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Original poster

Ex asking Son to live in Caravan!!!

130 replies

Oakleaf40 · 26/10/2021 16:23

Will try to cut a long story short my Ex and I and my Son decided it was best for him move to live with his father and his new GF to go to a college that was best suited for my son. (Due to having a really bad time at his previous school he didn't want to go any of the colleges where all these kids went that made his life hell were going to attend)

The Ex did not tell his new partner that my son was going to be moving in with him , Quite understandably she was not happy to not find this out without discussion and we had a few heated exchanges between us. She had said it was something she was trying to figure out if it would work etc..anyway the Ex must have smoothed things over with her and he moved in.

Now after a not even 2 mths she's started to pick at everything he does...Claiming to now have OCD!! ( Never in the whole time hes been with her has this ever come up) Oh and now shes claustrophobic..... he's got to keep everything as she wants it.. Cant use a cup, glass without it having to be washed up and cleared away right that moment.
She ripped up his cable for his playstation 4 times!! and left it on a pile in his room and broke it.
This weekend when I went to collect him they have asked him how he would feel about him living in a Caravan!!

Im at my witts end and I do not know how to sort this situation out.. She knew what she was getting into but I also cannot believe my Ex would even suggest this!! or allow this to even happen to his son...

Am I wrong to be totally disgusted at the suggestion???
Need help and advice before i explode. !!

OP posts:

Christmas1988 · 26/10/2021 17:28

I don’t think a caravan that cost £1000 is going to be much cop at all! They can’t make him live in a tatty old caravan. I’m sure he likes the idea but realistically it’s going to be hell. I don’t know what to suggest, maybe let him try and then when he hates it, his father will have to have him back?

MagicWorkout · 26/10/2021 17:30

I imagined it would be a nice caravan that they already own. No, a £1000 caravan won't do.

NotaCoolMum · 26/10/2021 17:33

Oh my God She’s a VILE COW!!!! 🤬🤬🤬🤬 your Ex is no better though! How could he even entertain this idea?! Your poor DS 💖 I feel for you. My Ex is married to an evil cunt who treats my DS the same. I don’t allow DS to stay there anymore because of it.

Pinkbonbon · 26/10/2021 17:34

I wouldn't want some teenager living with me either tbf. But why are you mad at her? It's not her son? How she feels is something your ex should be handling. You shouldn't get involved.

I think the caravan is actually a great idea anyway! It means they'll both have some personal space. Good idea from dad!

Pinkbonbon · 26/10/2021 17:39

As for trying to stop you and the ex communicating unless it's essential...umm, your kid is 16 right? So why would you need to talk to your ex much anyway? You can talk directly to the kid. For the most part. Unless you've other kids too but then that would fall under 'essential comminication'.

Sorry op but it sounds like your the nuisance ex who won't give her any peace. And that maybe your ex enjoys playing you both off against eachother. Tells you both the other one is causing problems, stirs the pot, then sits back.

mumwon · 26/10/2021 17:43

So no heating & going into winter & it won't have a loo/bathroom & unless they have it on the drive way who pays for ground rent? Most campsites are only open during summer & they can be choosey about which caravan they allow on site.
If she's is thinking of the driveway there may be local bylaws against this as well
she is a choice piece of work & no wonder your ex is your ex
in short she is a fully fledged bitch

mumwon · 26/10/2021 17:43

& it probably won't have electric either

Newwifeatnumber10 · 26/10/2021 17:48

It’s actually none of your business!

Motnight · 26/10/2021 17:52

@Newwifeatnumber10

It’s actually none of your business!

That's right @Newwifeatnumber10 why should the Op care where her 16 year old son has to live?

pinkyredrose · 26/10/2021 17:55

She knew what she was getting into

What do you mean by this?

NowEvenBetter · 26/10/2021 17:57

Poor kid must feel so discarded. Sees his mother 4 days a month, father wants him out in order to facilitate getting a regular shag from his shitty girlfriend, been bullied.
Is there anywhere he feels loved and wanted and valued?

RandomMess · 26/10/2021 17:58

Seems like he needs to move home and start college again next year.

Your ex is a selfish useless father it seems

Gatekeeper · 26/10/2021 18:00

@Newwifeatnumber10

It’s actually none of your business!

you silly bugger...of course its her business

Thingsdogetbetter · 26/10/2021 18:01

Who moved in with whom? And how new is this new gf?

If new gf moved in with him, then your ex is a bastard for allowing her to dictate who lives in his home. He's also a bastard for considering making his son live in a caravan to keep his gf happy.

If he moved in with her, then he's a bastard for making decisions about who lives in her home without consulting her. He's also a bastard for not moving into his own property with his son when his gf started kicking off.

DriftingBlue · 26/10/2021 18:02

His father needs to move out and find a new place that is appropriate for himself and his children.

Squellyolwelly · 26/10/2021 18:03

I’m about 15 miles from Peterborough, have you considered CRC (Cambridge) or Wisbech College of West Anglia? Thats assuming the other kids have all gone to PRC..

It’s a bit of travel but means he can stay at home with you.

Etinoxaurus · 26/10/2021 18:03

Eugh, poor kid. @Oakleaf40 your ex is being a wet lettuce about this, not that you need telling but it does make it harder for you to support your son when he’s being so feeble.
Can you contact college directly and ask for a meeting with student support? He might be able to board with a teacher or other student or be housed in semi independent student accommodation. A £1000 caravan is not ok

Pinkbonbon · 26/10/2021 18:05

I presumed they just meant to put the caravan on their driveway. That way he can still go inside if need be.

HalzTangz · 26/10/2021 18:05

I would tell the ex he has to fork out rent and bills for a studio or bedsit flat whilst he's at college, or, adapt so he lives in the house.

Alternatively, could you relocate?

TheFormidableMrsC · 26/10/2021 18:07

@Pinkbonbon

I wouldn't want some teenager living with me either tbf. But why are you mad at her? It's not her son? How she feels is something your ex should be handling. You shouldn't get involved.

I think the caravan is actually a great idea anyway! It means they'll both have some personal space. Good idea from dad!

Are you fucking serious

Avarua · 26/10/2021 18:07

The entitlement on this thread!! Loads of teens live in caravans and sleepouts! It's practically the norm in my part of the world. Caravans are fine. He has his own space. He might quite like it. I think mum should butt out. It's dad's business what he does to house his kid.

EdgeOfTheSky · 26/10/2021 18:12

This is dreadful.

The poor poor boy.

And clearly the caravan in question is not a ‘static’ , well set up for year round living, but a crappy little tourer with no insulation. Is he supposed to do all his cooking and washing, alone in the caravan, with few facilities ?

OP your ex is a knob for not discussing it, and a spineless knob for allowing his son to be treated like this.

I am not sure what best to do.

The course sounds great, and it would be terrible to disrupt that and his new friendships.

Elieza · 26/10/2021 18:14

Your ex and his partner really suit each other, he’s an arsehole for thinking dc could move in without even telling his burd, and she’s not very nice as she’s kicking his kid into a shitty caravan!

Where are they planning to put the caravan? Some councils won’t let you live in a caravan without planning permission.

I’d be going mental at the both of them. WTAF is wrong with them.

Can you speak to the colleague or council or housing association to see what local options there might be for housing near college.

He can’t live in a shitty van in the winter. Fair enough if it was a ‘park home’ but it’s not even a static by the sound of it?! It’s any old shit.

Hell no. He should be putting his child first but he’ll put her first as he’ll likely think with his hairy brain instead of his actual brain.

Poor kid.

EdgeOfTheSky · 26/10/2021 18:14

What is your part of the world @Avarua ? Is it freezing cold and very damp, and are the caravans flimsy non-insulated constructions?

TheFormidableMrsC · 26/10/2021 18:14

OP get him out of there and make other arrangements. I've been in a situation with a jealous girlfriend who made my sons life an absolute misery. She also tried to control communication and encouraged others to be unkind to my child.

The upshot of this is ex has lost contact and she's subject to an injunction. This won't get better.

At 16 he's a child. A caravan is not appropriate, sorry to those who think it is, it isn't. Then she'll start on the next thing, when he's allowed in etc. Your ex needs to grow a pair of balls. Weirdly mine is also from Sheffield, maybe they're related 🙄.

Advocate for your son

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