Will social services take her children away?

[Breastfeedingworries]

Hi okay going to keep this as brief as I can because I need some sleep and rest. It’s been an emotional day. Will try and keep vague as I can without much details as don’t want to give situation away. Promise it isn’t myself or a reverse or whatever.

This is reguarding a new friend of mine I haven’t known long.

She was told she couldn’t see an ex (abusive, both of them to each other but she had been in two previous abusive relationships and I do believe in those cases she was the victim) she has two young children, 2,4 both of their dads were abusive.

Anyway she was told she had to tell them when/if she wanted to get back with ex or see him. (He isn’t the father of either child) She did tell them they were planning to get back together. Social services then said okay they would need to do a review and investigation. She naïvely took what they said as permission to go ahead. So she took her children to stay with him.

Things escalated badly, which ended with her fleeing with the children. (Will try and add more detail here as the thread goes on, just wanting to make sure I’m not too outing)
He’s now actually reported her.
She’s got a meeting tomorrow and me and a friend are going to support her.

I just want to get an idea of what could happen to prepare her for the worst. I really want to be a good friend, frankly I never thought I’d be in this situation to ask. Mumsnet is a wonderful place for advice.

[quote CutePanda]@Claypotkitchentable OP has not mentioned any names or provided any information that could identify the woman and her DC. Unfortunately, there are loads of DC living in abusive homes, neglected by their parents who prioritise their series of partners.[/quote]
She’s clearly a very selfish woman who prioritises her own needs before those of her children. Hopefully the children will be removed before further damage can be done. It’s a very sad situation for the children and as you say, it’s going on up and down the country every day.

Those poor children. Breaks my heart.

You’re very kind to want to help but this woman sounds like a liability. Treat her as an addict-they lie, they manipulate and they double cross. She’s addicted to these types of men and will put her addiction first and you will get dragged into it so my advice is - run for the hills

@Breastfeedingworries

Yes, well in fairness I knew her previous ex was the father to her son and that he’d been abusive. She’d struggled leaving him and had a section 47 before which I hadn’t known.the social worker made it clear she’d made the same promises before and broke them. Me and my other friend agreed even though we care about her we’d put the children first. We made a pact we would report if we knew of her being in contact again.

So this 'friend' has been pulling the wool over your eyes and deceived you? Seriously drop this friendship before she drags you into even more of her drama.

So this woman got in a fight with the ex , the mother attacked her, she punched the mother and he strangled her.

Is this for real? This woman has shown a terrible lack of judgement here, to have gone to spend time with an abusive ex AND taken her DC with her. They obviously witnessed this, how terrifying for them. She’s an adult if she wants to subject herself to this type of abuse that’s her right , but she doesn’t get to drag her DC into that situation
If she can’t or won’t put her DC first then SS should step in and take over,