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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

He told her he loved her

51 replies

Dreadingggit · 21/09/2021 15:03

So I’ve been with my boyfriend for just over a year. I have posted a couple of days ago because to me he’s just been ‘off’. Anyway he’s insisted that he was fine.

He has a young child with another woman. He told me they were casually sleeping together and she fell pregnant, he didn’t want the baby but she kept it anyway. They were never together in a relationship. He hasn’t told her about me because he claims she will stop him seeing their child, they do seem to get on most of the time. Sometimes he would be so angry and rant to me when they argued, however she would always let him see their child. He said he couldn’t deal with seeing his child because he grew up without a dad, so telling her about me kind of fell by the wayside. They keep in contact most days.

Anyway, him and I were discussing taking our relationship to the next level, moving in etc. He told me to look on his phone because he had favourited some flats for us to look at. A message from his child’s mother came through saying “ haha why are you saying that, what do you want?” I clicked the message I know I should not have and they had been talking since about 6am this morning, joking etc. He said I love you lots, to which she asked him what he wants.

I’m so shocked really, he always implied they weren’t close, he never had a relationship with her they slept together three times. Now I asked him and he said of course he loves her as the mother of his child. I don’t really understand that and I can’t work out whether I’m being unreasonable.

So so long so if anyone has read the full thing thank you

OP posts:
Monstertrucks · 22/09/2021 16:15

How you doing OP?

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