. He hasn’t increased how often we chat or changed his demeanour.

The worst part is that I have no regret as to what happened and feel like I wish I had let it go further. I can’t stop thinking about it and don’t know if I should bring it up when I next see him. He hasn’t said anything, but I don’t know if it’s because I insisted on it not happening so he thinks there’s no chance or it might make me uncomfortable, or if he just regrets it? I don’t know if it was an ego boost or if he would ever want more.

How romantic, the missed train, no hotel rooms left...there really was no other choice. It’s fate, the stars aligned. It’s beautiful. 🙃

Sounds like you’re well well suited. Lying, cheating, deceitful, selfish and thick. Ew.

I dont think OP will be back to be honest.

Ugh. He’s successful and sleazy, you’re junior and dumb. Both of you are happy to ruin his kids lives and crush his wife because you’re feeling horny. This is all SUCH A CLICHE.

Stay away from him if you have any integrity at all.

Maybe not. But, often people that love the excitement of an affair seek attention and drama elsewhere in their lives too. It doesn’t matter if it’s negative attention as long as it’s all about them.

So she may well be back I mean, or at least reading the replies and loving the controversy. 🙄

As someone who's been in the exact same situation and done that i am telling you to end it right now as this would be the biggest regret in your life!! Change jobs and forget about it, put it in your past and never turn back!

But you are "young & hot", & have no regrets ... hurrah! Sounds like everything has gone swimmingly for you.

Except that's not quite true is it OP? Your are bitterly regretting the fact that your sleazy unoriginal chancer boss hasn't "changed his demeanor" to you in the office.
You need to get that sorted, & pronto.

A breathy encounter in the stationery cupboard should do it. Also, make sure to stake your claim by slapping his arse breezily where colleagues can accidentally oversee you. Start adjusting his tie before he enters the boardroom, & make sure you are seen behaving inapproproately in his car at lunchtime after "popping out for a sandwich" together.

If this doesn't expedite matters for your speedily enough, befriend his wife on social media & start dropping little hints. Or call round at his house when he's out, & say you're sorry to bother her, but has she found your handbag, as you left it there by mistake when her husband asked you to 'drop off some paperwork' a day or so ago .... that should do it.

Go for the win OP! - he's a real catch, his wife is old & boring & he's only staying for the kids - who will soon love you more than their hausfrau mother, & vote you stepmum of the year.

You'll not only be the envy of your team mates, you're likely to get fast-tracked for promotion. This is a precious time OP - everything you want is within your grasp. Don't fuck it up by getting coy now.

I wonder how often he tries it on with new staff and how many have left or transferred afterwards.

You need to end your relationship and let your partner find someone who’s not wriggling about in bed with another man and I hope your boss’s wife finds out and divorces the creep.

Sounds like Brief Encounter- not.

I agree this has to be a joke, just something to try to stir up a reaction which is pretty pathetic to be honest.

If its not a joke then its hilarious that someone is this naive.

Did ye, aye.
weird that your boyfriends a woman who got fingered by her boss 😂minging🤣🤣🤣

*wants a woman

the more senior colleague then invites me back to his hotel to have dinner with him to ‘rescue’ me. I get an Uber to the station to get my train home but I missed my train and the hotel my colleague was staying in had no rooms left available

Sooooo... Leaving aside the rather dubious fact that apparently, you were at an exhibition for work and the company booked a hotel for your boss while you were expected to return home by train that evening, what on earth made you return to the very hotel your boss was staying in when you realised you'd missed your train? Was there only one hotel in the whole town? And how did your boss even discover the predicament you found yourself in?

Do Easter holidays work the same way as half term??

Sounds like it was your ego boost. Really it's despicable behaviour from both of you. You deserve each other.

The more I read of this, the more I think OP wants to be the next Mills and Boon writer.

You almost fell on his d*ck but didn't. Move on.

What a grubby, boring cliché.

Oh, and stop the naïve ingenue act ("Oh, I don't know how this could have happened!"). It's not convincing, and makes you look pretty thick.

My first thought, reading how he's behaved after the fact, and during, is that he's done this before.

Sorry, her missing her train, which was entirely her responsibility to catch, was somehow his fault and planned?? Mind. Blown.

Gross. Both of you.

Think of the hurt you are causing your partners and the poor children children involved. Honestly, do you not realise how completely devastating affairs are on families??

Ah, but it just happened, dontcha know... The poor man didn't want to sleep on the floor, and OP just couldn't help herself...

Do you know what OP - I’ve been in a similar situation. Hotel had fucked up and my room wasn’t booked, there was no where else about and it was very late.

I went up to my married colleagues room (I was in a LTR) and do you know what happened?

NOTHING

because he wasn’t a sleazy bastard and I’m not a skank!

My inner Nan is bubbling up.

Yuck. What have I just read? OP and man you're both vile. I hope in the future when you're all married and at home looking after the kids, your husband 'just' spends the night with some silly little woman engaging in foreplay because the silly little woman feel for his sleazeball moves. Hook, line and sinker.

Oh and btw this man is well practiced. It's a game. You're not the first nor the last.

I mean carry on playing his little game whilst the rest of the office smirks. Or you could grow up.