Tell me this is for the best

[Paris100]

After Separation then divorce, I started seeing someone new, long distance, and it all seemed to be going well. Lockdown was difficult but we formed an extended household for support after making sure this was allowed. We would travel to see each other when we could.
We agreed that he would come to me for Christmas, again making sure this was allowed with regulations for extended household in Scotland.
He phoned earlier today and said I was a bit off. I explained I’d been busy prepping in the kitchen etc. I was also tired from running around in the lead up to Christmas. He then sent a text dumping me. Dumped by text from a 56 year old on Christmas Eve.
Please tell me that I’ve had a lucky escape.

You've had a very lucky escape. Use Christmas day to get over him - I think you'll be fine.

What an absolute arsehole!! I’m so sorry.. Yes, you absolutely deserve better x

Lucky escape by the sounds of it! Sorry though, being dumped sucks, especially at Christmas but you're better off without him.

And now 2021 will be a better year for you in more than just covid ways.... What a twat.

I’ve also spent a flippin fortune on food

Making an excuse you were 'off'......dumping you at the last minute.....long distance relationship......he's probably with someone else closer to home and had an invite for Christmas there.

Onwards and upwards OP!

That is really poor behaviour from him. I think you know this and it won't take you long to move on. Better things ahead.

At least you get to keep the food.

It does make me think, though, that this man had other plans. I can't imagine he's going to spend it alone with a fish finger sandwich.

Have you ever been to his? My first thought was he's married.

I suppose (and after a few glasses of wine) I’ve seen it coming over recent months.
He’s tried to dump me a few times (by blocking and deleting) over petty things.
He told me his mum, who I’ve never met, has referred to me as a witch
His sexual preferences weren’t always in line with mine.
He’s had no contact with his own children, now grown up, for years.

@DobbleQueen

Have you ever been to his? My first thought was he's married.

Yes I’ve been there several times. Met friends and neighbours etc.

@Paris100

I suppose (and after a few glasses of wine) I’ve seen it coming over recent months. He’s tried to dump me a few times (by blocking and deleting) over petty things. He told me his mum, who I’ve never met, has referred to me as a witch His sexual preferences weren’t always in line with mine. He’s had no contact with his own children, now grown up, for years.

Dodged a bullet, OP, although I'm sorry it's made you sad at Christmas. Onwards and upwards, you deserve better!

Fucking hell, after that update, you should have dumped him ages ago. Use this time to reflect upon why your standards have been so low and move on from this.

Oooh tell us about his sexual preferences! And you've dodged a bullet with that MIL - lucky escape!

Oh that’s awful. It sounds like he was looking for an excuse to cancel or he didn’t really want to come to yours anyway.

Totally a lucky escape OP. I have a similar tale - first relationship after breakdown of a 10year relationship - he dumped me by text on my birthday.

Honestly it was for the best. In retrospect, he was a totally unsuitable rebound relationship. He also had more red flags than a communist convention. It was the kick up the arse I needed to stop letting men treat me badly and develop healthy boundaries. I met DH not long after and I truly believe our relationship wouldn't be as good as it is if I hadn't been given

Sorry posted too soon - if I hadn't been given the wake up call that I obviously had to work on myself a bit more.

@curiouslypacific

Totally a lucky escape OP. I have a similar tale - first relationship after breakdown of a 10year relationship - he dumped me by text on my birthday.

Honestly it was for the best. In retrospect, he was a totally unsuitable rebound relationship. He also had more red flags than a communist convention. It was the kick up the arse I needed to stop letting men treat me badly and develop healthy boundaries. I met DH not long after and I truly believe our relationship wouldn't be as good as it is if I hadn't been given

Funnily enough it was my birthday yesterday. His present to me and I don’t want to sound ungrateful was a book from eBay on DIY

I'm sorry he was so horribly callous to you, but it seems like it's not much of a surprise, after your second post.

Good riddance, and onwards and upwards for you into 2021.

Wow ....you've dodged a whole rifle full of bullets.

Congratulations

@HollowTalk

Oooh tell us about his sexual preferences! And you've dodged a bullet with that MIL - lucky escape!

Porn and ‘if I really loved him I’d give him a threesome’. Like hell!

Hi op , you are not alone . I have blocked after we planned to see each other on Boxing Day . No explanation yesterday he was excited to see me on Saturday, and today I am blocked . I hope it does get better hugs to you

@lovellost

Hi op , you are not alone . I have blocked after we planned to see each other on Boxing Day . No explanation yesterday he was excited to see me on Saturday, and today I am blocked . I hope it does get better hugs to you

Oh I hope you are ok x

Happy birthday. Him going his own way is the best present you could have!

I’m not wondering why his ex dumped his ass. It’s fairly obvious. He and his mother are not nice people. You deserve better.

You have a great Christmas watching tv of your choice and stuffing your face and not having to wonder if some idiot man is going to ask you to do sex stuff you’re not into or make you watch some crap tv progs you don’t like. See, things are looking up

Freeze anything you won’t manage to eat and defrost next week or for new year. Save you hassle then.

Youve well dodged a bullet. Phew.

I am hurt because I don't know what I have done . It's just so out of the blue . I will be fine I think . No other alternative is there