Gaslighting - always intentional?

[fourplusfour]

Just that really. Is gaslighting always done purposefully or do some people behave that way without meaning to upset or confuse?

I'm planning to leave. When I finally realised why I was feeling so worthless and why I was so close to breaking down, I realised I had to for my kids. It's a bit of a long process because I have significant long term health issues and 2 of our 3 boys are autistic, one with very significant support needs.

I know it's not good whatever it is. More thinking aloud having read this. I thought of it all as gaslighting but I don't know if the effects on me are deliberate, as in he's trying to make me feel crazy or if its more that he'll twist anything to get what he wants and doesn't care if it messes with my mind.

@AlreadyGone44

So basically he's always right and your always wrong.

What are the chances of that being correct

Youv'e been fed a new reality.

Permission to leave granted

Thanks everyone for sharing their opinions and experiences. It's been helpful to me in looking at my own situation.