Partner can’t stand my mother

[Lollypopla]

He said i cant stand her I don’t want to be around her any more.
Shes not done anything, he said she said hello to him in a sarcastic way at a recent family occasion. Implying that its suprising to see him, which to be fair he never visits or socialise with my family anyway.
I said she wouldn’t be like that its not her but he said im too dosy im in a bubble and don’t notice anything.
He said she loves drama but i can tell you now she is the opposite of that.
She does say the wrong thing sometimes but its more a nervous thing to fill a silence.

What a dick. Sorry but it’s all so childish. Don’t you want better? This is your life. Never taking someone to a family celebration. How utterly miserable

This sounds like my DH tbh. If my family ask where he is I say he’s antisocial and would rather be at home. He comes to the events he can’t miss (big birthdays, births, funerals etc.). He doesn’t come to things where partners are invited etc. It gets lonely as everyone always brings their partners but we now have a DD and I use it as a complete break from them both. No real words of advice just that I do get it.

He doesn't like your mom cos he's sensed that she's got him sussed

I don’t think it sounds like he’s alienating you - just that he’s socially awkward and doesn’t like being around your family. It’s a vicious circle though - the less he visits, the more they comment and make digs about it, the less he wants to visit.

I would leave him to it, and explain to your family that he finds family events difficult and so won’t be visiting.

I don’t like that he called you ‘dozy’.

Thats what i mostly do @MyAnacondaMight it’s annoying & boring tho

Do you have any children?
It sounds like he is alienating you from your family and being unpleasant.

he is trying to isolate you from your family.

this is a massive red flag for abusive behaviour - like a predator separating one from the herd before the attack.

you need to call it quits asap, run fast, run far.

@wavingwhilstdrowning yes we have kids
Not married though