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Original poster

Am I a freak of nature?

48 replies

amiafreakofnature · 30/10/2021 21:54

Just wondering because I've been through the menopause and still have a good sexual appetite and love to sexually please my husband- I mean obviously I have sex because I enjoy it to but all you seem to hear about is how menopause makes women cut all intimacy off

OP posts:
sadie9 · 30/10/2021 21:59

What age are you? When did you go through menopause? How are you coping with vaginal atrophy?

Original poster
amiafreakofnature · 30/10/2021 22:07

I'm 41 and had a full hysterectomy
Don't get any dryness

OP posts:
NumberZ · 30/10/2021 22:10

I hope not.

PromisesMeanNothingSue · 30/10/2021 22:10

Well of course you”re not a freak, but you have had a totally different experience of menopause to those to experience it naturally. Surgical menopause (with or without HRT) is not the same as natural menopuse.

Pallisers · 30/10/2021 22:21

I had a natural menopause and really had no problems. my libido is better than ever and I have had no vaginal dryness. I feel lucky - have had my fair share of gyney issues over my life so I completely understand my experience is just that. My weight went up though for the first time in my life and I find it really hard to lose weight.

DivorcedAndDelighted · 30/10/2021 22:24

There are plenty of women who also comment on here and on the Sex board that their sex drive increased during and after menopause, and others who are well through it and still having a great time. You're not a freak. But for those who aren't so lucky, treatment can help. Some women get vaginal dryness, & some find vaginal estrogen gel very helpful. There's an element of "use it or lose it" because having regular sex helps to prevent vaginal atrophy post menopause. - if you're interested reading around the subject there are some good resources here: www.balance-menopause.com/menopause-library/

MMmomDD · 30/10/2021 22:25

Some women don’t lose libido in menopause. You may be in that category.
Also not all women experience dryness and pain.
Usually with hysterectomy in your age you’d be on some sort of hormone replacement. This can also be an explanation.

But it doesn’t really matter why, does it?
Just enjoy.

AnaViaSalamanca · 30/10/2021 22:45

Freak of nature? Yes, but only because you sound like a troll.

You can google for this info a lot easier than collecting anecdotes from women.

Theuniverseandeverything · 30/10/2021 22:48

How can you be a freak with a sex drive at 41?

Angrymum22 · 31/10/2021 08:41

Use it or lose it has always been my mantra.

Pinkbucket · 31/10/2021 08:48

Of course you’re not a freak . Having been through the memo myself I can say it wasn’t so much my libido that went as the desire to have sex with a man who seem to be turned off by me actually being of menopausal age
I was keen but a light seemed to switch in him where all he wanted was porn and the fantasy of younger women
But yeah , with the right man I would feel like you .
Enjoy

makelovenotpetrol · 31/10/2021 09:01

@AnaViaSalamanca

Freak of nature? Yes, but only because you sound like a troll.

You can google for this info a lot easier than collecting anecdotes from women.

Grin so true
PermanentTemporary · 31/10/2021 09:06

A relative lost her sex drive at menopause and then found it again big time after divorcing her husband and meeting someone else. I doubt she's particularly unusual in there being a huge emotional and social side to her sex drive. It's not a lamp that switches on or off.

AlphabetAerobics · 31/10/2021 09:15

Nah, you’re not a freak - your husband might be though if you still like him enough to want to have Alex with him! Grin

IMO it’s perhaps less about “hormones” and more about the fact that by the time we reach menopausal age we see men are full of shit and would rather read a book.

KirstenBlest · 31/10/2021 13:13

I think I must be a freak because I hear so much about the menopause.

Nothing changed other than I stopped having periods.

But from the media I should have a fog for a brain, be sweating bucketfuls ...

FlibbertyGibbitt · 31/10/2021 13:17

Give it time ! 🤣

thedevilinablackdress · 31/10/2021 13:21

Did you go straight onto HRT following surgery? That's quite possibly the difference.

Arrowheart · 31/10/2021 13:24

What a weird OP. Almost like 'hey look at me! I love sex! Most other women are all miserable menopausal dried up men haters but not me! I must be a freak!'

Please tell me how boring and sexless you all are....

Inthesameboatatmo · 31/10/2021 13:33

Good for you op , but you've gone through a surgical menopause which is completely different.
I'm peri and already my sex drive is waning but I have a very supportive partner and I do love sex with him when I have it I just don't get the urge as much at the moment.

emptyempire · 31/10/2021 13:47

@Arrowheart

What a weird OP. Almost like 'hey look at me! I love sex! Most other women are all miserable menopausal dried up men haters but not me! I must be a freak!'

Please tell me how boring and sexless you all are....

This was the vibe I got from the OP too.

Good for you though OP.

My libido has definitely taken a hit, but mainly due to tiredness. I do still have a sex drive, but I'm quite a bit older than you.

SecretDoor · 31/10/2021 15:04

Have you definitely still got your ovaries ? If not are you on HRT?

Original poster
amiafreakofnature · 31/10/2021 15:10

@Inthesameboatatmo

Good for you op , but you've gone through a surgical menopause which is completely different. I'm peri and already my sex drive is waning but I have a very supportive partner and I do love sex with him when I have it I just don't get the urge as much at the moment.
I was peri long before having the surgery. It never waned. I don't have my ovaries at all and I'm on oestrogel hrt
OP posts:
knittingaddict · 31/10/2021 15:10

@Arrowheart

What a weird OP. Almost like 'hey look at me! I love sex! Most other women are all miserable menopausal dried up men haters but not me! I must be a freak!'

Please tell me how boring and sexless you all are....

Oh yes, definitely getting that vibe too.
Original poster
amiafreakofnature · 31/10/2021 15:14

Hardly that ffs I just wanted to know if anyone else was the same I feel something of an oddity! God menopause has also made some of you sour as anything

OP posts:
Flipflopfoodle · 31/10/2021 17:20

Luckily menopause has made you sweet as a peach OP, seems like you have some strong preconceived ideas of menopausal women, but you are special and different so enjoy