He's cooking - what to bring?

[overthinker121]

I've been dating a guy for a few weeks and he has invited me for dinner tomorrow (well actually today now seeing as it's past midnight!) I am awake fretting about what I should bring as I don't want to turn up empty handed. He is trying to be careful with what he eats/drinks at the moment so, whilst I would usually bring beer/wine/chocolates etc it would be a bit thoughtless to do that. What could I bring instead? It doesn't seem appropriate to bring flowers as he has a bit of a lad's pad. Any ideas very welcome!

I’d just take flowers anyway. ‘I know you don’t want chocs, if noones brought flowers before everyone should get flowers once!’ You might need to improvise on the vase.

A houseplant, fruit salad for desert or some other heathy pudding

I took flowers with me the first time my DH cooked for me.
Note he is now DH so it went down OK
Enjoy the evening/lunch

Elderflower fizz or similar
A starter

Orchid in pot. Dead easy to look after and the flowers last for ages.
Also bottle of wine but with no expectation that he open it then and there.

Thank you for all your suggestions!

Why not ask him? "I'm planning on bringing something along to the dinner, what would be most useful for me to bring?". That way you've been thoughtful and even if he doesn't want to answer, he will appreciate it. You're stuck trying to think what to bring anyway so there's no harm.

To be honest, I doubt he'll really care; a lot of guys use dinner at their homes at this stage if they're looking for sex so I would be more concerned about thinking how you feel about all this and how you want to approach it and what you need to make clear to him beforehand about what he shouldn't be expecting.

If he's not previously known to you, make sure you tell someone else about your whereabouts and rough time you expect to be home because if you've only "known" him for a matter of weeks, he's still a virtual stranger and you'll be very vulnerable at his house.

Some nice fruit for pudding - strawberries, raspberries, blueberries - that sort of thing.

@dateXY said everything I was thinking. Bring condoms!

Don’t take flowers, fruit for dessert as PP said and a bottle of something fizzy but alcohol free

A Chopin Peace Lily plant is a great gift.

It is so hardy and forgiving of being neglected.

No flowers 🤦‍♀️ So cringe

Flowers isn’t ‘cringe’ at all.

It is when “dinner at my house” is actually code for sex, flowers are going to look so ott with someone you’ve been dating a few weeks.

Take a peace lily, healthy dessert, appropriate drinks and condoms (if that's what you want, or to have thought it through if you don't!)

I guess if one considers flowers to be the height of romance... Which I don’t. I think they’re nice, that’s all. But I’ve just re-read op and OP says she doesn’t think flowers would be appropriate so that’s fair enough since she actually knows the guy!

I second the suggestion of some fruit for dessert.

Another vote for "not flowers" but I've never been into them and have never known a man who is.

Why is he watching what he eats and drinks - is he in training, just trying to get healthier, off booze? You can get fancy-looking non-alcoholic beers, gins, cocktails and other stuff in bottles these days (I can't vouch for how nice they actually are, but I'd see if I could find a posh mocktail of some sort). Fruit is a good idea too. When one of my friends stopped drinking, she used to go to a shop that sold exotic fruit and bring along something that looked unusual (dragonfruit, persimmons, lots of weird and wonderful stuff), and even if no one knew exactly what to do with it, it was a fun talking point.

I don’t think they are the height of romance I think it will look a bit cheesy

Surely it’s only cheesy if one considers them a romantic gesture...otherwise it’s just flowers to brighten a dinner table.

Meh I don’t even know why I’m arguing about this! Enjoy your evening @overthinker121! Don’t overthink it. 😉

If he’s not drinking, then maybe a good quality, low-calorie soft drink. Personally I’d bring a great tonic water.

Hmm I think flowers are ok but not that exciting really.

When you say trying to watch what he eats/drinks - what do you mean? Because if he's not specifically giving up alcohol, a bottle of wine is still a good neutral gift. You don't have to drink it all, it could easily be part of a normal 'healthy' meal.

Ohter than that, plenty of good food options. Lovely olives from nice deli and fancy cheese is healthy and good low-carb, for example and would be perfect instead of dessert or as a starter.

You can get more male oriented bouquets

A chilly plant - hot and firey !!

chilli plant even!!

I actually would have suggested cheese, olives and wine, but for the mention of watching his diet. Mind each of those are still fine in moderation unless he’s said he doesn’t want to drink, so you could still go with that. Could always do grapes instead of wine.