@Aliceclara
I think actions say it all. Are you wanting to say 'I love you' but it hasn't yet been said? Give us some examples of the actions which seem to show he cares.
I don't know tbh. At this point, I just want him to say
something!
OK.
We see each other every weekend and very occasionally in the week. In some contact every day or so. We were bf/gf for almost a year and I ended it because I felt uncertain of what it was and had started to doubt he actually even liked me. We didn't see each other for a few weeks and then started hanging out as friends as we were a bubble. Over the next couple of months, contact increased to previous levels. We do have sex but not every time we see each other. There's no pressure amd spending time together going out and doing things is prioritised over staying in and having sex.
My car broke down last summer. He did all the driving for 6 weeks without complaint, spent a lot of time looking for a suitable replacement and then drove across the country to look at cars with me. He said a few months later that, at the time, he felt I'd taken him for granted a bit. I told him constantly that I appreciated all he was doing but he was definitely more proactive than me in finding a replacement and I think that is what he meant.
We have a similar hobby and when he replaced a piece of kit recently, he gave me his old one. There was nothing wrong with it but he does the hobby on a more 'professional' scale than me and it didn't meet his needs anymore. I've been invited along with him to events when only 'partners' went otherwise.
He is supportive of me and very encouraging but without being complimentary.
I have a 15 year old daughter and he makes a huge effort with her so she don't feel left out. He suggested we all went out for the day together a couple of weeks ago. It was a long drive and one I wasn't really comfortable making given the heat. He only has a 2 seater so offered to do the drive there and back in my car, sorted out snacks, made sure my daughter had everything she needed and was comfortable. Then she was a bit typically 15 when we got there and after all the effort was difficult to engage but he spent a lot of time encouraging her when he might have just thought she was being ungrateful and been irritated. The result was that I ended up with some lovely photos of him doing an activity with her and she enjoyed it in a way she might not have without his input.
He invited me round to watch the football final with his friends. Checked I was OK the whole evening (wasn't ignored for the blokes) and sat next to me and held my hand. He's not really one for hand holding in front of others to the point where I had begun to think he was embarrassed to be seen with me when we were seeing each other.
There are loads of similar examples. He does lots of 'little things' I guess.
He has only actually told me he cares about me once - after we'd split up when I said I wasn't sure he even liked me.
We did have a chat a few weeks ago when he said he felt uncertain of thngs because I'd ended it. I said I'd only ended it because of the lack of affection and not knowing how he felt. He said he should probably make more of an effort then and, tbf, he has.
It's not that I need a lot of affection and in previous relationships haven't needed it but I've never felt that I didn't have a context either. I think that's what is lacking - a context.
He doesn't find it easy or comfortable to talk about feelings or 'the relationship' and, tbh, i don't either so it's not that i want to endlessly navel gaze about 'us' but just a context to underpin the actions or an indication of his thoughts/feelings would be nice.