Online dating - i hate the great outdoors

[Nothappyatwork]

Every bloody profile I meet online seems to be detailing about how they love to get on the bike and go up a mountain they love to walk up a mountain to kayak down the mountain they are looking forward to jumping in a campervan and setting off to see the world they like to travel these people have like commitments and mortgages and like children they see at the weekend ?
The mind boggles.
In the UK it’s permanently fricking pissing down even during the summer when you get into the sticks where anything is vaguely green.

Obviously I wouldn’t mind a hike if we lived in Peru or somewhere less grey.

Are they all having a different kind of midlife crisis what happened to buying a Porsche and whipping me off to 5 star hotels ?

I do loads of outdoor stuff and have loads of friends that do too.

However, the guys that mentioned it on online dating usually turned out to be lying and the furthest they walked was to the pub

There are definitely lots of men out there who look like they don’t do much beyond walk to the pub and sit on the sofa watching Netflix - probably more than claim to enjoy hiking and running tbh.

I don’t think it’s especially mind boggling that people find time to be active, it’s about priorities. In summer when it’s light until after 10pm that gives plenty of time to get an outdoor activity in after work - DP and I often head out of London to trail run on Box Hill or the South Downs.

I’m not surprised that they find the time to be active if it just blows my mind that they seem to be so active and yet so fat in many of the cases.

I guess it’s the ones that apparently love to travel or did I get more than 28 days a year annual leave ? And the ones that want to buy a campervan and piss off into the wilderness again this country isn’t really set up for that is it ? Why do they think women want to sleep in a tent with no washing facilities…. naturally we will be required to have a hair straightened, nails look beautiful with our fannies waxed whilst putting up with this Bear Grills lifestyle

In my experience they don't. They say there are into hiking etc. to make themselves look more interesting . Usually they prefer to be in the pub watching football or glued to the sofa talking about it. Most of them would not have a clue on how to get up a mountain.

Plenty of people in the UK have a campervan and use it here - I do. Plenty of women enjoy camping. Plenty of men like a woman who’s happier in Hunters and a raincoat than false nails and immaculate hair. Obviously it’s not for you, but I do a lot of trail ultra running events and there are always lots of women - both on their own or with their OH. 28 days is basically six weeks of holiday time - do you not travel much?

Perhaps some of these men are lying, but I don’t find it unusual, I know lots of people of both sexes who could write truthful OLD profiles containing all of the things you’ve mentioned.

@ComtesseDeSpair - i’m a single mum with one child I earn 70 grand a year and no I can’t afford to go travelling much. Completely aside of that as a say these people claim to have children, do they not spend their holidays with them then ?
Maybe I’m naive and I believe everything written down on a profile but honestly I was just like looking at it thinking who are these people ?

I think it’s still relatively rare for care to be shared 50/50 after divorce - you’ll probably find most of these men have their DC every other weekend and a couple of weeks in the school summer holidays, which still leaves plenty of time for leisure.

I’ve no idea whether they’re being honest or not, just saying that I know enough people who do enjoy the outdoors in the UK that it wouldn’t strike me as boggling or untrue. They just aren’t your people!

I know what you mean. Nothing like a man on OLD with his Cycling outfit and sunglasses on so you can’t see his (married) face or that lovely one in a vest holding a foot long fish.

I've definitely seen the same and friends have as well. Everyone wants to snowboard, ski, hike, "travel the world". And that's really cool of course but those aren't my priorities at the moment and I would like to be in a relationship with someone who is happy being settled but also enjoys a holiday that doesn't involve going away for weeks (or months!) at a time.

As I say I might be being incredibly naive but I just fail to see where if they’re being honest and these pursuits are part of their regular existence and within their budget and time allowances, a female would fit into their lives without basically having to turn into the female version of them which, again I don’t know anybody who genuinely does enjoy these hobbies. All just smacks of the midlife crisis I’m going to do what the fuck I want and you’ll be required to fit it in despite the fact that the previous wife clearly wasn’t interested and didn’t want to fit in, theyve not really moved on or learnt anything from that experience have they ? I don’t know maybe I’m not explaining it very well but I just find it all a bit strange.

From my experience, these types fall into two categories. Most prominent are those that do very little generally, but sell themselves as active beings. These ones tend to end up disappointingly lazy. Second, the true obsessives! Who amaze you with their energy and endless desire to climb mountains, kayak down white water and seemingly be invincible. So take it with a pinch of salt.
Ultimately the majority of people, male and female, are (hopefully) busy working/looking after kids/living a life, and tend towards sitting on the sofa watching nonsense most evenings.

As a female teacher of Outdoor education I am a little offended by your hair straighteners and nail polish post 🤣

I think I’d be highly disappointed by the guys on OLD who claim to be outdoorsy

If I earned £70k I would certainly go travelling a lot more than I do now ! And I love the outdoors . Sounds like you need to look on different websites for the kind of guy you want .sounds a bit Boring tbh

@Annoy - I think you’d be truly devastated I really do

One of my male friends is really into the biking/climbing outdoors, only mentions it briefly in his profile. The men going on about it are lying. They do really want to be mountain climbing love gods though!

[quote Nothappyatwork]@Annoy - I think you’d be truly devastated I really do[/quote]
🤣🙈

Similar to what an op said above… although I’m mad passionate enough about the outdoors to make a living from it. I also love nothing more than lounging around and watching Netflix, eating crap 😀

I had hiking on my profile when I was online dating and I do actually hike most weekends... I also have a number of friends, male and female, who own campers and use them regularly.

However I also have a friend who has hiking on her profile and she literally has never hiked beyond one team event at work. I guess she thinks it makes her interesting. She's had it on her profile for so long that I'm pretty sure she's convinced herself she loves it!

@Crimeismymiddlename

One of my male friends is really into the biking/climbing outdoors, only mentions it briefly in his profile. The men going on about it are lying. They do really want to be mountain climbing love gods though!

I live in the Lake District and I live driving through Bowness/ Ambleside and seeing people togged up to the nines in fancy expensive outdoor gear… but they’re in a town, with shopping bags and Costa coffees in their hands 🤣

They are out there OP. I met my OH on pof and was partly attracted to the fact he said he hates camping! And he does now drive a porsche

Mid life crisis seems to have shifted from expensive cars to expensive outdoor gear
How much they do / enjoy vs what they say… that’s a different question
For reference I know several families that are really outdoorsy - where both parents love climbing, mountain biking, hiking and once the kids appeared they just slotted in

@Cloverforever - You’ve given me Hope my darling thank you

@skgnome

Mid life crisis seems to have shifted from expensive cars to expensive outdoor gear How much they do / enjoy vs what they say… that’s a different question For reference I know several families that are really outdoorsy - where both parents love climbing, mountain biking, hiking and once the kids appeared they just slotted in

The vw transporter is the new Porsche

Maybe they take their children with them? We hike and do long runs and bike rides etc and take my ds with us.

What's wrong with outdoor activities.

I go running regularly and have got into hiking. Neither are massively expensive. A pair of running shoes or hiking boots and maybe a couple of hours in the car.

I have my kids at weekends. Every other weekend with a bit extra on top.

You earn 70k at year and this is beyond your means. Presumably you live on Mayfair??

No mid life crisis for me. But I'm not ready to be a fuddy duddy being nagged to death, I'm only 41. That can wait another ten years at least

@rainbowandglitter

Maybe they take their children with them? We hike and do long runs and bike rides etc and take my ds with us.

But I certainly hope they’re not planning to take their DS or DD with them on a bloody online date though.