Is it ever ok to track your partner's phone?

[spintailondonkey]

I did this when I suspected my ex. In my case, although the tracking threw up one suspicious tracing, and another where the phone appeared to be switched off when he went to a particular area, the tracking didn't actually help me. It was later, different evidence which emerged which confirmed my suspicions.

Some people will say that it is never ok to track someone, but what if you have really strong suspicions and you have asked your partner but they are not forthcoming about admission?

We all have find my iPhone, and the accounts are separate but linked in a family account to allow for shared iCloud storage, shared app purchases, etc.

Find my iPhone, for us, is predominately in case of phone losses - or actually misplaced within the house is most normal issue. You can then get the other person to make the phone ping so you can find it.

Technically we can track one another. It isn't something we do routinely though. Only time we use it if we are meeting the other person, or awaiting them, and they can't phone/message to update. But it would only be done if ore arranged.

So we could track one another but it isn't something we use very often.

*My husband never remembers to text me when he is leaving and obviously once he is driving, he can't text me, so I have no idea how close or far he is. Even if he did text me when leaving, the traffic is very variable.

I do need to know what time he will be home as we eat dinner together and then I go out to work or to run a youth club in the evening so I need to let them know if I will be late if he is running late. (Can't leave any earlier as the kids can't be left alone)*

Your husband holds down a job so presumably he’s a reasonably competent person. So he could make the effort to remember to text you to say he’s leaving. Or put a reminder into his phone to do so.
Dinner doesn’t have to be just ready the minute he arrives home. It could be ready and kept warm for some time, which would cover the ‘variable traffic’ scenario.

Ultimately it makes no difference to me whether or not you track your husband, but I’m just pointing out that your reasons for doing so could be managed by alternative means.

Ultimately it makes no difference to me whether or not you track your husband, but I’m just pointing out that your reasons for doing so could be managed by alternative means.
Yeah it could be, but the tracking is straightforward and works for both of us so why would I go for less effective methods?

Only with their promision.. would you like that done to you 🤔 if you don't trust him why be with him tracking him isn't going to prove nothing 100 percent

I have it on my phone and linked to my partner Google and he likes rhe idea if I am out in car and said I be home for 6 and its like 6.45 and can't get hold of me he can check stop him wondering and panicking

My husband has form for saying he's going out for one drink and will inevitably return at midnight.
I keep asking him to text me if he's planning to stay out longer but he never does.
He wouldn't be the type to text every time he was on his way home from somewhere. That would be too much faff for him.
So we have life 360. If it gets to 11pm and I check it and see that he's still in the pub then I can go to sleep easy.
I'd hate to be the wife that texts him whilst he's having a drink just to check when he's coming home. To me that is more controlling.
Having Life360 means that I don't have to bother him or make him do something that he can't be arsed to do.
He wasn't a fan at first but he's come round to it.
Also my sister sometimes comes to visit and she is always late.
So now I check the app and if she's still on the motorway then I can get on with my life rather than sit and wait for her.
And then I'm not mad when she walks in because I haven't been sat around waiting.
I like it.

@sammylady37

*My husband never remembers to text me when he is leaving and obviously once he is driving, he can't text me, so I have no idea how close or far he is. Even if he did text me when leaving, the traffic is very variable.

I do need to know what time he will be home as we eat dinner together and then I go out to work or to run a youth club in the evening so I need to let them know if I will be late if he is running late. (Can't leave any earlier as the kids can't be left alone)*

Your husband holds down a job so presumably he’s a reasonably competent person. So he could make the effort to remember to text you to say he’s leaving. Or put a reminder into his phone to do so.
Dinner doesn’t have to be just ready the minute he arrives home. It could be ready and kept warm for some time, which would cover the ‘variable traffic’ scenario.

Ultimately it makes no difference to me whether or not you track your husband, but I’m just pointing out that your reasons for doing so could be managed by alternative means.

But she doesn't, she uses the app. And she is happy with that, and he is happy with that. So I have no clue why anyone else needs to tell her it's unacceptable. The number of people on here getting irate because other people do something is just mad. No one has said you have to use it if you don't want to.

My DH set up on my phone a tracker for him! He's fascinated by the technology. I only used to use it when checking where he was on the train home (when delayed) so I could start dinner!

@DockOTheBay

Ultimately it makes no difference to me whether or not you track your husband, but I’m just pointing out that your reasons for doing so could be managed by alternative means. Yeah it could be, but the tracking is straightforward and works for both of us so why would I go for less effective methods?

I’m not saying you should, I’m just providing a viewpoint in response to your post, which itself was a reply to my original one.

But she doesn't, she uses the app. And she is happy with that, and he is happy with that. So I have no clue why anyone else needs to tell her it's unacceptable. The number of people on here getting irate because other people do something is just mad. No one has said you have to use it if you don't want to

Get this: we’re posting on a discussion forum. Having a discussion. Which involves different viewpoints and opinions. It’s kinda the point of a discussion forum. I’m very well aware no one has said I have to use it and I’m most certainly not irate because others are doing something.

I have it set up for the kids (teens) as it's very useful in all sorts of ways- including locating mislaid phones, picking up after matches etc etc. I think I share my location with DH- not sure. He doesn't share his with me because he finds it a strange idea and that is fine.

Tracking is only ever acceptable when it's discussed and agreed imo. We don't track each other, we have FindmyIphone, but it's generally used from our own ipads when phones are lost. Would likely be easy to guess passwords but we don't.

DD2 has narcolepsy and she has a tracking app on her phone that we all have the password for. She turns it on and off as and when she wishes and its only ever been used when she's been late and not answering (she fell asleep and missed her stop). It gives her a bit more independence.
She has allowed her last two boyfriends to access it when needed and ended a relationship right away when one got mardy that she'd turned it off (because she wasn't out alone so didn't need tracking - that's all it's for, not just to keep an eye on her).

I don't understand the dinner thing, but that's because I'm quite harsh (according to some). If you don't tell me that you're running late/missed the train/got chatting then your dinner will be on a plate in the oven and the rest of us will have eaten at the pre-arranged time. It doesn't take two seconds to send a text or make a quick hands-free call. And if someone else can't be bothered to remember to let me know then I'm not babying them by doing it for them.

I’ve been alive since all round ‘ere were fields and mobiles were the figment of a sci-fi imagination.

Both parents used to finish at different times. They’d discuss in the morning. 9 times out of 10x we ate as a family WITHOUT TRACKING . No texts about leaving, no knowledge about THE MOMENT to put the pasta on! But yet, we ate! *skillz

As a teen, I did shit my parents would have been about but - guess what?! - without them tracking me, I survived, got pretty streetwise (which encouraged even more streetwise-ness) and my folks didn’t have heart failure *moreskilz

Those who are all about ‘The Safety’ or ‘The Dinner’ need to own their fear, insecurity and control.