Would you go on this date? Red flags ?

[walkigonsuncc]

I started talking to a guy a week ago and we have a date arranged tomorrow (meal and drinks)
He has been annoying me past couple of days ..I don't know if I'm just being picky.
Some of the things he has said...

I like a woman who makes a effort to impress her man,nice hair,nice nails,always looks her best.
Would you kiss on a first date? Do you think I have nice lips.

Then he went on to say tonight (trying to flirt I think)
What's your plans tomorrow?anything fun(wink face)
So I just replied "washing my hair ha ha"
He replied ...
"Oh you washing that hair to impress me,are you painting your nails too?"

I replied yes ...
Then he replied "are you doing that to impress me"

Then I just mentioned my friend is booked into same restaurant next week and she's asked me to take a couple of pics of the food

He text "oh so your only meeting me to get pics for your friend"
"I bet you will be making a run for it half way through"

Then asking if I'm wearing a dress for him

Is he just too much?
He's irritating me a bit ..
I haven't really dated In years ..is this normal ?

[Sandra15]

@Bluedelphinium

Fuck him and his tight balls

I chose not to :D

[BlueDahlia69]

@Bluedelphinium

Fuck him and his tight balls

🤣😂

[Embracingthechaos]

@loopyapp

He either owns or has owned a fedora ... Run

[Orla1970]

Trust your gut. A few years ago when I was online dating I had someone similar. Like you by the time the date came I didn’t want to go as I felt he was a bit full on and creepy but he dropped in it was his birthday. I felt sorry for him. Decided I would go. Stay for dinner only. Take the car and then make a fast exit.

For some unknown reason I felt I had to get him a birthday present!!! Eat my dinner and run.

It was the most excruciating couple of hours. He wanted to stroke my hand with his sweaty one. Wanted to feed me! Kept calling me baby girl. It was truly awful. I eventually had to feign illness. Made a fast exit. And then tell him i didn’t want to see him again and block him.

Don’t do it. I met my husband online. There are loads of weird ones out there but in amongst them there are some genuine decent guys. Good luck x

[RulesDontApply2Me]

Where’s OP?
Didn’t she keep the reservation and go with her mate?
Was he hiding in the bushes? 👀

[pictish]

Oh orla - baby girl...omg. Wanting to feed you...eurgghh. I am cringing for you. I wouldn’t have lasted either and might not have been as diplomatic as you, feigning illness. I’d have blurted it out and run.

[uptooearly2]

@Orla1970 I had a similar experience on a birthday date. I will only do drinks first now so I can make a quick exit if need be. If things go well then getting food is an option.

Glad you found the right one!

[Lili132]

You both sound weird. Him for obvious reasons. You because you opened the whole thread about a man while not being able to communicate directly to him what bothered you.

[DrFoxtrot]

I echo PP - you're in your prime OP! There are good men out there, don't lose heart. This man might be very insecure and probably isn't ready to date after his wife leaving. Definitely trust your instincts and give these men a wide berth. It's not your job to bolster his fragile ego.

I once had a potential date ask what I was wearing to work. Obviously suspenders and a stethoscope knobhead.

[Sandra15]

@Lili132

You both sound weird. Him for obvious reasons. You because you opened the whole thread about a man while not being able to communicate directly to him what bothered you.

Oh behave! It's entertaining and enlightening if nothing else. It is a discussion board, isn't it?

[Sandra15]

I went on a couple of dates with a guy I met at work who was 32, I was 34 at the time. He was tall, dark, good looking. Poldark but 6'3" and we used to chat by the pigeonholes when collecting our mail. He sent me chatty emails that were fun and not weird at all. We went to a pizza place for lunch one weekday and that went fairly well, he asked me to meet him for a drink one evening and I met him after I had been to the gym.

He turned up in a long black leather coat looking like Keanu Reeves in the Matrix. He asked where I wanted to go and I suggested a bar, he said he wanted to go elsewhere as it was quieter and we could talk. In there was my friend's boyfriend (now husband) and his friend, who said hello to me whilst the guy was buying drinks. My date (let's call him Karl, for that is his name) asked me if they were bothering me. I said no, I knew them. He told me he was 'half Italian and had a quick temper'.

Later on he wanted to go an Irish bar. In there (it was rammed) he asked me if I normally go out with men (I wasn't sure if he was trying to find out if I was gay, bi or a serial dater or worse), did I like him, did I think he was worth knowing, could he kiss me. It was like being on a date with Adrian Mole.

The last straw was when he said 'I haven't been out with anyone since Nicola chucked me two years ago'. Nicola was 16. When I told him I didn't want to see him anymore, he said - on an email from his work account - that I had 'made him look like a rissole'. I think he meant arsehole.

[LividJabber]

@Sandra15

I went on a couple of dates with a guy I met at work who was 32, I was 34 at the time. He was tall, dark, good looking. Poldark but 6'3" and we used to chat by the pigeonholes when collecting our mail. He sent me chatty emails that were fun and not weird at all. We went to a pizza place for lunch one weekday and that went fairly well, he asked me to meet him for a drink one evening and I met him after I had been to the gym.

He turned up in a long black leather coat looking like Keanu Reeves in the Matrix. He asked where I wanted to go and I suggested a bar, he said he wanted to go elsewhere as it was quieter and we could talk. In there was my friend's boyfriend (now husband) and his friend, who said hello to me whilst the guy was buying drinks. My date (let's call him Karl, for that is his name) asked me if they were bothering me. I said no, I knew them. He told me he was 'half Italian and had a quick temper'.

Later on he wanted to go an Irish bar. In there (it was rammed) he asked me if I normally go out with men (I wasn't sure if he was trying to find out if I was gay, bi or a serial dater or worse), did I like him, did I think he was worth knowing, could he kiss me. It was like being on a date with Adrian Mole.

The last straw was when he said 'I haven't been out with anyone since Nicola chucked me two years ago'. Nicola was 16. When I told him I didn't want to see him anymore, he said - on an email from his work account - that I had 'made him look like a rissole'. I think he meant arsehole.

Rissole. Love it.

Guy I was inadvisedly casually seeing once commented on a photo of my gay friend bear hugging me to call him a “pastard”.

English wasn’t his first language but I sometimes still call friend a “pastard”.

[DrFoxtrot]

@Sandra15

I had 'made him look like a rissole'. I think he meant arsehole.

[MumofPsuedoAdult]

Too much too soon and you haven't even met. I would take note of those red flags and run

[KarmaNoMore]

Oh my... he is not a danger, just a weirdo with no social skills, a stupid view of what dating is about or how to go about it.

This reminded me so much of a very weird woman that I know, zero social skills, but after seeing me so happy with the man I downloaded from the internet she met me because she wanted to give OLD a go and needed some pointers...

Her face when I mentioned that they have to like her too for a meeting to happen, he just thought all men there were there ready to be called in for a date if you wanted one!

Which brings the other abundant weirdos online, those who spend the time asking why people are in the site if nobody want to date

[KarmaNoMore]

Don’t give up OP, 35-40 is a prime dating age. Sadly as it is, many marriages break at this time and there are a lot of nice normal people around who find themselves alone through no significant fault on their own.

My experience of OLD was very positive, met a lot of very nice people, some become long term friends as we had something in common even if there was no spark and yes, I met a couple of men who shared my journey for a good few years. The trick is mot to engage with anyone who gives you a bad vibe, no matter how handsome or perfect they sound on paper (ignore the profiles, they just describe what they hope to be or what they were at particular high points of their life.

And don’t go for drinks or dinner, lower the romanticism expectations by meeting for a coffee so you can run out soon after you met someone you don’t like or... get to meet the ones you like in a more organic old fashioned way.

[Lweji]

FWIW, OP. I started dating my current partner at 47! He is very much a keeper, but had not been snatched up before. I can see why in some ways, but in many ways he is my (almost) perfect partner, as we have a lot in common.

[Sparklfairy]

My date (let's call him Karl, for that is his name)

I'm not sure why, but this made me laugh even more than 'rissole'!

[Lweji]

Oh my... he is not a danger,

I wouldn't be too sure about that.

[BertramLacey]

Oh my... he is not a danger, just a weirdo with no social skills, a stupid view of what dating is about or how to go about it.

You can't know that, and it may be best to assume he could be dangerous.

[deeplyambivalent]

When I told him I didn't want to see him anymore, he said - on an email from his work account - that I had 'made him look like a rissole'. I think he meant arsehole

@Sandra15 you made my day 😂

[WalkingDownTheStreet]

@Sparklfairy

My date (let's call him Karl, for that is his name)

I'm not sure why, but this made me laugh even more than 'rissole'!

PMSL and me too!

[SickOfCrap]

DO NOT GO ON THAT DATE! He's got all the time in the world to show his true colours, but apparently he's creepy and rude AF!
He is showing how superficial he is, demanding you look a certain way. Be very careful, this is not only annoyance. He really sounds controlling and weird!

RUN TO THE HILLS. SERIOUSLY!

[isthismylifenow]

@Sandra15

I went on a couple of dates with a guy I met at work who was 32, I was 34 at the time. He was tall, dark, good looking. Poldark but 6'3" and we used to chat by the pigeonholes when collecting our mail. He sent me chatty emails that were fun and not weird at all. We went to a pizza place for lunch one weekday and that went fairly well, he asked me to meet him for a drink one evening and I met him after I had been to the gym.

He turned up in a long black leather coat looking like Keanu Reeves in the Matrix. He asked where I wanted to go and I suggested a bar, he said he wanted to go elsewhere as it was quieter and we could talk. In there was my friend's boyfriend (now husband) and his friend, who said hello to me whilst the guy was buying drinks. My date (let's call him Karl, for that is his name) asked me if they were bothering me. I said no, I knew them. He told me he was 'half Italian and had a quick temper'.

Later on he wanted to go an Irish bar. In there (it was rammed) he asked me if I normally go out with men (I wasn't sure if he was trying to find out if I was gay, bi or a serial dater or worse), did I like him, did I think he was worth knowing, could he kiss me. It was like being on a date with Adrian Mole.

The last straw was when he said 'I haven't been out with anyone since Nicola chucked me two years ago'. Nicola was 16. When I told him I didn't want to see him anymore, he said - on an email from his work account - that I had 'made him look like a rissole'. I think he meant arsehole.

😂😂

[KarmaNoMore]

You can't know that, and it may be best to assume he could be dangerous.

Oh yes, that’s true you cannot assume anything from someone you don’t know well.

Having said that, that’s true for everyone even if they are not weirdos. Every person who deals with cases of domestic abuse can tell you one thing: Most abusers are charming, that’s how they get away with it.

But this one is not even charming so there is no point in even risking it!