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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Bf text I love you to

147 replies

Mistygeepurr · 26/09/2021 10:55

I had text of my bf saying I love u to.but I didn't message him it was like he was replying to a text of someone?

OP posts:
QueenBee52 · 27/09/2021 01:16

The text wasn't for you ... sorry

AnnieSnap · 27/09/2021 01:30

Surely if he was replying to someone else text, it would have gone to them. If he sent it to you, he’d have to come out of their text and pull you up to send it to you. Perhaps it was predictive text or something. If you have no other reason to doubt him, I wouldn’t catastrophise based only on this. Has he done anything else to make you suspicious?

Weegiewtf · 27/09/2021 01:59

Honestly stop listening to all the speculation.
You have 2 choices - call him out on it and see what he says or ignore it and forget about it. All the fancying about suggested by others reads more like they want you to have more drama to report back on here than anything helpful.

It’s entirely possible there’s an innocent explanation and it’s equally as possible there isn’t but only way you’ll find out is to ask or have a look at his phone

QueenBee52 · 27/09/2021 02:16

Surely if he was replying to someone else text, it would have gone to them.

Nope.. its very easy to reply to the wrong text

WTF475878237NC · 27/09/2021 02:29

There is no 'type'; Mumsnet is full of threads from completely blindsided people who trusted their partners with their life, and heart.

There are many threads on here where the cheater text their spouse instead of their lover.

Just ask yourself does he normally next me I love you messages at random? Does he normally put a kiss at the end?

You are right of course that people who cheat are pathological liars who compartmentalise so well they don't even flinch when they lie. Confronting him won't help here, unless he wants to leave you because he is actually in love with her.

Eve81 · 27/09/2021 03:55

Are you sure he wasn’t being sarcastic and say ‘love you too’ when you hadn’t text him?

PurpleSapphire · 27/09/2021 04:29

Sarcasm was my first thought as pp said, or does your name begin with a T and predictive text could have changed it? Something similar actually happened to me (I was the sender) and I was totally innocent but I was really pissed off that instead of just asking me, my partner was funny with me about it..it hurt my feelings and made me rethink everything knowing he didn't trust me, so be careful how you approach it is my advice.

shesellsseacats · 27/09/2021 05:42

Do you have any other devices be uses at home? (Or do you know his Google password?)

Google timeline shows where you have been, Google tracks your phone's location unless you have location switched off and keeps a record. Most people don't realise it's doing this!

Have a look here to see your own history of where you've been. www.google.com/maps/timeline

If you can go on Google Chrome on a device he uses at home, maybe a laptop or tablet, it will show where he's been with his phone, even if you don't have access to the actual phone.

If you can do this, you can see if he's actually been at work on Saturdays.

Gymohithoughtyousaidgin · 27/09/2021 05:59

@Ilovesandwiches

My autocorrect always makes me add but to the end of random sentences, could it be similar?
Off topic but my auto correct is awful. I told someone I love their tatts (tattoos) and it auto corrected to tits 😑

I wouldn't assume he's cheating. Just a typo I think

bubbleKey · 27/09/2021 06:02

I'd say to him: what was that text you sent me supposed to say?

If he says what it said,then maybe just laugh about the missing o.

If he acts like he doesn't know about any text he sent you, then I'd be suspicious.

RH1234 · 27/09/2021 06:17

It always amazes me how many of you on here automatically jump on the "he's cheating", "get rid", "check his phone" etc.

It's no wonder blokes have left you and treated you that way, clearly they feel so insecure or inferior due to your behaviour.

Everyone constantly is saying 'Be Kind', support each other, but all you'll have done is fuel a fire, that potentially is nothing, but the poor OP now thinks her partner isn't even working on a Saturday as they're meeting someone. Doesn't take a genius to figure out if he's meeting someone else, he wouldn't have text them at the same time?

I joined MN to literally check if there was anything me and my wife might need to consider for our little girl; yet it's just full of bitter twisted people half the time that resent their partners / lives. (Excluding those looking for advice on abusive relationships etc). Not all men are the monsters described.

To the OP, I hope it was just a typo that they sent to you. The most sensible thing to do would be to just ask him. He will obviously say it was a mistake, it's then up to you to decide if you trust him enough to remain.

QueenBee52 · 27/09/2021 06:27

@RH1234

It always amazes me how many of you on here automatically jump on the "he's cheating", "get rid", "check his phone" etc.

It's no wonder blokes have left you and treated you that way, clearly they feel so insecure or inferior due to your behaviour.

Everyone constantly is saying 'Be Kind', support each other, but all you'll have done is fuel a fire, that potentially is nothing, but the poor OP now thinks her partner isn't even working on a Saturday as they're meeting someone. Doesn't take a genius to figure out if he's meeting someone else, he wouldn't have text them at the same time?

I joined MN to literally check if there was anything me and my wife might need to consider for our little girl; yet it's just full of bitter twisted people half the time that resent their partners / lives. (Excluding those looking for advice on abusive relationships etc). Not all men are the monsters described.

To the OP, I hope it was just a typo that they sent to you. The most sensible thing to do would be to just ask him. He will obviously say it was a mistake, it's then up to you to decide if you trust him enough to remain.

And yet here you still are.. using Mumsnet .. 😂

RH1234 · 27/09/2021 06:36

At no point did I say I'm fed up with it, more that it "amazes me" at how shockingly unsupportive a lot of you are.

Arepeoplereallycoolaboutthis · 27/09/2021 06:56

Just wondering if it was a passive aggressive "love you too" ? Like when you step aside and wait for someone to pass, but they don't thank you and you want to sarcastically say "you're welcome"...

Is he annoyed with you about something? Obviously if it is a passive message it is childish. But a different outcome than cheating.

TheFoundations · 27/09/2021 06:58

Whether he's innocent or not, the relationship is unhealthy because you don't feel you can trust him. All this talk of 'catching him out' and 'checking where he is' is symptomatic of deeper problems. If it was a healthy relationship, you would have simply approached him about it, rather than posting on a forum for suggestions from hundreds of strangers about what he might be doing.

You've said that if you approach him about it, you're sure he'll lie. That should be game over for the relationship. Raise your bar.

MyOtherProfile · 27/09/2021 06:59

Did you say anything?

MacMahon · 27/09/2021 07:18

Just say 'what was with that random text you sent me earlier?'

This.

CandidaAlbicans2 · 27/09/2021 07:27

Surely if he was replying to someone else text, it would have gone to them. If he sent it to you, he’d have to come out of their text and pull you up to send it to you. Perhaps it was predictive text or something

That's what I think too @AnnieSnap. No idea about other phones but mine doesn't allow me to open more than 1 text at a time, so I wouldn't be able to reply to the wrong person. It would be so obvious who I was replying to anyway so I'm struggling to see how it could happen. Much more likely to be a typo or a passive aggressive message as a PP said (like the "you're welcome" when someone doesn't say thank you).

Bombaloorina · 27/09/2021 07:29

[quote girlmom21]@someonesomewhere7 what if she finds nothing? She'll just convince herself he's good at covering tracks.

I'd never check my DP's phone unless I was prepared to walk away from the relationship. It's a massive invasion of privacy. [/quote]
Totally agree.

If you’ve got to the point of checking phones, it’s over.

Subbaxeo · 27/09/2021 07:33

Why don’t you ask him instead of randoms on mumsnet?

liveforsummer · 27/09/2021 07:33

@CandidaAlbicans2

Surely if he was replying to someone else text, it would have gone to them. If he sent it to you, he’d have to come out of their text and pull you up to send it to you. Perhaps it was predictive text or something

That's what I think too @AnnieSnap. No idea about other phones but mine doesn't allow me to open more than 1 text at a time, so I wouldn't be able to reply to the wrong person. It would be so obvious who I was replying to anyway so I'm struggling to see how it could happen. Much more likely to be a typo or a passive aggressive message as a PP said (like the "you're welcome" when someone doesn't say thank you).

It's something that happens when you are texting multiple people at once and you just forget which screen you are on. OP hasn't answered whether it wound be normal for her partner to send a text simply saying I love you. I agree the fact there is this level of suspicion, feeling sure he'll lie and needing to think of ways to catch him out over something that could have a perfectly innocent explanation is more telling of where they are at than the message it's self
GetOffTheTableMabel · 27/09/2021 07:33

@bubbleKey

I'd say to him: what was that text you sent me supposed to say?

If he says what it said,then maybe just laugh about the missing o.

If he acts like he doesn't know about any text he sent you, then I'd be suspicious.

This makes sense. If he pressed send too soon or if it was supposed to say something else then he’ll be able to answer straight away. If he needs much thinking time, it’s probably dodgy.

I was wondering if he meant “I love you two’, meaning you and your baby?

Yogsgirl · 27/09/2021 07:41

He could have been texting his mum?

Ourlady · 27/09/2021 07:58

Bloody hell, you are in a relationship, living together, there's no need for all the cloak and dagger Miss Marple shenanigans!
Just ask him what his text meant. There's probably a very simple explanation.

AFuturisticalSound · 27/09/2021 08:09

@CandidaAlbicans2

Surely if he was replying to someone else text, it would have gone to them. If he sent it to you, he’d have to come out of their text and pull you up to send it to you. Perhaps it was predictive text or something

That's what I think too @AnnieSnap. No idea about other phones but mine doesn't allow me to open more than 1 text at a time, so I wouldn't be able to reply to the wrong person. It would be so obvious who I was replying to anyway so I'm struggling to see how it could happen. Much more likely to be a typo or a passive aggressive message as a PP said (like the "you're welcome" when someone doesn't say thank you).

I've realised that I wouldn't be able to text the wrong person either unless I'd closed the previous text and opened a new one, there just isn't any way to have multiple texts open at the same time

Maybe there is an innocent explanation