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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Unnecessary reporting

32 replies

spyacademy · 24/10/2020 18:51

I did another post about this but basically my gf reporting people for breaking rules which is more trouble than it's worth and it’s causing conflicts now with the neighbours. It’s my parents house and they don’t want conflicts with the neighbours. I just don’t what to do because she’s done it since March when it all started and continuning. There been people continuing to do it but she needs to ignore them.
There was these young guys getting in this car about 3 or for of them and I was just in my car then she was there taking a picture of their reg plate, it’s like come on them guys could have saw her then thought why she taking pictures of the vehicle and attacked us. It’s illegal to do that take pictures of people’s stuff without permission. When we got home she was straight on the phone reporting people.

We have also come to the point we have been having arguments because she again reported neighbour again recently for something minor and she’s been doing it so much since March. My parents said they if she’s going to cause conflicts with the neighbours by reporting them then she’s going to have to leave so I agreed with my parents but she was mad with me with agreeing. I think she just needs to stop reporting everyone I because it’s not worth it. I told her it’s easy just stop reporting people and then everything will be fine.

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 24/10/2020 18:55

Why are you allowing yourself to be dragged down with her like this?. Why are you seemingly still with this woman?. Its not your fault she is like this and you cannot help rescuer and or save someone else.

ChaChaCha2012 · 24/10/2020 18:55

Your parents have given her clear rules, she stops reporting or she leaves. If she objects, remind her how much she loves rules when they affect other people.

spyacademy · 24/10/2020 19:04

@AttilaTheMeerkat

Why are you allowing yourself to be dragged down with her like this?. Why are you seemingly still with this woman?. Its not your fault she is like this and you cannot help rescuer and or save someone else.
My parents are trying to get me to encourage her to just stop it. I'm with her for obvious reasons
OP posts:
spyacademy · 24/10/2020 19:04

@ChaChaCha2012

Your parents have given her clear rules, she stops reporting or she leaves. If she objects, remind her how much she loves rules when they affect other people.
Spot on
OP posts:
spyacademy · 24/10/2020 19:13

She just seems so eager on reporting people and I think it's honestly a waste of polices time. I actually hate snitches with a passion I know it sounds a bit childish but I just wouldn't be able to snitch on someone especially for just getting in a car. Now I'm with a girlfriend who loves snitching

OP posts:
ChaChaCha2012 · 24/10/2020 19:17

Is she not able to live with her parents?

Guitarstrings · 24/10/2020 19:21

ChaChaCha1012 her parents have probably told her to leave because she’s been reporting their neighbours too!

spyacademy · 24/10/2020 19:21

@ChaChaCha2012

Is she not able to live with her parents?
She moved in with us because we got in the relationship
OP posts:
category12 · 24/10/2020 19:39

Well, you're not suited. It happens.

spyacademy · 24/10/2020 19:40

@Guitarstrings

ChaChaCha1012 her parents have probably told her to leave because she’s been reporting their neighbours too!
She moved with us before this whole coronavirus I think but maybe her parents might have done that as well
OP posts:
spyacademy · 24/10/2020 19:40

@category12

Well, you're not suited. It happens.
Who's right in this situation?
OP posts:
pog100 · 24/10/2020 20:05

It doesn't matter who is right, you aren't suited to living with other. I would cut your losses now.

spyacademy · 24/10/2020 20:08

@pog100

It doesn't matter who is right, you aren't suited to living with other. I would cut your losses now.
Alright
OP posts:
category12 · 24/10/2020 20:12

If you're all about who's right, you're not really thinking about this in the best way.

spyacademy · 24/10/2020 20:13

@category12

If you're all about who's right, you're not really thinking about this in the best way.
I was just worrying that I might sound like a cunt moaning about snitches and I might sound disrespectful
OP posts:
mummydoingamasters · 24/10/2020 20:14

To be brutally honest she sounds uptight and high maintenance.

I agree with the PP, you don't sound well matched at all and she will only likely get worse as the rules get stricter and it will be you and your parents who suffer the fallout with neighbours.

Aquamarine1029 · 24/10/2020 20:17

Ffs, op. Get rid of her. You're not suited for each other, she is causing nothing but trouble for your parents, and she's wildly disrespectful. Add to that she's unhinged. Kick her out and be done with it.

spyacademy · 24/10/2020 20:21

@mummydoingamasters

To be brutally honest she sounds uptight and high maintenance.

I agree with the PP, you don't sound well matched at all and she will only likely get worse as the rules get stricter and it will be you and your parents who suffer the fallout with neighbours.

Yes
OP posts:
spyacademy · 24/10/2020 20:22

@Aquamarine1029

Ffs, op. Get rid of her. You're not suited for each other, she is causing nothing but trouble for your parents, and she's wildly disrespectful. Add to that she's unhinged. Kick her out and be done with it.
Probably a good idea tbf
OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 24/10/2020 20:23

"My parents are trying to get me to encourage her to just stop it.
I'm with her for obvious reasons"

You've tried that too and it has not worked. She does this because she can.

You may well love her but love is not enough here. You are being dragged down by this person.

spyacademy · 24/10/2020 20:25

@AttilaTheMeerkat

"My parents are trying to get me to encourage her to just stop it. I'm with her for obvious reasons"

You've tried that too and it has not worked. She does this because she can.

You may well love her but love is not enough here. You are being dragged down by this person.

She keeps saying she's doing it to protect lives and the spread of the virus
OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 24/10/2020 20:30

She keeps saying she's doing it to protect lives and the spread of the virus

Tell her she's free to do so, from somewhere else. Your poor parents. Your loyalty should lie with them. This batshit woman is being horribly disrespectful, and so are you if you don't immediately send her packing. Your parents have been nothing but generous and this is how they're paid back.

Maxine3477 · 24/10/2020 20:31

Sounds like she has waaay too much free time. Do she have a job? Any hobbies? Friends?

AttilaTheMeerkat · 24/10/2020 20:31

She is doing this for her own reasons and besides which is she is not the world's policeman.

What about you in all this, her needs here are not more important than yours.

spyacademy · 24/10/2020 20:31

@Aquamarine1029

She keeps saying she's doing it to protect lives and the spread of the virus

Tell her she's free to do so, from somewhere else. Your poor parents. Your loyalty should lie with them. This batshit woman is being horribly disrespectful, and so are you if you don't immediately send her packing. Your parents have been nothing but generous and this is how they're paid back.

Ok, I might pack her off then
OP posts:
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