We moved abroad several years ago. Me and the kids are settled but DH really struggled with homesickness after the move and was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. He has been on antidepressants and had regular psychology ever since and, although it has been up and down, I believed that the trend was slow improvement. He has found hobbies here, has made new friends, has a job he likes better.
The homesickness has done a huge amount of damage to our marriage. We have been together a long time, much longer than the last few years abroad, but this has definitely been our biggest unresolved conflict to date.
The other night we were having A Talk about other much more minor relationship crap, just the usual. As is quite common, he short circuited straight to "Well, everything would be so much better if we just went home." Then, he shocked me with: "Of course I'll never be happy, I've ruined the rest of my life."
Look, he's been a misery to live with for a lot of the time since we got here. I just continue to assume that he will settle in the end. But sometimes, in different circumstances, people on here say "When someone tells you who they are, listen". Would you see his comment as a red flag?