OH wants to move on

[Tina7391]

My partner says he wants to put our house (that we bought a year ago) on the market because it hasn't "fixed" us. I had no idea anything had been wrong until this declaration. I'm really angry as the house that was sold to pay a huge deposit was my house. I feel as though I've lost loads due to him not being honest. I asked several times before we moved if he was sure as this was a big commitment. We've been together a long time. He's done this before during stressful periods at the start of our relationship but I would have said we've been solid for several years. I'm just so mad and trying to hold it together as don't want to rile him before the house is sold. How do I deal with my anger? Help

@GreenLunchBox

I'm pretty shocked you didn't protect your deposit. Did your solicitor not ask you about this when you were buying the house?

Yeah I'm a bit confused - you have to get independent legal advice normally in these sort of situations?

Sorry if I've missed it but did OP say whether they are tenants in common v joint tenants etc?

I’m so sorry this has happened to you. Always keep in mind that you are able to manage financially alone. Even if you incur a loss due to the house, you have earning power and the ability to start again. I know it feels a huge loss and betrayal, which it is, but you can pick yourself up and start again with your cats. I doubt he can.

Keep yourself and your cats well. Keep your emotions with him underwraps. Be polite, civilised and say very little. Tell him nothing of your plans. They think they have control over their decisions. They do. But they don’t have control over yours.

Look after yourself. You will come through this.

@Tina7391

Lady...

will you seek good legal advice .. ? 🌸

I'll be moving with my 3 cats and don't really care about the material things as long as my cats are okay

@Tina7391 please tell me you are going to see a solicitor and will NOT just let thing go so he stays in the very nice house you bought as you have to start from scratch again.

Especially when he already KNEW the relationhsip wasn’t good but didn’t think it was something worth mentioning at the time (despite you questioning things).

Oh OP, please don't take this lying down.

When you have a bit of distance from it, you will be so furious at yourself.

He could well have met someone else and will be using YOUR money to set himself up with her.

For goodness sake get legal advice.

"The lawyer just used my house equity as the deposit so I'm assuming he would be entitled to half since both names are on the new mortgage."

@Tina7391 Why on earth are you proceeding on the basis of assumptions? English law is pretty sophisticated and takes relevant facts and circumstances into account. The fact that you put the lion's share of the money in is a very relevant factor here and could have a bearing on the outcome. Don't assume anything. Pay for proper legal advice on this.

As @billy1966 says - you absolutely will kick yourself later if you don't get proper advice now. It may be that a lawyer with the relevant expertise will tell you there's nothing to be done but at least then you'll know you checked the position out properly. If you proceed just on the basis of assumptions, comments by strangers on the internet and doing a bit of googling on the subject, you are screwing yourself over, just after he's screwed you over. Don't do that to yourself.

I'm a lawyer. This is completely not my area of expertise so I can't advise. But that's how I can tell you that you may well find that the law can be more helpful to you here than you seem to realise. And speaking as a lawyer, I would do nothing in relation to the house before I had obtained some legal advice.

What is on the mortgage is not the issue. It is what provision has been made for the deeds. If you are joint tenants then you both share the whole value equally (split 50/50 if sold and you go your separate ways).If tenants in common you each own a specified share. Usually 50/50 unless one partner has a large contribution to protect. It doesn't sound like a TIC arrangement was put in place to provide for unequal shares.

He may do the right thing. If communication is good you could broach with him entering into a TIC deed asap so this is all in place before the sale. If he refuses or obfuscates you know you will have a fight coming up.

Prima facie he is entitled to 50%. That isn't necessarily the end of the road as there is a difference between legal ownership (how the deeds are held) and beneficial ownership. Beneficial ownership is where one party holds a legal share on behalf of another person - "on trust". It is possible for the person owed the beneficial sum/share to succeed in claiming it. You will need evidence of what each of you put in and if possible any evidence of agreement between you (letter, email, text etc) that your extra contribution is considered an extra share.

Best to get legal advice. If your evidence is clear and compelling he may back down quite quickly rather than have you start court proceedings.

This is why you see on threads posters advising an OP that if her new boyfriend moves into her home he should not make a contribution towards the mortgage or significant home improvement as he could stake a claim on the equity. This would be on the beneficial/trust basis. A friend of mine had her ex assert a claim on her house on the basis he had done a complete require of the electrics on the understanding that he was adding to the equity and would benefit. (She settled with him by paying him the trade value of the work.)

So there is that route. BUT if he fights dirty it could be legally expensive and stressful.

I hope you work something out that protects your money. Sorry you are having a tough time.

BTW I'm a solicitor but not a property one!

He's entitled to half of everything I'm afraid.

OP, you must stop making assumptions and get some legal advice. As you are not married and have a paper trail of where the money came from (you) it is monumentally unlikely that your OH is suddenly entitled to half of the total assets held between you You said he is on the mortgage, is he on the deeds as well (or is that what you meant)? Was a declaration of trust made regarding the deposit? See a solicitor, take all your relevant paperwork and see what they say.