Age gaps.......I know the answer but

[Blushingm]

Please tell me 18 years is too much of an age gap!

I wish it wasn't but I think it is. I really like him but I really think he's too young

As long as he's a consenting adult then I don't really see an issue.

People will have different opinions on it but if you're both happy, who cares?

It depends a bit on what your ages actually are. If you're 38 and he is 20, that would be a problem because a 20 year old is still a bit of a lad, and you're a mature woman. But if the ages are 48 and 30 I'd give it a go, because you'd be more on the same page .

What ages?

48 and 30 is ok

But 38 and 20 not so great

And also 55 and 73 not so great

Basically there’s a very brief window where this sort of gap will feel small

@minipie

48 and 30 is ok

But 38 and 20 not so great

And also 55 and 73 not so great

Basically there’s a very brief window where this sort of gap will feel small

Yes very wise!

25 & 43

I thought he was older at first, I was when he said 25

Fine for a fling.

I wouldn't want it to go any further though.

And is it serious for either of you, or a fun exciting and new experience for you both that eventually will be done? Sounds fun if neither expects more. Do you have children?

It's really early days so I couldn't say either way. We just seem to get on and have loads in common

I have kids - he doesn't, he split with his wife about 6 months ago

I ask because it would be unfair on him if you were in a rush to have children. He won’t be thinking about that yet so he can crack on. I would enjoy it. But I understand it could get serious and thus confusing for both. I would love the fling but i think over time I would feel to old for him (rather than him being too young for me).

Too old for him*

Scott Mitchell and Barbara Windsor were 28 and 55 when they met… he stayed with her to the end. So it can work.

Toby Tarrant is marrying Pippa Taylor, they’ve a 14 year age gap & are very happy.

If you’re looking for a fun interlude, if he’s going to want kids but you don’t want another baby, then it’s not necessarily going to last. But does it need to?

As a child of parents with a 20 year age gap, it’s not great for the younger parent when the older one gets ill or just too old to cope and they have to be nurse, cook & bottle washer.

25 and divorced is a lot of baggage.

What age is your eldest child?

@LHReturns

I ask because it would be unfair on him if you were in a rush to have children. He won’t be thinking about that yet so he can crack on. I would enjoy it. But I understand it could get serious and thus confusing for both. I would love the fling but i think over time I would feel to old for him (rather than him being too young for me).

That's what worries me - me feeling too old rather than him being too young

My eldest is 19

@Blushingm

My eldest is 19

Fast forward 6 years. How would you feel if they were with a 43 year old?

Barbara Windsor really couldn't have had a better husband than Scott Mitchell and thee was 16 years between them. I remember watching a programme with her and him begore her dementia and they were really happy together. And there's over 30 years between Joan Collins and her husband and they're very happy too.

However, in both those cases there was never any question of children and I think that's what would make the difference.

@SmallBoyFury ah sorry, i didn't mean to tag you. So sorry! apologies! I also don't know why it tagged you. Didn't see even your view on the matter

My grandma married her second husband when he was 26 and she was 44. They were very happy for almost 30 years (she's passed on). He was my (step)grandpa for my whole life. Part of the family.

I wouldn't, especially as you have a 19 year old daughter.

At 43 it's a tough call . I can see why you are questioning yourself.

If you broke up how heartbroken would you be ? If you think you'd bounce back to dating again in about a month or two then I'd part and move on.
if you think you could never look at another man, then stick with him. Either way - hood luck to you both 🌼

I always go by the half your age plus seven rule - because it almost always seems to be correct as it accounts for the fact age differences get less of an issue as you get older.

You don’t pass that (by that logic the youngest you should be going 28.5), but I mean, it’s just a saying, there are always going to be exceptions to the rule. I would be concerned myself about the different life stages you are at.