I know it's late but please help if you can

[LucyCielo]

Tonight went out with df (getting married next month). I mentioned something that he thought was a dig at his family and he then pushed me off my chair in the middle of quite a posh bar. Everyone seen this and some kind random man had to help me up. He has since apologised but I am still not sure whether this is something I should put up with. Any advice?

Oh no. Oh sh*t. I was dreading this might happen.

I can't bear it when someone doesn't make it and ends up going back to a bastard, just because he apologises.

We tried, girls, we tried.

She has made her decision albeit a tragic one for her and her DD.
I don't think what we say will make a bit of difference now - these sorts of guys are very manipulative and clever, they know what words to say to push all the right buttons with vulnerable women with low self-worth.

Our advice can't compete with that. sadly.

At least she was far enough along to post on MN about her very real doubts.
I guess a lot of abused women never even get that far. So perhaps we might stay at the back of her mind, if she starts to doubt again...[hopeful]

Poor child is what I am thinking but loath to write.

If only we could have convinced her we are nice, normal people who have been there and are hurting to see someone make our mistakes.

Dear Lucy,
Must be really difficult reading these posts. Please don't let anyone convince you you are a bad mother.Most of us don't have first hand experience of what you are going through but we have to point out the obvious and that is your daughter is as much at risk as you are in this sort of relationship.
Please please enlist your family's support.If not for you, for her.

..I hope my comment didn;'t come across as saying she was a bad mother - far from it, a very brave one to even post n here...I think she is afraid, that's all. which makes me want to help her not be afraid.

Lucy I hope you are Ok. x

Columbia, sorry I do realise my comment comes accross as an attack on those who commented on lucy's DD. Really was not my intention.
I did too and feel sorry for her. The man she's planning to marry is the father of her DD after all and there is no indication here that he's anything but caring so far.
I just thought she's got enough on her plate as it is , she should not be made to embark on another self devaluating guilt trip.
Take care Lucy.

Sorry Slim, I didn't mean it that way I felt bad that I had been so 'cross' with the OP and it might have come across in my posts...I am not really cross with her but frustrated. I know if I had read these answers in her position I would find it very hard to trust us lot, rather than carry on with what was happening in real life...I just hope she will find her own way to see what's going on and look after herself...I will be thinking of her. Perhaps she will be fortunate and he will not get any worse. I'd be really, really glad if that was the case.