Things you hate about Online Dating....

[OnwardsEverStridingOnwards]

Just for a laugh, I thought I'd start a thread about the bad and the ugly of OLD...

Here's mine:

1. When men have a picture of a then holding a child on their profile, and then say 'oh, by the way, it's not mine, I promise.' Why include it if it's someone else's?

1. When men say 'if you want to know anything, just ask.' I'm sorry, ask what? You haven't given me anything to ask about!

1. When men just write their social media details on their profile with the words 'add me' and nothing else. No thank you. I'm not a love island contestant.

Looking forward to hearing everyone else's

@Thisisworsethananticpated There should be a thread just on the topic of work meetings. How many there are in some organisations, the political-type waffling where you realise you've been listening to people for an hour making statements (but no action plan) and repeating what the other person said, just in a different way.

@Thisisworsethananticpated
Do you mansplain ?

🤷🏼‍♂️, probably

Do you talk over colleagues in meetings and use terms like ‘strategic intent ‘ and talk for hours about non essential issues to avoid facing the elephant on the table
No, don’t get invited to many meetings, anymore, I tend to tell people things they don’t want to hear.

If not you should be ok !

Ah brexit has done me no favours !!!!

One positive thing I find about online dating is that it sure does keep me humble All the things that men do, women do too, and I like to believe that Mr Shirtless Lying on a Bed All-a-Smoulder will find love with Miss Large Bright Eyes and Her Halo of Tiny Colourful BIrds. So, I try not to hate but do raise an eyebrow at:

The number of women that call themselves 'Wonder Woman'. Do blokes call themselves Superman or Batman too ?

While I'm on names ... so many Lou's that are Loopy ... and Elvira seems a surprisingly common name amongst 47-53 year olds.

Animal print. Is this the go to for added "me tarzan, you jane!" profile appeal or am I just not on trend here ?

Pics with celebs. Or waxwork celebs.

Each pic absolutely identical (also guarantees no profile text).

Saying you have your own eyebrows. Believe me, we can see from the pictures.

Always the last picture of the set is the most realistic (because it's of a pet).

That’s made me laugh hairy arsed !
If I ever dare to venture back I’ll avoid leopard skin 😂

I was feeling a bit uncomfortable about my comments and if online dating turns me into a man hater that’s totally and utterly counter productive
I have two sons after all and I do like men !
Just not the ones on tinder

Yes to all these 😁
Years ago when I did OLD I was approached by a man who'd only written "ask if you want to know anything" in his profile. No info, no effort. Of course he made very little effort when contacting me either 🙄 But I decided to play along and when I queried why his profile was blank, and he said "what would you like to know", I sent him all the questions on the profile set-up section 😁 He didn't reply 😆 I think he was assuming his 6 pack would do the talking for him 🙄

It's the passive aggressive ones that get me

" Don't bother replying if you not over your ex , like playing games or have more baggage than Heathrow "
Well hello to you too stranger 🤨

I know I've told this before so I'm sorry if it bores you but still makes me chuckle today

I had an 84 year old once ask me the size of my tits 🤣 his exact words !
I only replied out of politeness to his message request and when he said can I ask a question I was expecting would you date someone my age ( I'm 55 and my dad is 77 )
Really didn't know if I should laugh or cry
Wee devil 🤭

notlongtillxmas

I had a 74 year old ask me if I ‘did afternoons’

🤣

@Thisisworsethananticpated please tell me you replied something witty like " only in between Countdown and Tenables "

You had an 84 year old message you?

How old are you?!

I'm 55 @Marni83

If you’re messages by an 84 year old
What age did you filter your interest in???

I'm a young 55 too 😂 the site I was on asked you to put a dating range - mine was 50-58 ..
I had another slight misunderstanding that made me giggle when a man same age asked me if I was 66 or 65 baby .. I was a bit offended until he explained he was asking if I was 1966 or 1965 born 😂 luckily I didn't give him an earful

notlongtillxmas
I was so horrified ( same age as my dad !!) I left the website forever !!!!!

@Thisisworsethananticpated I've also let my subscription lapse now and don't think I'll try it again
However live in hope that a kind of normal man might one day meet a kind of normal woman and we might be able to make it work .

Think I went off OLD when a random man decided to tell my I was selfish for still wanting kids at 35 as I was too old. Am 43 now and given up on the relationship bit for now to focus on the baby bit (IVF) Life is too short to waste time being abused by strangers simply for your previous relationships not turning out the way you’d hoped!

What the posters above said:

Pictures with fish.

Pictures with kids who are not yours. I really hope you asked for their parents'consent.

Topless pictures, or worse - underwear pics. Ugh.

Mirror selfies - come on now, you can do better than this. Very low effort.

Multiple gym photos - ....

Pulling silly faces, sticking the tongue out - so unattractive in adult men.

Low quality selfies that looks like they were taken with a potato. Maybe they were.

Now onto description:

Passive aggressive comments ("if you don't talk, I WILL UNMATCH!!", "If you don't look like your pictures, you're buying drinks until you do!" - how about the other way round?).

The age "mistake". Especially bad if there's no mention in the profile and you find out later, to which they say "Oh I was sure I mentioned it". Yeah, no. And later "I feel and look younger than my age". But you're still old.

Instagram handle.

Spelling mistakes (your/you're etc.) - little things that matter.

Own house, own car, own teeth - clap clap, just sounds like you're boring tbf.

@givinglessfucksdaily

Shall we start a new thread about " what is the alternative to OLD ? " as we all seem to feel pretty rubbish about it all ?

I'd find that helpful - I don't OLD and that's primarily because of the experiences I read about on MN.

Mirror selfies - come on now, you can do better than this. Very low effort.

I would estimate that more than 50% of women’s profiles I have looked at use mirror selfie’s

Goes for both sexes!

I've reread my own post and it sounded pretty bitter. Probably because the above are so repetitive, and when you've been there long enough, it starts getting under your skin.

As for alternatives to OLD, I think Meet Up is a good starting point. Or, if you're brave enough, striking up conversations in situations where there's already some common element in place e.g dog parks, hiking trails (asking for directions), museums/galleries, football games, sports clubs etc.

Alternatively speed dating grin but I'm yet to try, so no opinion on that.

But thinking about it I do notice that quite a lot of women use mirrors to take full length pictures, as obviously your arms are only so long, I was looking at the profile of a lady a little while back, she had 2 full length mirror pictures she also had a dog (I like dogs) and looked great, unfortunately was a bit too far away really,

I always used full-length photos taken by someone else, as I didn't want to look like Jenny No-Friends!

I mean, a mirror selfie (unless topless) is not a deal-breaker, especially if it's creative and the face is not covered, but I'm not a big fan in general. There are so many opportunities for having your pictures taken by friends/family or even strangers when you do stuff you love doing - which the profile should highlight.

@JustAnother0ldMan

But thinking about it I do notice that quite a lot of women use mirrors to take full length pictures, as obviously your arms are only so long, I was looking at the profile of a lady a little while back, she had 2 full length mirror pictures she also had a dog (I like dogs) and looked great, unfortunately was a bit too far away really,

Maybe message her and ask if she can take a picture closer to the mirror ?

Seriously, I find so few positive swipes I've reconsidered lately on distance. I can tolerate an hour of driving from home or work.

@HairyArsedMan
Ha !, yes about 60 miles closer would be good.
But, yes, totally agree, so few decent profiles locally (to me anyhow), that opening up the distance is a serious consideration

@JustAnother0ldMan @HairyArsedMan I quite like the distance thing
Interesting use of the word " tolerate " there lol
If they on your doorstep there's always a chance of them turning up unexpectedly when you are face deep in Ben and Jerry's with hairy legs and 3 day old pyjamas
I wonder why I am single
However with a little distance this perfectly groomed domestic goodness will probably still be face deep in Ben and Jerry but happy to share
Probably no hope for me 😂