Dating someone who had an affair when he was married

[Gottahavefaith86]

Hello MN
Haven't posted on here for a very long time.
Single for years! Quite a lot of online dating along the way but have never met anyone great.
'Final' online date 3 weeks ago as was about to give up hope. Had low expectations and met this guy who I quickly thought was pretty amazing. Chemistry, generous, funny etc etc. Separated from his wife last year.
Told me in the first hour of the date that he had an affair for 6 months last year - relationship not great for years - then they ended things & his wife has since met someone else.
They both live at the family home (him half there half with a friend) for the sake of the kids/childcare. Randomly a friend knows them (found out last week) & knows that all the above is true.
Even though he told me about the affair on date 1, I didn't leave, I did ask a few questions & I have seen him twice since. I feel really attracted to him & we are texting loads/chatting/planning to meet again next week.
MN, is this a stupid move? If he's had an affair before, will this inevitably happen again if things move forward?
The fact he was upfront surprised me.
I've never cheated & struggle to understand how someone can.
It's the only thing I'm uncomfortable with.
Big red flag? See how it goes?
I'm completely in two minds.
Any insight/advice/guidance welcome 🙏🏽

Hello OP.
This is only a few dates in, isn't it? So I think it depends on what you want. If to really meet someone for a proper relationship I'd say no. But if you fancy a few evenings with him, and he's good company, then I don't see why not. His moral situation is not your problem unless you want a real relationship with him. It depends on what sort of person you are, but perhaps he'd be fun for a weekend only.

I don't think I could carry on. As pp said earlier. I'd lose all respect for someone and wouldn't trust them going forward.

I couldn't carry on, he has showed he is comfortable cheating on someone he loves. Not just a ONS either (i also would leave for that too) but a 6 month term of lies and deceit.

Could you trust him when things get tough? Will you wonder, when he's a bit quiet, what he's up to? Will you check his phone amd question his every move? I know i wouldn't set myself up for this and so I would say walk away now before you're too involved

For me, the cheating is less important than his attitude to the cheating. If I were to consider dating someone with a history of cheating, I would have to be satisfied that he understood why he had done it, accepted responsibility for it and had given some thought as to how to make sure it wouldn't happen again. That he had worked on himself - and that takes time and guts.

So soon after a relationship ending, I probably wouldn't, OP, especially with the complex living situation. But if you are truly smitten, at least take things slow and find out these things as you go.

@bathsh3ba

For me, the cheating is less important than his attitude to the cheating. If I were to consider dating someone with a history of cheating, I would have to be satisfied that he understood why he had done it, accepted responsibility for it and had given some thought as to how to make sure it wouldn't happen again. That he had worked on himself - and that takes time and guts.

So soon after a relationship ending, I probably wouldn't, OP, especially with the complex living situation. But if you are truly smitten, at least take things slow and find out these things as you go.

As someone who was cheated on in a previous relationship, what @bathsh3ba says 100%