12yo revealed this *(Content warning: concerns child sex abuse)

[nousernameno]

My niece confided in me yesterday and said something which has made me very angry.

She said that when she was slightly younger (7-8), My SIL used to take her to her room, strip in front of her and ask her touch her breasts. She had done this on many occasions until my niece had asked why she is making her do this and she doesn't want to do it.

My niece never revealed this to us as she said she was told to keep it a secret and she thought her mum would be angry her if she told her mum.

I'm not sure how to approach this situation but clearly she has been exposed to things she shouldn't have been as a child.

Her mum is reluctant to confront the person responsible as it's family but it's driving me nuts

Was it definitely only breast being touched, is your neice sure nothing else happened?
Children can block out aspects of CSA.

Does your SIL have children of her own?

I'm not too sure. I didn't want to put words in her mouth but this is all she said.

@Linguini

Does your SIL have children of her own?

Even at the time she did. My niece said she would lock herself and not let her little boy come in.

Please ensure that your SIL is exposed for this behaviour. You cant change what has happened but you can support your niece now and show that she is protected and believed. Don't double the damage by burying this.

What she has told you, locking the doors, undressing and asking for inappropriate touching is enough to raise huge alarm bells whether or not anything else happened. There's a chance your neice could be minimising what's gone on, and a chance other children were also at risk.

I'm so sorry. This must be heartbreaking for you all.

What do you think you're going to do? I presume you'll have limited contact at least. What about your own children if you have any?

Never mind what her mum says - she's disclosed it to you, she's looking to see how you react. Stand up for her, make it clear that this was utterly unacceptable, and challenge your pervert SIL. Ring NSPCC for advice on what to do: 0808 800 5000

Cohesive sexual abuse. I’d report & support.

I am sorry but you need to refer this too the police urgently and ask for advice on how to proceed with concerns about child sexual abuse.
You need to forget about relationships and potential repercussions while you find out how to move forward.

These are apparently credible accounts of sexual abuse and grooming and your (and her mum's) first priority must be to safeguard your niece and any other children.
I'm sorry, this is likely to be a painful journey.

Forget approaching the SIL, speak again with your niece and her DP and contact the police.

I’d ring 101 for advice or, if you are concerned about going directly to the police, I’d contact the School Nurses to discuss safeguarding.

So is this sil your brothers wife? And the mum of the niece is your sister?

This is sexual abuse. Contact the police. They will investigate and also alert the relevant authorities.

Call the NSPCC for advice. Do not approach with the SIL

I don’t understand the relationships? Isn’t sil your nieces mum?

That aside, your niece has told you, she may have told you because she wants you to do something.
Maybe stuff is still going on, but she can’t tell you, so she’s telling you the past info in the hope that you with intervene.

Just report, don’t think about the wider family and the fall out.

What’s the relationship between the SIL and the niece? It seems it’s not her mum as you mention her separately. If you believe this is genuine, you must absolutely report it. It sounds highly disturbing. Your poor niece.

Well this is serious sexual abuse. What's the am I being unreasonable part?? Call the bloody nspcc and the police and tell them everything

Ring the police.

Do not speak about this with other relatives, do not approach the SIL. That will only give her time to cover her tracks as far as possible and make up stories before the police speak to her. You really ought to report this to the police immediately, it's a bloody serious crime. Any adult that is in the know about this and does not report is failing the girl.

Your voice has told you she's been sexually abused. The correct course of action is to ring the police.

niece

Tbh I'm worried you felt you even had to ask for advice. It should be so obvious to everyone that you don't worry about the adults in this situation.

Report to the police immediately. You have a duty to safeguard your niece.

@Iom92

Report to the police immediately. You have a duty to safeguard your niece.

This

You HAVE to report this! If its brushed under the carpet it would show to your niece that serious actions like this is OK and no concern.