Don’t mention the jasmine!

[StuckInPollyannaMode]

Can’t believe I’m onto my third thread.

Previous one here

Been packing the car to go to the tip. It’s rammed! Cat has been out for the first time and thankfully returned.

Greatly enjoyed my walks this weekend. Got an 8 miler in yesterday but the best part was coming back, lighting the fire and getting into a hot bath. Had a zoom with friends last night, touch too much red wine, but it was so much fun.

You’re all right re the petition. It doesn’t matter, he’s just jackbooting. Someone asked what I’d put in, sorry but I’m not comfortable sharing that at present, been advised to keep it to myself whilst it’s ongoing.

Geller is, however, incredulous that I’m not willing to carry on sharing Amazon Prime and Music Unlimited.

The weighted blankets have arrived so I’m just about to go sort out the laundry and the girls run. Been enjoying Radio 2’s musical weekend, but I can’t understand how Steve Wright is still on.

Tip run, then they come back. Roast chicken with bread sauce and roast gnocchi and board games this afternoon in front of the fire I think. Sounds like he’s been running them ragged, lots of walks etc which is good as means I don’t need to!

How’s everyone else spending their Sunday?

Please tell me you told him to just fuck off, regarding the wardrobe doors, haircut, etc!

We’re going for a bike ride this morning and they want me to get back into my running whilst they cycle. Erm...it’s going to hurt.

In my head this is the Rocky training montage. Do you think you could get them to cycle behind you singing Eye of the Tiger? Just a thought...

@StuckInPollyannaMode

If the girls are with you - and therefore safe - could you not block/mute him? That way you wouldn't see when he's making these idiotic "requests".

If he did want to speak/FaceTime them when they are with you - and you're OK with that - you could just set them up for a time and duration which works for you! You would not be part of the conversation - just the facilitator. 🌹

What the actual feck!

He’s asked you, YOU to put on his wardrobe doors and cut his hair. What did his last slave or minion die of?

I hope you told him to ODFOD and also are noting all this with your SHL.

I had to suppress a small chuckle at Geller asking you for a haircut...

My STBEX did that, but as I was setting up my ‘cutting station ‘ in the kitchen, he came in to yell at me for something I’d supposedly done. Or not done. Can’t remember... all a blur. Made me 😡😡😡

Then when he sat down and I switched on the clippers, I can’t begin to tell you what was going through my mind.

Some very bad thoughts indeed.

He will have to wait for the wardrobe doors won't he, you are not going in his house, you are not his odd job woman, he will have to ask someone who likes him else. Oh hang on, he hasn't got any friends, Funny that
You could send a msg to your friends.
"Heads up, The village Idiot is sniffing about for another favour"...I have not suggested anyone be his unpaid hairdresser/furniture remover/secretary/odd job person."

Time to ask a friend if you can make a support bubble with them which as a single parent you are entitled to do.

Regardless just say "no", you are not his skivvy.

How incompetent is this man? A bit of basic DIY is beyond him? Really?

Definitely give our friends the heads up that you have not volunteered them for anything. Good luck with the aches and pains!

He is appalling at DIY. Can barely use a screwdriver. Zero spatial awareness. He’s also a really bad driver. My lovely car won’t be driven properly 😟

He makes a mean gin and tonic though.

I put on eye of the tiger whilst running and they thought it was hilarious! Going to do it again Thursday and Friday. But I only did 1 run from week 3 of C25k today, easing myself back in, so upping the ante to week 5 or 6 on Thursday...find it so much easier with someone telling me what to do. Metaphor for my life really.

Pancakes for lunch. Well, why not?

Yes to pancakes.

No to skipping weeks of C25K. Little and often is the trick to be becoming a runner. As with so many things in life .

I’ve just done yoga and bike ride with the DC in readiness for pancakes for dinner. Bring on the Nutella!

pancake cheers

We had pancakes for lunch here. I let my 6 year old DD do the mixing and the amount of air she put in actually made the best pancake batter ive had in years.

mine are totally unaware that its pancake day, despite the advanced ages of 14 and 20. I will surprise them later

At drop off, he asked if I could cut his hair next weekend?!

I’ve got some fine clippers, you might not be able to fit in “Fuckwit” unless he’s got a particularly wide head but I dare say you could shave in “Cunt”.

And I hear you on the whole “I know we’ve split up but will you still sort my life out for me like you used to?” thing. My ex did that and he was quite surprised when I said no, I wouldn’t organise his new housemate’s birthday party for him. Nor would I take things to the tip for him, or be responsible for furniture he’d bought from me in the split but that no longer served his purpose. I wanted to shove the office chair in question up his arse, five-wheeled base first.

Practice phrases to use on the phone, to be trotted out before hanging up.

He says .... can you do X for me?
You say ... no, not my problem. End call.

He says ... the girls are terrible etc et
You say .... you’re their father, it’s their day with you, you sort it. Hang up.

He says .... I am calling the school about their terrible behaviour, this can’t go on..
You say .... Right oh. And hang up.

Better still if you don’t answer his calls.
And definitely ignore any texts.

You should have a list written out next to the phone - he has you so well-trained that you can't help but try and "nice him out". Time to shut him down. You have to not be his go-to girl anymore.

Just woken up from the most horrendous nightmare that I’d taken the girls on a day trip to a theme park with my family and we forgot to put them in the car when leaving and I didn’t realise until I was nearly home, and of course couldn’t get hold of anyone as the park had closed and then got stuck in a traffic jam.

Phew.

On top of all this, the cat has a dicky tum and keeps missing her litter tray.

Don’t worry @C0RAL I used to run 4 times a week, have just missed a couple of months few weeks so need 4 or 5 training runs to ease myself back into it. Wore my new waterproof socks and they worked a treat! Pleasantly achy this morning.

You’re all right. I need to work on reframing my thinking around being a pleaser.I do the same with my mother as well, I’ve read the Stately Homes threads several times over the years.

Just sold my first item on Vinted! Thanks for the heads up on that, lovely posters who encouraged me. Question - when people favourite your items, should I be messaging them? I don’t find the app the easiest to use I must say, there’s no selling section. But if it shifts it all, it’s worth it.

Time for a cuppa. Have a good Wednesday everyone.

You definitely have been conditioned to be nice and accommodating to others at any cost to yourself. You need to be blunt and abrupt with him. You need to reclaim your space from him which means no more ridiculous messages or requests- he is imposing himself in your brain space and down time.

He believes he is entitled to have your help, time and attention- he isn't!!! The sooner you deal with it and reclaim your time for yourself the better you will cope.

You need to make "STOP!" your magic power word with this twat. Just one short, sharp syllable. Like you're training a dog. Derail all and any of his shit with that. (Imagine you're smacking him on the nose with a newspaper at the same time.)

*Not that I advocate smacking dogs. I love them. I'd smack him any day, though. He's awful.

Re Vinted, no I wouldn't respond to "favourites" , unless to say, make me an offer.
My chum says its best to accept offers promptly though, as she thinks it goes down in the listing if you wait. It depends if the price is right obvs.
I put an office chair on my local fb Marketplace yesterday, had an offer in 30 mins.(had already rung around & offered it to various people in the interim, so had already given it away! Sods law !!)

Oh I hate realistic dreams like that hope you have a better night tonight

Think of the bad dream as your brain having a bit of a clearout. Some unpleasant rubbish has been cleared away, and you will feel lighter for it, especially if you can "break the dream" by reasserting what rubbish it was. It sounds daft, but if you say it out loud, even if you're on your own, naming it can clear your mind. "Whew, what a nasty dream! Glad it's rubbish!" Bonus if you can do something pleasant, like giving the girls a cuddle, just because.
I have been known to crash the living daylights out of the piano to lift my spirits, but each to their own.

Bad dreams lose their power if you tell someone about them 💐

Just back from a run in the rain. Did 2 x 8 minutes and 1 x 4 minutes, not too shabby!

I’d hung my washing out before we left. Needless to say the heavens opened and it was wetter when we returned than when I took it out the machine.

But the bitter edge has gone from the wind, snowdrops are out, daffodils won’t be far off. I’ve now sold 3 items on Vinted and finally managed to put all the laundry away. Spring isn’t far off, my friends! And Geller is being served with divorce papers tomorrow.

Needless to say I’m revisiting the no sugar thing. Frankly right now I’ve enough going on. Plus I really want a gin tonight. But I do need to address my weight at some point.