Partner not contributing enough

[yourstruley]

My partner thinks I'm being completely unreasonable. So I could do with some advice.

My partner works full time and earns about 1600 a month.
I'm on UC and do not work, I've recently given birth to my 2nd DD.
We have been separated for quite a while and decided to give things another go.
My issue is he sends me 500 a month to help towards the house bills and the kids.
He says that the kids are already being supported via UC so they're set.
The bills come out of my account and I use my benefits to pay off the utilities etc.
Which totals up to 350.
Sometimes more due to being in debt.
However my issue is from his salary he only contributes 500 out of the month.

Am I being unreasonable?

Do you live together? If so you should be pooling your benefits and his income and paying the rent and bills jointly. If you don’t then £500 a month from a £1,600 income sounds pretty generous child maintenance, considering that’s he’s correct that your benefits will be paying your bills.

We didn't live together for a long time, we've just got back together.
500 isn't bad for child maintenance, I would be too fussed if I was receiving
That.
I still haven't updated UC, I'm guessing they'll start form next month.
But he's refusing to contribute towards the utilities, council tax etc if he pays towards the rent.
He's saying he cannot contribute more than 600 towards the whole house and the kids

I think you need to sit down with him and go over finances now you are living together again. £500 a month from his wage seems a good amount of child maintenance.
How much UC will you lose with him living with you?

So you didn’t live together but now you do? I’m not clear how he doesn’t contribute? He pays the rent and sends you £500 to pay the bills which you say total up to £350; you’ve also been receiving UC, which pays for everything else. What else do you need him to contribute to, it he’s paying the rent and bills and you also have benefit money? Yes, it would be much more clear cut if, once your joint UC claim is sorted, you pay rent and bills out of the total household income of UC and wages and then split the rest equally.

Or you don’t live together? In which case he’s sending you almost a third of his salary as child maintenance and has to pay his own rent and bills and living expenses out of about £1,000 a month.

Yes, the £500 isn't towards the kids only.
It's for the kids and the bills.

Do you live together or not?

Do you live together? Are both the dc his?

If he moves in with you, he's going to have to give you most of his earnings surely. What does he have to pay for out of the £1000 he intends keeping?

Does he live in the property with you?

Are you a couple? (Whether that's living together or apart)

Yes we live together now Sorry maybe I wasn't clear enough, he doesn't pay towards the rent or anything.
He only sends me 500 which he started after DD was born.

Does your tenancy and your benefits claim show that he lives with you?

No he has only moved in a few days ago.

Then he can't refuse to pay towards the bills. Well he technically can, but they have to paid. Your UC will go down now he is living with you so he's going to have to step up and pay his share. Which, as the only earner, might have to be more than 50%

Ok, well I think it's important to establish what you will be entitled to now that he lives with you so I'd suggest plugging the new info into Entitled to.org

Then you can have a clear figure of what his income plus any benefit income will total.

Then, the two of you need to sit and write a list of outgoings and split this accordingly.

If you live together then you need to think of all the money that comes into the household whether it’s what he earns or what you get in benefits, and then that money pays for everything you both and the DC need.

If he’s not willing to do this then don’t move back in with him or let him move in with you. He isn’t a partner if he doesn’t want a partnership.

Is he father to both of your children?

You are both lining yourself up for a tin of trouble.

He cannot move in until you have told UC. You risk benefits fraud allegations.

Secondly you need to run all your new circumstances into a benefits calculator. Then you need to take off rent, bills and food and decide how you share out the remainder.

The way he is working it out is completely back to front

Sorry after you've done the benefits calculator you need to add his total income, then take off the bills

@Hazelnutlatteplease

This totally

I have no idea re benefits. But for your partner to be paying just 1/3 of his pay towards the cost of living is outrageous. Unless he lived sponged with with parents before moving back in with you, he must be saving a bloody fortune by only paying £500 towards rent and other living costs. Even without the kids this would be outrageous.

Go back to living alone. he is clearly a CF.

If you'll be financially worse off living with him, what will you do OP?

Hard to say as your UC will go down. £500 which pays all the bills and an additional £150 on top seems ok. How much is the rent? Does your UC pay all of it? Will it continue to when he's added to the tenancy?

Me and DP pool resources and everything gets paid from there. His money and my money are our money. It's how we've always worked it. There are never any arguments. We both pull our weight, it's just that one of us (currently him, but me in the past) is more financially rewarded for that.

It's much easier to do it that way, because if you have annoyances or concerns about finances, they never get any easier.

Are they his children?

At £1600/month after deductions you probably won’t be eligible for much UC (if at all). If he’s not willing to fully support the family he’ll have to move back out.

And, if he’s not willing to support his family, do yourself and your kids a favour and get rid of him (dump, don’t kill).