DP cross there's no food - part 2

[droopyears]

I didn't realise I'd have to start a new thread - it's amazing the amount of people that have offered advice / made me laugh, it's appreciated

It was the strangest thing! Yes Yeo Valley yoghurts and milk

I've not been able to change the locks but I've double locked the door this afternoon, as he doesn't have a key for the bottom lock

I do however, have his bike at mine (which won't fit in my car, only his)

Good for you, love, and good for your kids! You'll have a much nicer time without him.

Well done. Superb mummying.

Yes! So glad you're able to escape him by double locking the door!
Enjoy your time with the DC :-)

Get your tokens back OP!

It's hard and your life has taken such a turn over the last week. You're doing so well, it's a lot to become adjusted to. However I think you're doing the right thing. He may have some redeeming features but I can't see how they can overcome what he has shown you all this week. Be kind to yourself

He's staying quiet because after his flounce put he thinks you'll be feeling bad ... he's waiting for you to ask him back ... hmm nope 🙄

I too am glad there is a second thread as I have become curiously invested in your life!
(Spoke to my DP on the phone tonight and he said 'What happened to that nice lady with the man-child who wouldn't let her kids play his game!'. )

Glad you had a nice evening, you and your kids sound lovely.

He. Stole. Your. TOKENS????!!!!!

Fuck that bitch up, OP!!!!!

And yes, definitely change the locks asap.x.

Glad you and DC had a good evening 👍👊

Really pleased to read about someone who eventually says, fuck that you're an arse, piss taking man child and I already have children and they're 100% more adult than you. Fuck you to the curb.

Once upon a time I worked in a very large building in a very large organisation. There were 8 floors (I think) and two kitchen areas on each floor. In any large organisation there will be light-fingered types, of course, and people from other floors were occasionally seen helping themselves to someone else's milk etc. One time I had a pack of little fromage frais of which I would have a couple a day with my sandwiches. Came in to find someone had made away with just the strawberry ones. For some reason this made me more indignant than if they had swiped the whole pack - the cold-blooded entitled-ness of helping oneself to just the bits of someone else's stuff that you fancy.

@droopyears it’s Wednesday today....apparently, it’s the best day of the week because it’s food shopping day!

Please, please make a meal that you and your sons love but something he’d veto.

You're playing this so well now, OP!

But do change the locks when you get a chance, he's not to be trusted. Anyone who nicks yoghurt tokens is a wrong'un.

oh goodness, Id forgotten it was The BEST day of the week (my shopping just arrived too!)

I wonder if he will try to turn up tonight

Have you communicated any of this to him?

I know there's some satisfaction in waiting for him to figure it out himself, but I think it's unreasonable to expect him to guess that these behaviours are no longer acceptable to you after 4 years of apparently being ok with them.

So whats your plan the next time he comes round and rattles the locked door trying to get in for his (free) dinner?

I found you!

I'm honestly not surprised you haven't heard from him. He's giving you time to 'miss him' so he'll be able to crawl back into your life. He has a surprise in store there, I think.

He'll be round this evening salivating, as it's your food shopping day.

TwentyViginti...I would bet on that!!

Really glad you had a nice meal with your DC. Remember, you have shown them some really important lessons:

1. Their mum will not out up with them being treated badly- no matter who is doing it
2. It's not OK to take advantage of people. If someone does it to you it's OK not to put up with it (even if they are your boyfriend/girlfriend) and if you do it to someone else you can expect to be kicked to the curb.
3. Their mum is strong

Don't put up with his bike in your conservatory. Leave it outside (with a lock if you feel very kind) and tell him to collect it by Friday or you'll offer it for free collection on freegle etc (then do it!). Reclaim the space in your conservatory and play lots of games with your DC there

I've not sent him a message regarding his belongings yet, this past week has been a bit of a shock and I need a bit of time to get my head around it all!

I'm not surprised in the slightest that I haven't heard from him - if we argued in the past he would go silent (for days at a time, once even a week!), until I messaged and said sorry for whatever I (hadn't) done

I'm considering asking his sister to collect his bits, including the bike so that I don't have to get in contact, that might be a bit easier all round

However I will send him a message at some point this week to explain that I've had enough now and it's done

YES!!
You got rid of him. When I read your original post I was just horrified by the blatant piss taking from this man. Now you got him GONE. This has made my week! Yes! Show him what you’re made of. Get that fucker gone

Good for you

Oh and remind him that stealing the yoghurt tokens from your kids was an all time low, too

Asking the sister to collect his stuff sounds like a good idea.

While I would be tempted to mention that there had been a misunderstanding around Yeo vouchers, and you would like yours back, it would almost certainly be better to write them off as the cost of getting rid of him.