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Original poster

Online dating - i hate the great outdoors

153 replies

Nothappyatwork · 28/03/2022 19:59

Every bloody profile I meet online seems to be detailing about how they love to get on the bike and go up a mountain they love to walk up a mountain to kayak down the mountain they are looking forward to jumping in a campervan and setting off to see the world they like to travel these people have like commitments and mortgages and like children they see at the weekend ?
The mind boggles.
In the UK it’s permanently fricking pissing down even during the summer when you get into the sticks where anything is vaguely green.

Obviously I wouldn’t mind a hike if we lived in Peru or somewhere less grey.

Are they all having a different kind of midlife crisis what happened to buying a Porsche and whipping me off to 5 star hotels ?

OP posts:

Patented · 28/03/2022 21:11

It's clearly.not permanently.pissing down when the UK has been blanket covered by sun and warmth these past days. But hey, continue the boring and unimaginative old lazy narrative about how it rains every day (really doesn't!)

Original poster

Nothappyatwork · 28/03/2022 21:16

It was beautiful and sunny here today having piss down all weekend

OP posts:

Undecicive · 28/03/2022 21:19

It's got to be the female equivalent of 'love skiing' then you meat them in person and she's been skiing 10+ years ago, hurt her knee and can't ski any more. (Husbands' friend experience.)
I'm sure my husband also said something about outdoors... I can't even get him to put the bloody bins out.

Undecicive · 28/03/2022 21:20

@Patented

True enough. It's only pissing down and cold in August. 😀

Katya213 · 28/03/2022 21:21

OP, most of them are talking out of their arses.

phizog · 28/03/2022 21:25

Not sure what age bracket this is, but every time i go hiking in the UK, there are loads of men and women and families out and about. So it's definitely very common - weather doesn't put off people who genuinely love the outdoors. But yes, it's likely some have it on there just to portray themselves as more active/interesting than they really are. I suppose the only way to find out is asking how often they go/where they last went. I do tend to focus on how active a man is, so it matches my lifestyle, and I did it with my parents as a child, so it's just a way of life for me. My holidays are always active holidays, as I get too bored with beach hols.

But I can very quickly weed out guys who are genuinely doing the hobbies, vs those who are blatantly lying.

People who ski/snowboard do tend to be a bit fanatical about the annual ski trip - I'm not a big fan of skiing so try to avoid people who do snow sports. However, I really fancied my bf and even though he did mention on his profile he loved skiing, agreed to a date. Hoped he'd exaggerated it. Turns out he was deadly serious. But we're still together after 2 years, he's tried my hobbies that he'd never done before. I went skiing and enjoyed it more than I have previously. So sometimes it's good to take a punt on a person as you never know how well you may get on!

Fupoffyagrasshole · 28/03/2022 21:28

You can still travel even when you have children op! We are taking our 1 year old on a 3 month long backpacking trip soon.

Maybe these men take their kids camping and kayaking ? It’s not that unusual really To get out of the house with your kids

Guess it’s what your priorities in life are I guess

But you probably sound super boring to a lot of people if you don’t want to do any of these things - and all these people are not for you 😂😂

AlternativelyWired · 28/03/2022 21:28

If you are being matched up with outdoorsy types and you are not into that then something is going wrong somewhere. Maybe try a difference site.
I'm very nosy and would love to know where your £70k goes. I have 3dc and am on benefits although I work part time too and we are out and about locally whenever it is nice (which is often despite being technically within greater Manchester). We get the train to the beach or the Peak District, Lake District, Oxford, Liverpool, York, North Wales, and more locally too. My

AlternativelyWired · 28/03/2022 21:33

Grrr hit post by accident.
My income is £25k including benefits and although we don't go abroad we do plenty within a 4hour public transport distance. I can't imagine having £70k and one child and NOT travelling further afield. I bet you drive and have a car. I don't. I'd be venturing much further afield if I had the luxury of a car.

I agree with the men on OLD though. MAMILs or beer swiggers in football tops with big groups of mates or a fish.

Octomore · 28/03/2022 21:41

I don’t know anybody who genuinely does enjoy these hobbies.

You must have a very limited social circle, as enjoying hiking isn't exactly niche.

Octomore · 28/03/2022 21:42

And yes, £70k is enough income to enable plenty of travel and adventure possibilities, both in the UK and further afield

GinInATina · 28/03/2022 21:46

I was married to someone who loved the great outdoors, cycling, kayaking, climbing, camping, gliding. I divorced him. He'll be out there OP .

As I grew older I wanted a walk (hills are fine) with a roaring pub fire, good food and wine at the end of it, comfy bed, not a bloody tent.

Wired, very similar income to OP here, goes on house/bills/cleaner/car/extra curricular/my hobbies with a few weekends away each year and a ten day holiday once a year.

Far flung days out don't happen here there and everywhere because I need a break after being out of the house 45-50 hours a week.

You're braver than me OP, I've been on my own for three years and can't face online dating.

RantyAunty · 28/03/2022 22:03

I would treat their profiles as mostly fiction.
Not too many will admit the most walking they do is from the sofa to the fridge.

WrigglyDonCat · 28/03/2022 22:07

To put your mind at ease (well, I'm not sure it will, but it's another perspective), it's no better for us blokes. You'd be amazed how many late 40s/early 50s women apparently spend every waking hour running, hiking, and the real bete noire, paddle boarding. In between all these activities, they travel the world, eat out every night, go to gigs, visit art galleries, museums, meet up with friends and family. write novels and build and paint life size replicas of the Sistene chapel. All done of course with perfect makeup, heels and a dress giving you all the mobility of Harry Houdini in a straitjacket.

I can't help feeling that there are a fair few puddings out there made with a fuck load of eggs...

WhoIsCraz · 28/03/2022 22:16

@Cloverforever

They are out there OP. I met my OH on pof and was partly attracted to the fact he said he hates camping! And he does now drive a porsche

He drives a Porsche? Oh he must be a real catch - do you realise how ridiculous and shallow that comment is?

Sailorsusan · 28/03/2022 22:16

I agree OP. When I was dating in my twenties it mainly involved pubs. Even my outdoorsiest friends don't really go on about it.

Also when does a walk become a hike?

LightSpeeds · 28/03/2022 22:16

I'm just about to jump back into OLD and am also stressing about this. I'm not spending my spare time hiking or cycling or camping so that will potentially rule out a lot of matches for me.

I think a lot of blokes do have the time and money for this type of thing - especially if they have no children or only see their children a few times a week. And I think many women are more 'tied down' with their commitments (children).

Good luck (to both of us)...

WhoIsCraz · 28/03/2022 22:22

OP what is this thing with Porsches?

Margotshypotheticaldog · 28/03/2022 22:29

I thought the pps reference to husband's porche was her indicating his mid life crisis....
Not the point of the thread, but don't dismiss the fish guy. The nicest kindest loveliest bloke I ever should have married is fish guy. I've mentioned it on here ( ad nauseum) before.

Margotshypotheticaldog · 28/03/2022 22:30

*Porsche

housemaus · 28/03/2022 22:34

@Nothappyatwork

As I say I might be being incredibly naive but I just fail to see where if they’re being honest and these pursuits are part of their regular existence and within their budget and time allowances, a female would fit into their lives without basically having to turn into the female version of them which, again I don’t know anybody who genuinely does enjoy these hobbies. All just smacks of the midlife crisis I’m going to do what the fuck I want and you’ll be required to fit it in despite the fact that the previous wife clearly wasn’t interested and didn’t want to fit in, theyve not really moved on or learnt anything from that experience have they ? I don’t know maybe I’m not explaining it very well but I just find it all a bit strange.

You don't know anyone who has outdoorsy hobbies, you think camping and walking are signs of a midlife crisis, and you think men who like being outdoors have all got ex-wives who apparently got sick of their love of the outdoors and they should learn from the experience??

I think it might be you being a bit strange here, tbh. Walking and camping and travelling in a camper van are all fairly normal hobbies and don't (to my mind, anyway!) indicate a man who's going to bully his partner into doing what he wants... at the same time, why would they event want to date someone who was more into Porsches and 5* hotels? They'd want to date someone with similar interests so they could enjoy it together. So yes, even if they did have an ex who wasn't into their hobbies, they certainly have learned from the experience by being clear about what they're into from the start...

Why do they think women want to sleep in a tent with no washing facilities…. naturally we will be required to have a hair straightened, nails look beautiful with our fannies waxed whilst putting up with this Bear Grills lifestyle

I love sleeping in a tent and DH couldn't give a shit whether my hair was straight (or the rest!). And this country/the UK is bloody gorgeous in a campervan, you should give the north coast 500 a go ;)

WhoIsCraz · 28/03/2022 22:35

That’s my opinion, Porsche drivers are the middle aged balding men with a self esteem problem (or huge ego). Not a turn on! Whatever spins your prop though, some are clearly impressed by it 🤣🤣

gogohm · 28/03/2022 22:37

I think you are being a bit disingenuous. I know single men who do do these things, and I had it on my profile too! It was true. Just got back from camping and yes I'm in the U.K.. but I do have curly hair and I don't wear makeup!

Hawkins001 · 28/03/2022 22:43

@Nothappyatwork

Every bloody profile I meet online seems to be detailing about how they love to get on the bike and go up a mountain they love to walk up a mountain to kayak down the mountain they are looking forward to jumping in a campervan and setting off to see the world they like to travel these people have like commitments and mortgages and like children they see at the weekend ? The mind boggles. In the UK it’s permanently fricking pissing down even during the summer when you get into the sticks where anything is vaguely green. Obviously I wouldn’t mind a hike if we lived in Peru or somewhere less grey. Are they all having a different kind of midlife crisis what happened to buying a Porsche and whipping me off to 5 star hotels ?

Because then the hotels would just seem to be focused on one aspect, I'm a mix, I love nature the woodlands ect for photography, then I also like cafes, hotels if I had the £ for the luxury and architecture of them to photograph, museums, galleries ect, central park new York, I like the outdoors for a bit, mainly while it's nice weather and some great photography, otherwise it's more educational aspects of museums, ect. It's a mix really.

Avocadobacardi · 28/03/2022 22:53

I’m with you OP. I can’t think of anything l would like less than a hike and a night in a camper van. Call me shallow but a nice meal, a drive to a country pub with a stroll or a trip to an exhibition much more likely to float my boat than a hike in crappy or even not so crappy weather. Luckily, like you I don’t know anyone who hikes and camps, closest they get is dropping off kids for DofE. Not a draw for me at all.

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