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Original poster

Love hearts and pink

87 replies

quaychange · 02/01/2022 14:41

Stupid question but if you went to drop off the dog at your ex's and there was a pink electric toothbrush in the bathroom and a new doormat with hearts on, what would you think?!

He said the electric toothbrush is his. I didn't comment on the doormat. I always used to buy plain doormats as he was very fussy about patterns. He wasn't happy with anything too 'feminine' in the house in terms of decor.

He becomes tearful every time he sees me, says he wants me to return. The tears are not an act. I feel sorry for him but I am happier away from him. He has form for lying and he does it very well. I can't be with a man I cannot trust.

OP posts:
Calamitydrayne · 02/01/2022 14:42

I'd think it's my Ex so it's none of my business.

AnneLovesGilbert · 02/01/2022 14:45

I’d think someone else was living there or he’d always had a hankering for pink accessories and hid it through shame.

CrushedPistachios · 02/01/2022 14:46

Are you trying to share custody of a dog with an ex?

sammylady37 · 02/01/2022 14:47

@Calamitydrayne

I'd think it's my Ex so it's none of my business.
This. And I certainly wouldn’t ask him about it.
Original poster
quaychange · 02/01/2022 14:47

@CrushedPistachios

Are you trying to share custody of a dog with an ex?
Yes
OP posts:
Original poster
quaychange · 02/01/2022 14:49

He could just tell me if there is someone new and then I wouldn't worry about him. ATM he seems so distressed, I worry (as I would about pretty much anyone who is that sad).

OP posts:
insancerre · 02/01/2022 14:49

I think he’s moved on
And good on him

CrushedPistachios · 02/01/2022 14:50

It really doesn’t work in my experience when I’ve seen separated couples try to share a dog.

One of you will need to walk away.

HNY2022mam · 02/01/2022 14:52

Why were you in his bathroom? You need to let him go.

AnneLovesGilbert · 02/01/2022 14:52

If he told you he couldn’t keep trying to make you feel bad by bawling when he sees you.

Original poster
quaychange · 02/01/2022 14:55

@HNY2022mam

Why were you in his bathroom? You need to let him go.
Eh?! It is half my house and I needed to pee!
OP posts:
Original poster
quaychange · 02/01/2022 14:56

@AnneLovesGilbert

If he told you he couldn’t keep trying to make you feel bad by bawling when he sees you.
I don't think that's it. Why would he want me to feel bad?
OP posts:
HNY2022mam · 02/01/2022 15:26

@quaychange but you aren’t living there, that’s his space now you need to respect his boundaries.

Original poster
quaychange · 02/01/2022 15:28

[quote HNY2022mam]@quaychange but you aren’t living there, that’s his space now you need to respect his boundaries.[/quote]
What am I supposed to do if I need to pee then?!

OP posts:
HNY2022mam · 02/01/2022 15:32

@quaychange pee where you live unless you have a medical condition that effects that ability.

My ex used to pull shit like this - he also used to have a lie down in my bed, because he paid for half of it apparently.

ZoeTheThornyDevil · 02/01/2022 15:34

I'd think that I had absolutely no business in my ex's bathroom much less monitoring his hygienic accessories, and would resolve not to do it in future.

Moff2k · 02/01/2022 15:34

Yeah you are giving seriously mixed messages. You have told him you're happier without him, but you're in the house, using the bathroom, looking at his stuff, wondering about doormats and maintaining contact by sharing custody of a dog.
You need to let him move on and mind your business

Buildingthefuture · 02/01/2022 15:36

A pink toothbrush and a love heart door mat??? There is definitely a woman in that somewhere!! I’m sure it’s confusing for you, since he’s asking you to return, but honestly, some men just pull that shit. He’s your ex for a reason…..talk about the dog but nothing else

GarageMusicLover1980 · 02/01/2022 15:37

I'd think he's moved on. And he's within his rights if he's an ex. Maybe you should do the same Confused

HailAdrian · 02/01/2022 15:39

I'd think 'that's a tacky doormat.'

HacerSonarSusPasos · 02/01/2022 15:40

That one time that I went to a ti service date's house (who presumably lived alone) and noticed a huge pink shower puff in the bathroom it turn out he was hiding a girlfriend from me.

I'd say there's another woman in the picture.

GarageMusicLover1980 · 02/01/2022 15:40

And as an adult surely you can hold your pee until you get home. You only use HIS bathroom to check his things.

scousemousex · 02/01/2022 15:41

Sounds like you don't want him and don't want anytime else to have him.

If he gets so upset when he sees you and yet you're round there all the time how is he supposed to move on? Particularly if you're rooting around in the bathroom and asking questions.

Honestly OP, YABU here.

HacerSonarSusPasos · 02/01/2022 15:41

To a tinder date's house*

Damn autocorrect

Sn0tnose · 02/01/2022 15:42

I think you’re being really unrealistic about sharing the dog. It never works and it isn’t working here. One of you needs to walk away.

I think he’s met someone and it’s serious enough that she feels comfortable buying doormats for the house, but that he’d quite happily take up with you again if he thought you’d agree.

I also think that you need to stay out of his home. Go to the loo before you leave home. You’re not six. There needs to be firm boundaries between you.