Would you date/marry a man without higher education?

[bunny85]

Just that really. If everything else was great, would it be a deal breaker for you? Let's say a man who only finished high school- no college, no uni. Would you?

@littleloopylou pre covid (and hopeful post Covid) you could meet somebody at the gym, a bar, the park etc and wouldn’t know their highest level of education though.
I know what you mean in terms of your immediate social circle but it doesn’t completely rule out others.

If I loved him and he loved me, of course I would! Love is the foundation of marriage, not an education or degree!!

Seriously OP? Give your educated head a wobble

Your question Op has sparked a though in my brain.
I went to uni but my husband didn’t we both have very good jobs with high wages for the NW.
We have a lot of friends but we all live in semi rural areas, not 30 miles to the nearest city but very small towns and villages.
I’ve always had a slight disconnect with some people and I think after your question it’s not lack f education but lack of experience. None of them would ever say anything racist but they don’t know or have never had friends that aren’t WASP, I’m finally realising why as much as I am friends it’s very superficial.

@bunny85

Just that really. If everything else was great, would it be a deal breaker for you? Let's say a man who only finished high school- no college, no uni. Would you?

Yes, it would be a deal breaker for me. I'd tell him to run a fucking mile from you. My husband left school with zero qualifications. No college and no Uni, He sold his company 5 years ago for £ 35 million.

(looks across sofa) He seems to have shaped up OK.
One of his favourite sayings is "I thought you were supposed to be intelligent" as he does life much better than me in many ways. We are not fussed about earnings, many couples have different salaries.

Sorry I went off on a tangent. I think experience is more important than education. As long as you are equal that’s all that matters.

Grow up.

You are being absolutely ridiculous.

Degrees are overrated. Most students go to university because it’s expected of them. They doss through the first couple of years and then leave with a 2/2 or a 3rd and still want the respect of having obtained a degree.

A generation ago degrees were for the elite and the super bright. Now anyone can get one in any pointless subject.

But I suspect that if you’re shallow enough to consider a lack of higher education a deal breaker then you probably are just shallow anyway and no man would ever meet your exacting standards.

Yes I did, now my husband has a better degree then mine.

Your post is a little disingenuous Tbf op... and your friend is an idiot. There is no ‘most women’ this is used to prove they’re in the right. Ask her for the stats. Bet it’s the daily fail. Marriage is a meeting of minds IMO... not education

Yes, I have a post grad (although only got that this year) and DH doesnt have any academic qualifications. He knows a lot more than me about current affairs, maths etc. School just wasnt for him at the time though he is dipping his toes back in to education now and really enjoying it.

My Dh has a degree. A lot more intelligent than me. For five years he earned triple what I did. I am smart in different ways, I started my own business 3 years ago and I earn enough that he could quit his job if he wanted to. Being academic does not = better. Ambition and drive goes a long way!
Anyone so small minded that would let it annoy them are snobs 😐

What a bizarre post.

Yes. I married him. I’m educated to degree level, he’s much more intelligent than me. He was written off at school due to undiagnosed (I suspect) dyslexia

Exactly the same as dp (not married)

He's qualified as a welder and has worked hard since he was 16..50 now.

People without a formal education arent some kind of sub species!

Read your update

To add - you’re friend is an absolute clown!

Yes, and I do live with one. Barely two GCSEs to rub together (didnt' get on with school, has found his place in the world later in life) , but bright as a button and intellectually curious. And helpfully way more practical than I am....it would depend on the person though.

If I felt like I could still talk to him then yes I would.

'Degrees are overrated. Most students go to university because it’s expected of them. They doss through the first couple of years and then leave with a 2/2 or a 3rd and still want the respect of having obtained a degree.'

I left with a 2:2 but I didnt doss, I struggled massively with undiagnosed adhd and poor mental health and a high parental expectation. Uni wasn't the right place for me but I'm still proud I got a degree.

Sorry if that makes me thick

WTF?! Honestly??

Who the feck would throw away someone they love & could see a future with cus they haven't spent 3 years living in virtual slums eating packet noodles, getting pissed and studying something that, let's face it, the vast majority of us never even use afterwards??!!

Long & successful relationships are based on love, respect, companionship and compromise, not a 2.2 in Geography

Of course, some men (I'll call them men loosely) are intimidated by women who are better educated than they and make it their aim to diminish them, these should be avoided like the plague but if you're talking about a decent bloke then OF COURSE it's not important!!

I would like to say yes but it would probably be no because I was brought up in a family that put a big emphasis on education so it would be hard to shake that off.

Honestly? No. It would indicate too wide a disparity between our backgrounds and the value we place on education and would suggest we'd have very little in common (in fact, since I left school I've met very few people who don't have degrees, we just don't mix in the same circles). That's not to say someone who doesn't have a degree can't be intelligent and a valuable member of society. And there are many people with degrees I'd not date either.

I never went to uni, does that mean I am not good marriage material? Or is it only men you are taking about? (together 30 years. married 18 and haven't run out of conversation yet)

Yes, I married man with no higher education. He is a kind, honest, funny, intelligent man who earns 3 times the amount I did (before I gave up work to be a sahm, now he supports our whole family!)

I married on with a degree, he's still not driven though? I'd rather swop for less educated more ambition!!