"When I'm in a relationship, I wouldn't go out without my partner, it's not fair on them".

[MarshmallowAra]

"When I'm in a relationship, I wouldn't go out without my partner, it's not fair on them".

What would you think.of a man who made that statement?

At least one of weird, controlling and abusive.

Bonkers

Weirdo not attractive behaviour sounds controlling

I'd worry that what he really means is 'I don't expect my partner to every go out without me and will try to make them feel unreasonable of they want to have a drink with a friend'

I wouldn’t know what fairness has to do with it

His family Inc in-laws are the same apparently (though one goes on fishing trips and I'd be amazed if he's never gone into one pub/bar- restaurant etc. while away).

Does anyone actually think like this? it sound like someone who has no boundaries, no independence and not very emotionally healthy at all.

Control freak or sad sack.

Weird and not healthy.

It's his partners words not his own,
or/as well as,
he wouldn't want any partner to be going out without him

It means “I don’t want my partner to go out and have fun without me, and I particularly don’t want her to have male friends.”

Incredibly controlling.

How bizarre. I go on holiday once or twice a year without dh and leave him home with the dc. It's lovely to go out on your own - shows, pubs, nice restaurants. I mean I wouldn't go out clubbing without him, but I wouldn't go out clubbing with him either because I'm old. It sounds controlling and boring to me.

@Iheartbed

I wouldn’t know what fairness has to do with it

Apparently night time social situations with alcohol involved and people on the pull are an unfair thing to "subject" your partner to l, and presumably unwise to put yourself in).

Bonkers. In a healthy relationship you respect your partner enough know they can manage themselves, even with horrors alcohol and members of the opposite sex.

I’d run! I’d be worried that would mean I’d be expected to do the same.

He's controlling. What he really means is he doesn't want his partner to go out.
Not a chance I'd hang around for that crazy.

We don’t go out without each other, but we rarely go out with each other either. We’re very much home people. Not saying either of us wouldn’t though so not the same really

I hope you're showing him these replies, OP. Its not ok at all to suggest someone is being unfair by going out with friends, or going out by themselves even.

He is unilaterally setting up the rules of any relationship.
He is untrusting and will cause loads of arguments based on the fact that his dp glanced at another man.
He will accuse his partner of cheating when they did no such thing.
He will be possessive with no confidence and self esteem and will look at his partner as his object.

It sounds like the kind of thing someone says then when they cheat they can turn around and blame you for letting them out alone.

That's mad.
Would never think like that.

Generally i’d think of someone who said that that it’s controlling.

If it were someone i was thinking of dating i’d be thinking how quickly can I hit the block button! No patience for this sort of thing at all.

So he's saying that he thinks so little of his partner that he can't trust himself to go out without her in case he shags someone else?

I'd avoid him like the plague

What about evening social situations such as going for a meal, to the theatre or cinema? Hardly 'on the pull situations'. Anyway even if it was pubs and clubs, nobody has the right to prevent you going out, it's controlling and unhealthy.

So he wouldn't put himself in the way of temptation, is that what he's saying?