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Relationships

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What age did you meet the love of your life?

242 replies

Herewegoagain22 · 11/04/2021 13:34

I’m 33, had three long term relationships, but never been married or had kids. I would love nothing more than to settle down and find my ‘person’. I’m just out of a relationship where I got very hurt, and I’m taking a lot of time to focus on me and be on my own. But at 33, everyone around me is settling down, buying houses (I already own my own), getting engaged, marrying, announcing pregnancies. I just don’t think it will ever happen for me. I would be lying if I said seeing all this whilst I feel so shit isn’t making me envious, because it is.

What age did you all meet your ‘person’ and settle down? I know I’m only 33 but with everything I’ve gone through in my life I feel about 50.

OP posts:
LemonRoses · 11/04/2021 20:48

Eighteen but we weren’t a couple for several years.

Dery · 11/04/2021 20:50

I think “love of your life” is a dangerous concept in a way. We can deeply love numerous partners and numerous partners can be right for us. If each of us only had one other right person on the entire planet then very few people would settle down. I would say my DH is the love of my life but if timings had been different and I had settled down with another man then that other man would probably be the love of my life.

All that said, I would say my mum met the love of her life at 55. She had an extremely happy second marriage.

Ninkanink · 11/04/2021 21:00

Oh I don’t believe in ‘the one’ by any means. Of course there are countless men who could have been the love of my life.

However DH is the love of my life, because I’ve chosen him, and because he truly is a great man.

Msgiggles30 · 11/04/2021 21:16

I am 33 and still waiting! Been single most of my life. I'm not actually too worried about the meeting someone part as even at 40s we'd hopefully have another 40odd years together so no huge rush there. However its the baby thing making me worry as obviously there is a clock on that one! I'm not looking either so don't really help my own situation Grin but maybe next year when things should be a bit more normal.

Pyewackect · 11/04/2021 21:21
  1. We met at university. Married 3 years later had our first child 9 months after that. Still happily married at 43.
OMGISeeTheWayYouShine · 11/04/2021 21:30

35

MsAnnFrope · 11/04/2021 21:32

I don’t believe in “the one” I think there are probably many possible ones.
But I would describe DH as the great overwhelming love of my life so far. Met at 28, got together at 31 (we are a bit slow) and have been together 10 years.
He is just bloody lovely and I’ve loved him deeply from (probably before) when we got together!

Changingwiththetimes · 11/04/2021 21:36
  1. He died 8 years later.
tisonlymeagain · 11/04/2021 21:57

If people want to believe in "the one" then let them. If you don't, fair enough but what's the point in even opening this thread.

Ninkanink · 11/04/2021 22:10

It’s an important thing to address - if you think there’s one ‘the one’ in life then you might well feel hopeless if at one point it looks like you might never meet them. If you’re realistic, that there’s not one specific person you’re supposed to meet but, in fact, there are multiple opportunities for finding a love of your life, that’s actually a much more hopeful and positive stance.

ravenmum · 11/04/2021 22:23

@MrsPsmalls

'The love of your life' What absolute bollocks. There is no love of anyone's life. Do you think its written in the stars?? The 'one' is nonsense. Come on people, why do we try to sell each other this romantic claptrap. You meet someone. You get on with them. They like you back or they don't. You make a good choice or you don't. Life goes on. We are not special. Our partners are not special. Our lovelives are not special.
I don't actually see anyone on this thread talking about "the one" as if there was only one possible partner for them on the planet. The discussion is a bit more nuanced than you've assumed.

Life would be dull if the people in our lives meant so little to us that we felt they could be replaced with any other random person. I hope you do have someone who's special to you, one day if not now.

Megan2018 · 11/04/2021 22:28

A few weeks shy of 35.
First and only OLD! Moved in together after 6 weeks, engaged after 4 months, married a year later. Very quick but matters less when you are old and financially independent. No previous kids for either of us.
Been together 8 years now, 7th wedding anniversary this year. DD is 19 months, we were 41 and 46 when she was born.

TakeMeToKernow · 11/04/2021 22:30

My good friends were both 33.

My OH was 42 when he met me Wink

cheesebubble · 11/04/2021 22:38

20, at uni. He sat next to me in class and turned out to be my neighbour.

Candyfloss99 · 11/04/2021 22:39

36

SheeshazAZ09 · 11/04/2021 22:43

I was 58 and had given up on ever meeting anyone ever again. We’ve been together for a few years now and are both grateful that we found each other. Yes there are compromises on both sides but we are so much better together than on our own.

ghostmouse · 11/04/2021 22:44

41 and it hit me like a sledgehammer

BonesJones · 11/04/2021 22:44
  1. After swearing off men for life too. I have no idea how or why he was single either. Almost 4 years in and I can't fault him! He's a gem!
Ruminating2020 · 11/04/2021 22:44
  1. Married 2 years later and celebrating our 20th anniversary this year.
nettytree · 11/04/2021 22:46

18... But didn't fancy him. Then at 29 we got together, now married for 18 years.

ghostmouse · 11/04/2021 22:48

MrsPsmalls

'The love of your life' What absolute bollocks. There is no love of anyone's life. Do you think its written in the stars?? The 'one' is nonsense. Come on people, why do we try to sell each other this romantic claptrap. You meet someone. You get on with them. They like you back or they don't. You make a good choice or you don't. Life goes on. We are not special. Our partners are not special. Our lovelives are not special'

Actually after spending most of my life with 2 dickheads who I loved very much but turned out to be monumental tossers and now I'm with someone who makes me feel special in a way I never have before. Hes the same. We've been through so much shit in our lives and we work very well together. Hes pretty special to me! A good soul.

johnstownflood · 11/04/2021 22:49

17 - married 41 years

Namaste6 · 11/04/2021 22:50
  1. Now 53 and he's still the love of my life.
shipsandgiggles · 11/04/2021 22:52

15 when we got together, I met him at 11 though.

TheDogsMother · 11/04/2021 22:54

I met him after the end of my 15 year marriage when I was 43. I knew he was a lovely person and the love grew but I'm not sure if this describes the definition of 'the one'. We lived separately for 7 years then bought a house together 6 years ago and got married 6 months ago. He's definitely the love of my life.