Gaslighting - please help me

[gravybones]

DP has just stormed out for the 100th time this Christmas

We are both drunk. Both trying to just get on with things.

I turn around, he's storming out. him: "You're a nasty bitch."

Me: "what have I done??"

Him "what have I done?"

Me: "nothing! You're the one storming out! What have I done? Why am I a nasty bitch?"

Him: "I didn't do anything what did I do?"

I can't wrap my head around it. He always turns his accusations against me into pretending I've accuse him when I've done nothing of the sort! What the hell do I do?

Leave him... He sounds manipulative and awful. Nobody deserves to be treated that way. Let him leave... "Don't let the door hit you .. "

What bizarre behaviour from him, so he’s actually denying what he just said seconds before?

Let him storm out permanently, who needs this kind of shit?

Change the locks!

Why do you keep getting back with him?

There's a huge bit missing here. I am guessing f he called you a nasty bitch because of something that happened before. And his 'what have I done?' Was in reference to the argument in general.

However, you both sound miserable and like you like the toxic drama. You need to keep him gone.

He came back and demanded I apologise. I asked him what I had to apologise for?

He asked me what he had to apologise for? I said nothing... because I hadn't accused him of anything!!! I wasn't asking him to apologise!

He said I had been a nasty bitch but wouldn't tell me what I'd actually done. But I needed to apologise for "it" anyway.

He has now left in a screaming rage

You're well rid.
Lock and bolt the door.
New year, New life.

Lock the door and don’t let him back in. Then ditch the booze.

Can you just kick him out? Or is there somewhere you could go now and just let him to it?

Why put up with this kind of shit, he sounds unhinged.

Sorry missed he’s left in a rage, good riddance, can he stay gone?

I think you both need to stop drinking.

Get rid. You don't deserve this treatment.

I can't cope. I don't know what i did to deserve his latest round of name calling

You didn't did not do anything. You don't deserve it.

Why do you keep looking inwards?
It's not your fault he is an asshole.

Normal people don't gaslight people. It's the domain of fundamentally disordered bullies.

Stop trying to work it out. Just get away from him.
A lamb can never understand a lion.

*did not do anything
Lol

You were both drunk when this conversation happened.
You were probably both being twats.

He does sound like a violent dickhead though and I'd get rid of him anyway.

And where does he go when he storms out?

A partner in a screaming rage would terrify me and I'd have to leave him. I couldn't live like that.

He Sound's unhinged surely there must be more to this weird behaviour

Go to bed. Talk when you’re both sober xx

You're being abused. What's your housing situation? And finances - are they joint?

I'm not sure where he's gone. I've locked the door

I don't know what to say when he demands I apologise but can't and won't tell me what I need to apologise for

Apparently I should just "know" and if I don't know - I'm wrong for not knowing

Just don’t let him back. Finish it and try to move on

Is it a shared house? Do you share finances? And has he ever been physically abusive?

That info (only if you are comfortable sharing) can help people offer the most relevant advice as to next steps