Ex-husband wants to steal my house

[Al7722]

So I was married o my ex-husband for less than years, we have two daughters who live with me. Before we got married I inherited a house which I sold whilst we were married and bought one in the UK. It was always understood that it would go to the kids. My ex-husband is lazy, useless at home and let me do a full time job with a 3 hr daily commutte and all the chores whilst he sat on the couch with the kids watching TV. I finally had enough and asked for a divorce. Now he wants me to sell MY house and give him half the money eventhough he hasn't contributed a penny or carried out any handy work whatsoever in it. He doesn't care that the kids would lose their house.

My question is: has someone had a similar experience? What was the outcome? and also does anyone know a sharky lawyer who could defend me better than my current one?

Thank you so much!

Yip, if you are married assets usually divided 50/50. Shortness of marriage may mitigate. Speak to a lawyer.

Surely if you can prove you inherited before the marriage and it’s the kids family home then you can’t be forced to sell? I thought kids best interest trumped everything else? Email half a dozen local divorce solicitors. Book appointments. Get advice. Shop around and find a good one who knows their stuff about inheritance and assets

When I was looking at divorce, the solicitor told me that they wouldn’t force the kids out of their family home

Thats the delights of marriage. Works both ways. He can force a sale if marriage is over and assets and property have to be divided up. 50/50 to start but the courts do look at length of marriage too. If he isn't working and you are he could also go for spousal maintenance I believe too.

It’s a marital asset. And while he may not be able to force you to sell it, he will likely be entitled to a portion of its value, but that will depend on e.g the length of the marriage etc.

My cousin’s wife left him after three months and she was entitled to half the equity in his house...

You need to see a lawyer.

Shame you didn’t realise how useless he was before marrying him.

Are you in the UK ? How many years married ? His children ?

I think if half the house isn’t enough to buy another house for the children to live in then you can get it declared by the courts that the house isn’t to be sold until the youngest child leaves home?

How many years married, OP? Its missing from the post. Also, did you cohabit continuously before marriage?

You forgot to add in the number of years married op after you typed out that story.

You may have to re mortgage to keep the house to give DH what ever % he is legally entitled to. I know someone who has done that and now has huge mortgage plus other payments to ex spouse because they never earned much as an artist(the ex spouse I mean!).

Agree with PPs.
You need a good solicitor.

we have been married less than 5 years, yes the kids are his, yes I am in the UK

The house is only a three bedroom and there are 4 of us so we can't afford to go smaller. Also my daughter is autistic and needs special care so she needs to be near the current school

It's not as simple as 50/50. A court is going to look at length of marriage, contribution to finances, home for the children etc. If he didn't help buy it, hasn't been paying into mortgage, or working, or being primary carer, its incredibly unlikely he'll get 50%.

@AnneLovesGilbert - Yes the biggest mistake of my life and I will regret it for ever!

@Muchadoaboutlife - what happened in the end? did you go through with it?

Surely though the court will take into account that he looked after the children? I know the OP says he is useless but if she works f/t then he must have had the children when they were pre schoolers.

OP how long were you together before getting married?

My solicitor told me that if you’ve been married under 5 yrs the courts try to unwind finances so you both effectively come out if it with what you put in. This was thankfully my experience. We were married 3 yrs, he had an affair & left. I was the main owner.

Furthermore the court will look at the children having a roof over their heads as a priority.

Is this property in your name or joint names/tenants in common?

You don’t know how bad it is until you pay for legal advice.

Ach its so hard! My ex still refuses to work (when we got together it seemed like he was running a business, he made the right noises about growth, i funded it, it was only after time and a child i realised it was actually a glorified hobby and he had no intention of growing it, working harder, sharing it or getting a job, or doing any housecare or maintenance!) - luckily because he bled me dry over the years and left me penniless and in debt there are no assets to come after, but i did wonder, in court how would i PROVE he was refusing to work or help in the house? It would he my word against his that we hadnt agreed he was a stay at home dad!

@Derelictwreck

It's not as simple as 50/50. A court is going to look at length of marriage, contribution to finances, home for the children etc. If he didn't help buy it, hasn't been paying into mortgage, or working, or being primary carer, its incredibly unlikely he'll get 50%.

It sounds as if he was the primary carer, though?

@notapizzaeater - we were married for 5 years roughly.

Loads to factor in... is the house in both your names? Do you have evidence that he is a feckless useless bar steward, in that he contributes nothing financially?

Unlikely you'll be forced to sell before children are out of education. Also fingers crossed re length of marriage- what sort of dad tries to remove roof over their children's head?