Love hearts and pink

[quaychange]

Stupid question but if you went to drop off the dog at your ex's and there was a pink electric toothbrush in the bathroom and a new doormat with hearts on, what would you think?!

He said the electric toothbrush is his. I didn't comment on the doormat. I always used to buy plain doormats as he was very fussy about patterns. He wasn't happy with anything too 'feminine' in the house in terms of decor.

He becomes tearful every time he sees me, says he wants me to return. The tears are not an act. I feel sorry for him but I am happier away from him. He has form for lying and he does it very well. I can't be with a man I cannot trust.

You broke up with him because he lies and paid for sex whilst you were together. If he was doing that then he clearly has no genuine love or feelings or respect for you.

He didn’t like being found out/getting dumped because he was not in control of that process so encourages his latest conquest to leave her stuff at his house (or he just planted it there) in the hope you see it and get jealous – he’s monitoring your reaction. You react and question him. He lies. And turns on the Crocodile Tears to tug at your heart strings. He’s playing mind-games.

He’s a manipulative liar. These types of men only care about their own feelings. If you give in he’ll be doing silent high-fives because he now knows you can be emotionally manipulated. That is not about you. It’s about him. You can’t reason with that type of man but what you can do is respect your own boundaries and sense of self-worth by ignoring the pink and girly stuff and keeping arrangements strictly to the dog and sorting out what’s going to happen with the house which is half yours but he’s living in.

You know all this deep down really don’t you? That’s why you ended it. “Something” inside you told you he was a wrong-un. This was confirmed by his lies and sex addiction. So you ended it. You respected your own boundaries. Remember that and don’t get suckered in to the push-me-pull-you game of the Head-Fuck.

Be strong. Stand your ground. You are not there to counsel him. He’s a grown up and responsible for his own behaviour and actions. You don’t need to “understand” him to know he’s not the right guy for you.

You clearly still love him.

But he's not a good un, you know this man would hurt you forever more if you got back together.

The dog situation is you holding on, you must go NC to get him out of your system.
It's hard but you know the truth really.

The toothbrush and mat could be someone else, anythings possible with a shite like that.

Take care, good luck with the withdrawl.

your behaviour isn’t normal because you’re fixating on whether or not your EX is seeing someone new, you ‘needed’ to use HIS bathroom but oh, it’s half your bathroom apparently. move on

Needed to pee my backside.

I’d assume he had a new partner. A rather stupid one.

What am I supposed to do if I need to pee then?!

Do what you would do if you were not in his house .....find a public toilet nearby.

Well, lets hope the dog likes his nice new things.. The man is trying to cheer himself up, so dont be feeling sorry for him, but make sure you wipe your muddy boots on the doormat..

Oh bless the poor drama king.
Yes he's miffed because you're not on the floor begging to come back.
He's planted the pink items to fuck with your head or his newbie needs her her head seen to.
Don't go there. Make other arrangements for his dog share drop off.

He is an adult: please leave him be with the fallout resulting from his actions. He might have a new woman with execrable taste in household accoutrements or they might be items he's bought to pique your interest: either way it's absolutely none of your business now. Unless you want to rekindle your relationship, you need to be a lot more detached from him than you are.

@betwixtlives

your behaviour isn’t normal because you’re fixating on whether or not your EX is seeing someone new, you ‘needed’ to use HIS bathroom but oh, it’s half your bathroom apparently. move on

I needed to use the bathroom and the bathroom is 50% mine, legally. What sort of person are you when someone says they need to use the toilet and you question the veracity of that statement?!?

@HomeTheatreSystem

He is an adult: please leave him be with the fallout resulting from his actions. He might have a new woman with execrable taste in household accoutrements or they might be items he's bought to pique your interest: either way it's absolutely none of your business now. Unless you want to rekindle your relationship, you need to be a lot more detached from him than you are.

Good advice. I do not want to rekindle the relationship, I was detached, then he's started playing on my weak spot (I don't like seeing people upset).

@quaychange or @Quaychange, whatever one you’re using right now: the sort of person that knows you’d have snooped in the ‘legally 50% yours’ () bathroom whether you needed to pee or not

Why the vitriol @betwixtlives ?! There's nothing to indicate the 'legally 50% yours' is not correct and if OP says she didn't snoop then why don't you believe her?!

Maybe he is more comfortable with his feminine side and just got a pink toothbrush because it was the last in stock or going cheap.