Raising NAMALT comments, or any sort of feminism = being ghosted

[WishingYouAMerryChristmasToo]

I don't do online -after multiple dick pics and ridiculous experiences.

I started dating an 'old' neighbour, not old in age, my age single, academic a former neighbour we both lived in the same village and have since moved-we had a lot in common -he asked me what I was doing one evening -I said I was plotting the storyline to a new book but this one was all woman -as I most recent books I'd read in this genre all had women being 'rescued' by the handsome vet/ next door neighbour etc all male. He replied 'but men are 50%' and I said 'yes but in this case I'm developing female characters, I don't like the idea of a woman expecting a man to rescue her -this woman gets her own problems sorted. He texted 'Not all men are like that ' I replied with a ? saying I wasn't taking about men but women. He asked me if I was 'one of those women' -I asked him to explain. He said 'not all men are taking over types etc' I again said it wasn't about men. He has ghosted me. After talking to me every day for a few months -I haven't heard from him for a couple of weeks. No reason.

I went on a few dates with another. Thought he was really kind. One date he told me he was sick of this 'men blaming culture' he is NAMALT and I said that's the point. Actually it's in everything male entitlement and not realising the fear we have. He said 'Women only get attacked if they aren't careful' eg not wearing short skirts etc -totally missed the SE case -as NAMALT. He must have realised it was finished but no apology and not back in touch (don't worry it's a vomit from me)

I'm feeling such a depression. I've spent 12 years alone apart for a 2 year relationship and marriage. I then spent 4 years alone and dated again -he was a cheater and a liar. Again I found friends telling me 'it was me attracting the wrong sort -or being too trusting'. I have boundaries but have yet to find a man who doesn't just shrug and gets it -gets my fear. gets my independence, doesn't want to change me etc..... it's always my fault for not finding said one. I have a full life, but yes I'd like a companion. But I'm thinking it's not going to happen for me. I have good boundaries and good confidence and I'm bright and intelligent. I just want an equal who respects and understands the violence woman are currently facing.

Where are they?

That’s a great post from @TheDailyCarbunkle
It really rings true

Tell me you're a Karen without telling me you're a Karen.....

Misogynist says what?

@Samedaysameshit

I don’t really recognise what The daily has said. Also I certainly do t want my grandfathers life. His job was crawling in an 18 inch seam in just his underpants due to it being nearly 100 degrees,digging coal with a pick axe. He started doing that at 42 as he needed the face workers premium. That after joining the army at 15 and spending 13 years in Burma. I’d rather do the school run and a few dishes thanks.

Women and children used to go down the mines here as well as men.

You miss the point anyway. It's about harking back to some simpler time, which the fantasy of sounds appealing.

Same as loads of other things where people Don rose tinted glasses about the past.

Don’t mean to derail this thread, but I don’t think the following statement is really true

It’s vanishingly rarely that I see men discussing the issues men face - violence, suicide, homelessness, adjusting to life after the forces - spontaneously. Far too many men only seem to raise these issues when they can use them as a means to shut women up from talking about misogyny

I feel that in the last few years men talking men’s issues has increased with events like the suicides of Gary Speed & Keith Flint, Movember, prostate cancer awareness events.

And the abuse in sports clubs and more.

That is all really good. Well not good but I'm pleased that there are men talking about sexual abuse as it's never been done before.

In real life though I have never heard a man talking about anything like that. Never that I can recall.

Although lots do movember. And then they compare moustaches rather than talk about the charity!

In fact the only time I hear it apart from the news etc.

Is on here when it's a thread about women's issues.

It's not about you @Choccy01

The more I read, hear, or see about the way men act and treat women, the more (for me) NAMALT has come to mean Nearly All Men Are Like That.

@roarfeckingroarr

It's not about you *@Choccy01*

I think with men like choccy.

The whole problem is that not everything revolves around them

Hence the utter outrage when any woman or group of women. Don't make sure that they focus entirely on what any man or men want them to

The calling women Karen thing does seem to be the go to
'play the man not the ball' thing from someone who has run out of spurious arguments.

@SpidersAreShitheads good post. Balanced and I agree with a lot of it

It can feel like you want to be an ally but are still lumped in with “the problem” sometimes. The race comparison is an interesting one.

Ah and there it is, the insult ‘Karen’, even in 2021 men still enjoy ridiculing women for having opinions. Don’t think any woman on this thread would be surprised, it was obvious from his first post that he’s a misogynist with no desire or ability to have a discussion with women that doesn’t centre men.

He can’t understand why ‘Karen ‘ is such a sexist term that he actually uses it in an attempt to defend himself against claims of mysogyny?
Lmao
Wow