'Perhaps we could carry on as we are, with me treating you as an option, and you - now you've been told I see you as some kind of appliance; like, say, a washing-machine - continuing to make yourself available when I need you, getting very, very little in return.'
So, so cheeky. Or maybe lacking in full comprehension of the fact that other people - particularly you - are real, full human beings - with wants and needs at least as powerful and important as his.
I think you've learned that you did a lot of work in this relationship. Not least, you projected onto him lots of your own inner, emotional life. For example, a warmth, and a willingness to love another person, that was present in abundance in you - but not him.
You also didn't pay enough attention to what you needed and wanted. You didn't acknowledge what your wants and needs were/are, and you didn't insist to yourself that those wants and needs be met.
Not initially, anyway. After five years of basically starving yourself, you did.
Which is good - at least you did it in the end.
Well done.
The trick now is to learn to identify, acknowledge and insist on those needs far sooner. Not five years next time!
You've learnt a bit about yourself - and that's a good thing.
You've learned that you are capable of warmth and a real generosity towards the people you form intimate relationships with. Which is great. What a wonderful trait to have.
You've also learnt that you are inclined to be a little blind to your own needs, a little too dismissive of them. That you want intimate relationships that are more centred on you, where you do less of the work, where a partner is around when you need them.
That's good, too.
You must accept that this is what you want - don't let some inner voice dismiss that as you being 'needy' or 'selfish'. It's what you want - and you now know that you will end any relationship that doesn't give you that. So tell that inner voice to keep quiet, because it's wasting your time.
Onwards to that next relationship.
And remember, that quality of generosity is very precious. Don't waste it on people who interpret it as you being a pushover, or someone who is willing to exploit that generosity to put themselves first.
Look for someone who also has that same generosity - and who demonstrates it, with actions - someone who really understands the value of that generosity.
That will be the foundations of a really great relationship.
It may all be a bit grim at the moment but this is part of life. It's full of these learning experiences. The best - absolute best - we can do is learn from them, and take them as an opportunity to change and grow.
You clearly have the capacity to do that in spades - which is great.
So, onwards and upwards!