My mum hates and is jealous of my sister

[Simplicity1011]

Ever since we was little my mum has never liked my sister, from things like locking her in cupboards and dark rooms to make her stop crying, from cutting her hair to teach her a lesson to stop trimming her hair, to not letting her go on school trips to her end of year school play, to making us hide from her in the park so my sister thought we had all left her..
To things like saying she shows off when she walks and acts up for my dad.. to not letting her put her drink in the fridge to things like saying she shows off when she buys herself ice cream so my sister stoped buying things like that. Basically every little thing my sister done my mum had a problem with it.. right till this day..
She has told my sis she’s the reason her and my dads marriage is broken.. the list goes on..
She also said she feels nothing for my sis
I just want to know what is wrong with my mum and why she is like this ..

Sorry is your sister also close to your Dad.

I’d say she is closer to my dad than mum, like when my mum wouldn’t want her in the house she would go with my dad and at times my dad would stick up for her

That sounds so familiar.

Does you Dad and Sister have similar traits and do they both have similar qualities that your Mom doesn't?

Yeah you know, like, a soul
?
xD

It is true though that sometimes abusers have a preferred type of person to abuse eg: really nice people, people who are idealistic, confident and happy (because they hate happiness and self confidence in others) or people who are already shy, meek and under confident, people pleasers (easy targets). But really, they aren't fussy. And if they start the abuse on a child, then of course a child is always an easy target.

* on universal credit my parents would take £100 from her and leave her with hardly anything to survive for the rest of the month*

^Your parents are disgusting

@drpet49 they take the money bc none of them work and they need the extra cash and they don’t want to work themselves

Your sister may well be classed as a ‘vulnerable adult’. I’d contact social services and ask their advice.

Can’t you and your sister move out and live together. Support each other and go zero contact with her? She’s abusive. She’s disgusting. Get help. Help your sister. Well done for recognising this

@Craftycorvid

Your sister may well be classed as a ‘vulnerable adult’. I’d contact social services and ask their advice.

Yes please do this OP.

That is so so sad, your poor ds. I. Hope you are both nc.

Please please contact Social Services and ask for advice. Your mother has abused her horribly and is continuing to do so. It's really good that you are supporting her and showing her you will be there when she's ready to walk away from your mum for good, but she is likely to also need professional help after what she's been through.

Please keep supporting her, and look after yourself as well.

Would it help to give her something to read about scapegoats/golden child etc? Im sure. recommendations could be given on here. Also, are you able to help her come with a plan to move so she is not under your ‘d’m control that way?

The more I read, the sadder it is.

OP, you have a real chance of absolutely turning your sister's life around here and giving her a chance of a good life - of proper growth and love and independence.

Please report them to SS or at least seek professional help for her.

Other pp's have said to contact social services. I'd go further, and report this despicable abuser to the police.

What a sad story OP.
I’d contact adult safeguarding in social services. Your sister is a victim of abuse and controlling/ co-ercive behaviour.
There may be enough information for a joint police/ social services investigation

This sounds like someone needs to contact the police. Your poor, poor sister. This made me feel sick to read.

My sister won’t listen to me guys, she will always listen to my mum.. she is now saying she has to get married as she of age but once she gets married my mum will bully her even more and say stuff like she’s showing off with her husband. Whatever my sis does, it’s always that she’s showing off.. my sister has only just these past 4/5 months been able to choose her own clothes and buy what she likes with the little money she has so her deciding to move out will definitely not be for now.. 😭

@FlumpsAreShit it’s Absolutely horrible and I haven’t even mentioned half of the stuff my mum has done to her when we were younger. Pure evil. It’s the stuff you see on those documentaries 😞

@Simplicity1011 have you and your sister had a conversation about this? What have you said and how did she respond?

This is pretty awful to read. I think we all want to help you, help her. We really need to get her out.

I mentioned the possibility of counselling today to her and she just changed the subject 🙁

@BlackAlys we will talk about it and she will tell me all the horrible stuff that has been said to her and how she gets a sickly feeling whenever she gets a phone call from my mum bc she knows what’s coming.. my sis knows that what my mum is doing is not bc of her but bc there’s something wrong with my mum.. and that’s how far we’ve got into all of this

Ring your local council.. They have a section that deals with vulnerable adults... Your dsis is being abused..
Please try every avenue of support on her behalf...

[quote Simplicity1011]@BlackAlys we will talk about it and she will tell me all the horrible stuff that has been said to her and how she gets a sickly feeling whenever she gets a phone call from my mum bc she knows what’s coming.. my sis knows that what my mum is doing is not bc of her but bc there’s something wrong with my mum.. and that’s how far we’ve got into all of this[/quote]
She's dependent on her which is really worrying.

@BlackAlys even tho now she is living in such horrible conditions in my nans house, I’m so happy that Atleast she’s out of my mums house where she was constantly walking on egg shells and made to feel like she was the problem every single day of her life. Now I invite her over to mines and I make her do fun things with me just as simple as watching a movie together or dancing around my house

[quote Simplicity1011]@BlackAlys even tho now she is living in such horrible conditions in my nans house, I’m so happy that Atleast she’s out of my mums house where she was constantly walking on egg shells and made to feel like she was the problem every single day of her life. Now I invite her over to mines and I make her do fun things with me just as simple as watching a movie together or dancing around my house[/quote]
That's fantastic. Keep doing what you're doing. You are showing her life outside of the abusive environment and the hope is that she will slowly 'learn' what healthy relationships should look like.