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Original poster

My partner is handsy

116 replies

mumsy23baby · 16/01/2022 04:17

I'm 32 and have been with my partner for nearly 6 years. He's not committing to marriage which is a problem for me.
Tonight we went to my friends birthday and he was very handsy (touchy feely) with all of my friends. He even told my friend that her leather trousers looked very sexy and she did too. He is so over familiar with people and gets their numbers all the time and text people in a friendly way and not to be flirty but it really annoys me. There seem to be no boundaries. Every time I say it annoys me he tell me I'm insecure and jealous. I'm nearing ending this relationship. Thoughts?

OP posts:
Ohmamma30 · 16/01/2022 10:35

End it or you'll be made to feel this way for the rest of your life.

RedHot22 · 16/01/2022 10:36

End it
Sorry OP Flowers

Fluffycloudland77 · 16/01/2022 10:45

He’s a Pervy loser who harassed your friends in front of you. Send him packing.

Your friends must pity you being with him.

Mistysnow · 16/01/2022 10:46

I wouldnt feel comfortable with my partner complimenting other women telling them they look sexy in front of me. Its disrespectful and i would be jealous, who cares if you are. your partner of 6 years is meant to be the love of your life only have eyes for you, bare minimum be respectful. You need to set higher standards for yourself qnd that your not willing to accept this. If he isnt willing to stop it or see what hes doing then hes not the right one for you as this is a big issue for you as it would be for any woman to be honest its out of order.

inheritancetrack · 16/01/2022 11:04

End it. Awful man.

GiantHaystacks2021 · 16/01/2022 11:09

Yes, I agree that you're certainly a source of talk and pity, behind your back.

UserError012345 · 16/01/2022 11:15

🤮🤮🤮

litterbird · 16/01/2022 11:19

.....and you want to marry him??? Please tell us why?

Toasterandjam · 16/01/2022 11:21

Slimey arsenal.

ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 16/01/2022 11:36

@mumsy23baby He's not committing to marriage which is a problem for me. because I don't want to marry a childish Jack the Lad who I know I won't ever be able to trust, because I am better than that.

KO81 · 16/01/2022 12:10

@FitAt50

NEVER - ask for relationship advice on here - people automatically tell you to leave no matter what the issue is.
My god. What would your advice be in this situation?!
DinaofCloud9 · 16/01/2022 12:14

Ugh. I imagine your friends have a lot to say about him behind your back. What a creep.

billy1966 · 16/01/2022 12:48

@Bellyups

You know he is the butt of everyone’s jokes, right? Every one knows at least one of these men, and we all laugh (even though it’s not funny at all) at how pathetic they are. Please don’t be the muggy partner of one.
Absolutely this.

All of your friends are wondering why you have spent six years with a creepy loser.

They are embarrassed FOR YOU, that you would remain with someone like this.

He is a sad creep.
Stop being the sad partner of the loser creep.

You deserve better.Flowers

Hoppinggreen · 16/01/2022 12:51

If by “handsy” you mean he’s an inappropriate creep then yes he is.
Get rid of him and stop listening to his gaslighting and minimising

youvegottenminuteslynn · 16/01/2022 13:19

@FitAt50

NEVER - ask for relationship advice on here - people automatically tell you to leave no matter what the issue is.
You'd want your daughter to marry this bloke would you?

I hate the term 'handsy' because what it actually means is 'doesn't respect boundaries so touches women when it isn't wanted and isn't appropriate' aka an entitled prick.

If your bar is that low in a relationship then I feel sorry for you.

Paddingtonthebear · 16/01/2022 13:22

Haven’t read the full thread so you may have answered this, but what do your friends / family think? Have they said anything? I would imagine this is really awkward for them and I bet they wish he would stop. They probably want to avoid him. Regardless of what he says, this is all him and not you. I bet he has an end game to all this. Time to walk away.

SandyPanda · 16/01/2022 14:10

Sorry what now? He gets other women's numbers?

And you're okay with that?

Fluffymule · 16/01/2022 14:21

@Bellyups

You know he is the butt of everyone’s jokes, right? Every one knows at least one of these men, and we all laugh (even though it’s not funny at all) at how pathetic they are. Please don’t be the muggy partner of one.
Oh yes, this.

Wherever these men are found there is a social group that silently despises him but is holding off saying something or making a fuss because they like, and pity, his partner.

I'm sure if you do dump the creep there will be a fair bit of rejoicing and relieved high fives discreetly shared out of your sight.

TheBeardedVulture · 16/01/2022 14:24

My thought is that he sucks and you should definitely bin him.

Go to Reddit and find the Female Dating Strategy subreddit. You need it OP!

PinkSyCo · 16/01/2022 14:28

He sounds a right creep. Get rid.

Mermaidwaves · 16/01/2022 15:59

OP he's that creep that everyone knows and tries to avoid who always tries to touch you up and makes you feel a bit sick in your mouth 🤢 we all know one!

Don't be his partner! Again everyone knows and pities you, they just won't be saying it to your face, you deserve so much better!

5128gap · 16/01/2022 16:17

You shouldn't be putting up with him, but even if you choose to, I'd advise you to stop taking him around your friends. He's probably at best embarrassing them, and at worst harassing them. You may find invitations start to dry up.

Feetupteashot · 16/01/2022 16:20

Ltb

Pinkbonbon · 16/01/2022 16:29

On the subject of what her friends think, it's worth noting that since he is clearly a manipulative gaslighting sort, he might also be one of those people that is magnetic in social situations and just seems to get away with things he shouldn't. The 'he's a jerk but he's OUR jerk' sorta group feeling. It's possible that some people don't see him as creepy unfortunately. Which can make it harder for women to leave these sorts. Because it's like they are veing gaslighted by other peoples opinions that he is a great lad altogether.

Of course, some people will see through it. Some of which will be the women he has innapropriately texted (or something else). You'll notice they either stop meeting you both, or are avoiding you at gatherings.

All else asside, he has a spell on you and you need to break it. You've seen how he treats people be js supposed to care about. When you are (rightly) insecure, he attacks you, makes out you are in the wrong fir your perfectly valid feelings. That's what horrible people do..not suitable partners. You deserve better. Hell, everyone does.

Frigginintheriggin · 16/01/2022 16:40

On a relatives wedding day, in front of her and the family, her sleazy husband was groping and snogging another woman while she silently sobbed.
Don't let that be you....
(As far as I know they're still married, I have fuck all to do with them anymore)